It's not letting up. One poor choice after another, I guess he is where he wants to be in life? Or, he'd stop and change courses.
He's had an array of self-inflicted problems since he was 15 and he began using drugs. (MJ then xanax then, and now, DXM) His bio father has an addiction history (past-drugs and current-etoh), also paternal uncle (drugs/etoh) and grandmother (etoh).
Son was in rehab for 5 mos(mandated by court) back in 2010 and just finished 12wks of drug classes(mandated by court). He has several felony charges (all from under age 18 but one). The one after 18 that has stuck and which he is on probation for, is battery to EMS. He was drugged up on DXM and Xanax that night and EMS was called to check his medical stability, as he was slurring and talking to a tree. When he was told he was going to the hospital, he tried to run and they held him down, causing one of them to get an abrasion when he fought. Hence, the charge.
In Feb, he was virtually GIVEN a free car. Someone in the family passed. He was given that persons car which was in mint condition. Since Feb, he somehow caused several dents in the car (front and back) and needed 2 new rims & one new tire as he must have driven up on some curb causing the damage. All since Feb 2012.
He has risky behavior. He recently fought 2 guys while at a 'friends' house who apparently tried to steal another friends wallet (a different friend, one who travelled there with him). He had to get 4 staples to his head when he was walking away and they threw a rock at his head. He did not tell me about this, I found from a post he put on FB about how he got his staples removed! When I called him and semi-freaked out on him about how dangerous it was what he did, (those guys could've had a gun or knife) he defended his actions and said he had to 'take care of' his friend whose wallet was being taken.
He chooses to keep these friends who are not really his friends, he thinks they are. They all have the same risky behavior....so he keeps them. He can't keep a girlfriend because they can't handle him. One of them was recently talking to me and she told me she found a bottle of cough syrup in his car. (DXM)
Late last week, he totalled the car. He is FINE. Thank GOD.
The week before the accident, he FINALLY got a job and a few days before the accident, he was at the local college finding out what he needs to do to start in the fall. Then the accident.
I am so sad for him. And I am angry at him. But there is nothing I can do for him. He is very stubborn. He has always REFUSED to go to NA. I had him to numerous counselors, one was very good. He refused to followup.
We have talked and talked with him until we can talk no more. He must be ok with this life. He is a very intelligent person. Very handsome person. Was in advanced classes. Now, he acts like a ghetto, risk-taking 19yo with the emotional maturity of a 15yo due to the drugs.
Even with the recent car incident, last night he was out risk taking. He butt-dialed me at around 1am. I could hear one of his friends and him talking for about 2 minutes. They were flicking a lighter and I believe they were out in some woods because I heard them talking about some of the trees and how some were SO thin and tall. Then, I heard my son say something like 'I'm fixing to go and climb up that tree!'
My son is living with his paternal grandmother. She has minimal to no, control over him. We live 9hrs away. His father is several states away....My son is stuck where he is due to another year of probation, plus he wouldn't leave his friends anyway. His dad tried to get him to move to the other state with him, offered to get the probation moved, son refused.
I fear now that he is going to lose (or has already) his brand new job. He is now car-less. Had a free like brand new car (to him) one day and now NONE-it's gone. How will he go to college now?
Apparently, this is NOT his bottom.....with the conversation that I overheard just last night between he and his friend. Out gallavanting.
I spoke with him last Wed when he was at the college meeting with someone re: signing up. I believe the accident happened on Thurs, the next day. His grandmother is not very friendly to me and won't talk to me on the phone. Only an occasional text or email with minimal information so I am clueless pretty much. I get most of my information about him from him (this is occasional and MINIMAL), his FB page posts and a secret friend that will talk to me once in awhile, a girl that used to like him.
NOW, SINCE THE ACCIDENT, MY SON WONT ANSWER MY CALLS, I AM SURE HE DOES NOT WANT TO FACE ME AFTER TOTALLING A CAR THAT CAME FROM A BELOVED FAMILY MEMBER WHO PASSED ON.
That car was basically all he had to his name other than clothes and laptop. It was free and clear, paid for. Now what for him? How will he go to college now in the fall? How will he keep this new (barely part-time) job that he JUST got?
I am so sad, so sad, so sad. I just want him to be happy....why doesn't HE want to be happy? Or, IS he happy like this? I just can't fathom that......thank you for listening.
