I have an 18 year old son who is a senior in H.S. I have joint custody of him and his brother with my ex-husband - but due to an argument over the summer between my son and his fater, my son has been living with me and my new husband. My ex and I have both been re-married almost 9 years and we all 4 have mantained a very close relationship to help all the kids involved. Here are some of the problems: 1. My 18 year old is ADHD and was on medications to help with this until two years ago. He went off them becuase he said it was affecting how he didn't have a personality - and over the course of 8 years we tried several differnt ones. Since he's been off the medications, he has drasticlly gone down hill, lost interest in sports (which he was good at several - but espically had a passion for soccer), lost interest in JrROTC that he has been in since a freshman and his school work has been a challenge. My son had a job dishwasher job and always got a lot of praise from his boss and co-workers about how dependable he was and what a hard worker he was - but the place had to close over a month ago and he hasn't shown much interest at all in finding another job...even with my help. 2. In addition to all that, he started hanging out with a kid who we later found out had a mother who was supplying acholol, weed and possibly sex to her son's friends. This kid introduced him to another two kids who had to go through "Thunderbird Acadamy" to get a graduation certificate from H.S. due to substance abuse and other related issues. My son met these kids after they had come back and have been put up in a winabego (with no running water) but connected to one of the parent's business for the electric because as the mother told me "we have other kids we don't want him to corrupt and as soon as he turns 18 he has to move". 3. My son now has a 14 year old girlfriend that I know they are having sex. He started smoking cigars and cigerattes very openly about a month ago and has told us he doesn't want to live here anymore but doesn't have any other options. While I'm dealing with all this, lastly my husbands son, who is disrespectful and rude everytime he is around, which is only when he wants somehting - just called to tell us he is coming today and staying until Tuesday......which has almost put me over the edge. After opening presents this morning, my son left to see his girlfriend....and told me he really didn't much like leather (we got him a leather coat, among some nice other things) and wanted to know when he could take it back.....I'm sure for the money. BASICALLY THE REASON FOR THE POST IS TO SEE IF ANYONE CAN JUST CHAT/OFFER OPINIONS OR SUGGESTIONS on what I can do regarding my 18 year old son. We are a middle class family with good values.....I'm not sure what went wrong where or what I can do at this point. Part of me just wants him out of the house, part of me wants to keep things together in whatever way possible until he can just graduate, and part of me is scared to dealth that whatever happens it will tear my marrriage apart because of the HUGE amount of guilt/frustration I feel towards everyone and everything right now. by the way - I have made an appointment for a counslor tomorrow - so I don't go totally off the ledge. Thanks for your time or any insight/suggestions. (sorry for the spelling errros, I couldn't find spell check).