new here

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by datgurlb, Mar 14, 2009.

  1. datgurlb

    datgurlb datgurlb

    Hi I am new to this but anything would help.. I have a 10 year old son who since was four and started school have had behavoir problems I was always told because he is one of three boys he is 10 I also have a 9 and 8 years old. any who this school year has been extremely rough yesterday I took my 10 year old to see a thearpist and they prescribed invega and zoloft i have been reading and its for schisophrenia. I am confused and looking just to understand
  2. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Hi, there and welcome.

    First of all, it would help us if we had more of a background. Who diagnosed your son? Has he ever seen a neuropsychologist?

    I swear, they come up with the silliest reasons why our kids behave like they do, especially when they are not the type of professionals who know how to test. I have three sons too and none of them have ever been in a fight (that I know of :redface:). Two are grown and one is 16. Violence or aggression from any child is a red flag that something is going on--but testing is the best way to find out what it is. It's not YOUR fault or "bad parenting." I have a few questions to help you start. Also, you may want to do a signature, like I did belowl.

    1/How was his early development? Did he cuddel, make strong eye contact (even with strangers?), play with toys the right way, interact appropriately with his same-age peers, speak on time? Did he have any sensitivities to foods, clothes, loud noise? Any strange repetitive movements like arm flapping or lining things up in a row or making high-pitched screechy noises or smacking lips? How does he do in school? What sets him off? Can he transition well from one activity to another? Is he obsessed with anything, like overly consumed with computers?

    2/Are there any psychiatric or substance abuse issues on either side of his family tree?

    I'm sure the medications have nothing to do with schizophrenia. They are often used for other things as well.

    Nice to "meet" you. Sorry you had to come...
  3. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    MidWest is great at leading people to neuropsychologist testing and showing you things to look at/for. Like sensitivity to cloths, food, light - I never would have thought to look at those. But like MidWest, lots of people here have experience in clues to look for. I am not that experienced, I tend to try to help in the day to day life struggles that you need to deal with while trying to sort out the medical causes.

    So, if you are comfortable, answer Midwest's questions then start your search for a neuropsychologist and in the meantime, you can call and ask the doctor for more info:

    1. Why these medications?
    2. What will they do to help?
    3. What diagnosis do you base this on?
    4. Can I get a referral for a 2nd opinion?
    5. What are my options?

    If docs are prescribing medications, they should be explaining the reasons to the parents.

    My difficult child's pediatrician doctor told us a couple years ago, "I don't know, but I think this is anxiety so here is Zoloft." I just couldn't give my son medications based on an "I don't know, I think" diagnosis so we went for a 2nd opinion. You have to be sure (well atleast feel some level of confidence in your doctor) when dealing with mental health. The pediatrician doctor gave us options: Take the Zoloft, get a 2nd pediatrician doctor opinion, or go to the mental health clinic.
    Last edited: Mar 15, 2009
  4. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    Welcome. I'm glad you found you way here.

    Invega is an atypical antipsychotic (essentially long-acting Risperdal) that is used to treat hallucinations, but it is also prescribed to treat mood swings associated with Bipolar Disorder, anger and aggression. Zoloft is an SSRI antidepressant that is used to treat anxiety and depression.

    You are looking to have your son tested by a pediatric neuropsychologist, not a neurologist.

    As soon as you answer MidwestMom's questions, we'll be back on to point you in the right direction for help.

    Again, welcome.
  5. rejectedmom

    rejectedmom New Member

    Just wanted to welcome you to this board. -RM
  6. datgurlb

    datgurlb datgurlb

    I am 30 years old I have three boys he is the oldest He was the best baby everything was on track. He was happy all the time didn't cry much, his brothers are really close in age but that was not a problem. It started when I put him in school age 4. He was hiding under tables pulling papers off wall. I didn't believe it because he was not like that at home. He was being sent home almost twice a week because of things at school and I kinda looked the other way because really he was not doing those kinds of things at home. then one day he did and it really scared the hell out of me his strength was more than i caould handle by myself and my sister in law at the time helped me calm him down. Well I took him to coulseling that seemed to help, for a little while. The doctor put him on ridalin and then the pychaiatrist said he was not adhd he was then diagnosed as emotionally disturbed ok what do i do. well the school was very helpful we worked very hard together and I just recently moved him to another school and within one week he was being charged with 2 counts of assault. I just no that I didnot want my kids on medications but now I was reading over some information it really is my fault he is this way
  7. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    I am sorry - my fingers get messsed up with medical terms. Small World is correct, I should have said "neuropsychologist". I have since edited my reply.

    As long as you have always done what you thought was in your son's interest, you are not the cause of any thing. What is, is. Go forward with what you have and others here can help guide you. You will find input here with the knowledge that only you know the entire story and can take or leave anything you get here.

    Look at how home and school differ. What can the school be doing that is being successful for you at home? He has been easy and happy and on track at home would indicate that you have provided a safe environment for him. Use the positives to try to figure out why the negatives. The results of neuropsychologist testing will also give you options to make your son's life easier.

    medications are o.k. as long as they are used properly. The challenge is to find out which medications are best. Know that as your child grows, the medications need to be updated so when you find something that works, it may stop working at your child's next physical change. For that you need to really trust the doctor prescribing them. Members on this board also have tons of experience with medications so bring what you are prescribed here if you have questions about it.
  8. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I would still get the neuropsychologist evaluation. It's not your fault and reading that it is isn't helping him. I'd get proactive and take him in for an evaluation. I don't think that changing your parenting style will help nor do I believe it is anything you've done wrong. He just seems to be a kid who is wired differently and I'd want to find out why. "Emotionally disturbed" is so generic and doesn't explain anything. I'd want to know EXACTLY what was going on, and a neuropsychologist evaluation is the best for that. I'll bet he won't call him emotioinally disturbed nor say it's your fault. Take care, whatever you decide to do.
  9. JLady

    JLady A ship lost in the night

    Welcome to the board. It really isn't your fault. Because of our issues, we tend to blame ourselves. Acceptance that our kids may have a problem is very difficult. We have been to different doctors and psychologist since last November. I didn't agree with the diagnoises or reasoning of the doctors so we kept looking until we found someone to help us.

    I still have difficulty with the results but at least I can say "ah, that's why he does this or that." Don't give up. Find another doctor or ask yours for more information.

    What your son is experiencing probably isn't his fault and he probably doesn't have any control over the situation. Get him the help he needs so he can be helped.

    Take some really deep breaths. The medications you described are used for many different things. I know the really scary words always jump out at me too and I freak out. Get more information. Being informed is the best thing you can do.
  10. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Hi datgirlb, welcome.

    Since your son improved a bit, then started up again, do you think that taking him off of the Ritalin had an affect?

    Have you gotten the Invega and Zoloft prescriptions filled yet? I don't know anything about Invega, but the Zoloft takes weeks or months to take affect. (Unless, as in our case, you see side effects immediately. :( )

    I think you need a better diagnosis. He is so young, it will be hard to get a really good diagnosis, but you seem to be working with-impulsivity, anger, and aggression. Can you stand back and see what his triggers are? As others here have mentioned, bright lights, noise, fabric textures, plus emotional immaturity, "Me" issues, and transitions, i.e. changes from one situation to the next, such as "Now we are going to put our books away and sing a song." That could be enough a change that he is just not ready for ... does he need to slowly transition from one thing to another?

    I'm sorry he's acting up in school. Can you take a few hrs one day to observe him with him not seeing you?