I'm mother to a 17 year old daughter who has a history of adhd/bipolar issues. We've passed the mental institution stages and calling the cops for uncontrollable behavior. Current issue is simple. All I ask is that she keeps her room clean and does not cuss directly at me. I've given up on her not cussing at all so I just ask she doesn't cuss 'at' me. She refuses. Tells me she is an equal. I should treat her like one and I will see a difference in her. So I said fine...I'll treat you as an equal. This means I don't have to tell you to clean your room...you will just automatically do it. She said..nope. Never mind. I'm done. I want the family (her brother, my boyfriend and me) to just pretend she doesn't exist. She slams her door, cusses like a sailor, her room is disgusting. Her father won't cut her phone off and I'm not calling the cops out to get it from her. Besides, she would just act worse if I took it from her. She makes our families' home MISERABLE. She is extrememly unpleasant and she wants it to be all about HER. She'll throw anyone she can under the bus to make herself look good to everyone else. Her mood swings are unbearable. Any suggestions? Please. Her dad won't take her in and that is where she wants to live. I don't know how to keep the peace in my home and I don't know how to be a parent to someone who refuses to be parented.