He's had an array of self-inflicted problems since he was 15 and he began using drugs. (MJ then xanax then, and now, DXM) His bio father has an addiction history (past-drugs and current-etoh), also paternal uncle (drugs/etoh) and grandmother (etoh).
Son was in rehab for 5 mos(mandated by court) back in 2010 and just finished 12wks of drug classes(mandated by court). He has several felony charges (all from under age 18 but one). The one after 18 that has stuck and which he is on probation for, is battery to EMS. He was drugged up on DXM and Xanax that night and EMS was called to check his medical stability, as he was slurring and talking to a tree. When he was told he was going to the hospital, he tried to run and they held him down, causing one of them to get an abrasion when he fought. Hence, the charge.
In Feb, he was virtually GIVEN a free car. Someone in the family passed. He was given that persons car which was in mint condition. Since Feb, he somehow caused several dents in the car (front and back) and needed 2 new rims & one new tire as he must have driven up on some curb causing the damage. All since Feb 2012.
He has risky behavior. He recently fought 2 guys while at a 'friends' house who apparently tried to steal another friends wallet (a different friend, one who travelled there with him). He had to get 4 staples to his head when he was walking away and they threw a rock at his head. He did not tell me about this, I found from a post he put on FB about how he got his staples removed! When I called him and semi-freaked out on him about how dangerous it was what he did, (those guys could've had a gun or knife) he defended his actions and said he had to 'take care of' his friend whose wallet was being taken.
He chooses to keep these friends who are not really his friends, he thinks they are. They all have the same risky behavior....so he keeps them. He can't keep a girlfriend because they can't handle him. One of them was recently talking to me and she told me she found a bottle of cough syrup in his car. (DXM)
Late last week, he totalled the car. He is FINE. Thank GOD.
The week before the accident, he FINALLY got a job and a few days before the accident, he was at the local college finding out what he needs to do to start in the fall. Then the accident.
I am so sad for him. And I am angry at him. But there is nothing I can do for him. He is very stubborn. He has always REFUSED to go to NA. I had him to numerous counselors, one was very good. He refused to followup.
We have talked and talked with him until we can talk no more. He must be ok with this life. He is a very intelligent person. Very handsome person. Was in advanced classes. Now, he acts like a ghetto, risk-taking 19yo with the emotional maturity of a 15yo due to the drugs.
Even with the recent car incident, last night he was out risk taking. He butt-dialed me at around 1am. I could hear one of his friends and him talking for about 2 minutes. They were flicking a lighter and I believe they were out in some woods because I heard them talking about some of the trees and how some were SO thin and tall. Then, I heard my son say something like 'I'm fixing to go and climb up that tree!'
My son is living with his paternal grandmother. She has minimal to no, control over him. We live 9hrs away. His father is several states away....My son is stuck where he is due to another year of probation, plus he wouldn't leave his friends anyway. His dad tried to get him to move to the other state with him, offered to get the probation moved, son refused.
I fear now that he is going to lose (or has already) his brand new job. He is now car-less. Had a free like brand new car (to him) one day and now NONE-it's gone. How will he go to college now?
Apparently, this is NOT his bottom.....with the conversation that I overheard just last night between he and his friend. Out gallavanting.
I spoke with him last Wed when he was at the college meeting with someone re: signing up. I believe the accident happened on Thurs, the next day. His grandmother is not very friendly to me and won't talk to me on the phone. Only an occasional text or email with minimal information so I am clueless pretty much. I get most of my information about him from him (this is occasional and MINIMAL), his FB page posts and a secret friend that will talk to me once in awhile, a girl that used to like him.
NOW, SINCE THE ACCIDENT, MY SON WONT ANSWER MY CALLS, I AM SURE HE DOES NOT WANT TO FACE ME AFTER TOTALLING A CAR THAT CAME FROM A BELOVED FAMILY MEMBER WHO PASSED ON.
That car was basically all he had to his name other than clothes and laptop. It was free and clear, paid for. Now what for him? How will he go to college now in the fall? How will he keep this new (barely part-time) job that he JUST got?
I am so sad, so sad, so sad. I just want him to be happy....why doesn't HE want to be happy? Or, IS he happy like this? I just can't fathom that......thank you for listening.
