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new here - worn out and at my wits end
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<blockquote data-quote="SRL" data-source="post: 22841" data-attributes="member: 701"><p>Yes, I agree that less focus on academics is best for nearly all of the little ones. </p><p></p><p>Just a couple of thoughts here. Sometimes children just aren't ready for a structured preschool setting and they don't do well. These kids may or may not have underlying issues--it's just part of the natural differences in kids. As a country we've been moving towards earlier and more academic due both to most moms being in the workforce and NCLB mandates. And preschools are notoriously rigid on the two areas where children who aren't ready usually struggle: calendar time and nap time. This can make for some very unhappy campers.</p><p></p><p>Children who have underlying issues usually struggle in preschool regardless of the setting. I agree that your daughter was likely very stressed but I also think most kids rebound pretty quickly when immersed in a new setting that's more positive and more suitable to them. I know your doctor believes otherwise but the fact that she's displaying some pretty major behavioral stuff makes me lean in the direction that it would be better to rule out problems than to let it go and continue wasting time if she does indeed need it. 3 year olds can be difficult when under stress but most of them do bounce back quickly once the stress is removed and both the new baby and the new preschool . What I'm pulling this thread and yesterday's is </p><p>Chronic am crankiness, inflexibility/Rigidity, anger, striking out physically when she doesn't get her way, defiant, very bright, early verbal skills-talks like an adult.</p><p></p><p>I know you have a very full plate already but like totoro I'm going to encourage you to keep a journal over the next few weeks. Record all instances of the problem behaviors and what, if any, triggered them. This will help you start looking for patterns and you will want to keep an open mind. For instance, right now you're operating on the principle that she's still stressed from her last preschool experience when maybe what's really going on is that she's stressed from being away from home. (My difficult child was like that--he needed lots of downtime at home to be emotionally well in his early days. He also couldn't handle being rushed until about 3rd grade. Almost guaranteed meltdowns in both cases) Instead of thinking she's knocking down blocks because she isn't getting her way/biting sister for no reason, be open to perhaps she doesn't understand what's expected of her socially and/or doesn't care.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SRL, post: 22841, member: 701"] Yes, I agree that less focus on academics is best for nearly all of the little ones. Just a couple of thoughts here. Sometimes children just aren't ready for a structured preschool setting and they don't do well. These kids may or may not have underlying issues--it's just part of the natural differences in kids. As a country we've been moving towards earlier and more academic due both to most moms being in the workforce and NCLB mandates. And preschools are notoriously rigid on the two areas where children who aren't ready usually struggle: calendar time and nap time. This can make for some very unhappy campers. Children who have underlying issues usually struggle in preschool regardless of the setting. I agree that your daughter was likely very stressed but I also think most kids rebound pretty quickly when immersed in a new setting that's more positive and more suitable to them. I know your doctor believes otherwise but the fact that she's displaying some pretty major behavioral stuff makes me lean in the direction that it would be better to rule out problems than to let it go and continue wasting time if she does indeed need it. 3 year olds can be difficult when under stress but most of them do bounce back quickly once the stress is removed and both the new baby and the new preschool . What I'm pulling this thread and yesterday's is Chronic am crankiness, inflexibility/Rigidity, anger, striking out physically when she doesn't get her way, defiant, very bright, early verbal skills-talks like an adult. I know you have a very full plate already but like totoro I'm going to encourage you to keep a journal over the next few weeks. Record all instances of the problem behaviors and what, if any, triggered them. This will help you start looking for patterns and you will want to keep an open mind. For instance, right now you're operating on the principle that she's still stressed from her last preschool experience when maybe what's really going on is that she's stressed from being away from home. (My difficult child was like that--he needed lots of downtime at home to be emotionally well in his early days. He also couldn't handle being rushed until about 3rd grade. Almost guaranteed meltdowns in both cases) Instead of thinking she's knocking down blocks because she isn't getting her way/biting sister for no reason, be open to perhaps she doesn't understand what's expected of her socially and/or doesn't care. [/QUOTE]
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