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new strategies for challenging 5 year old?
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<blockquote data-quote="InsaneCdn" data-source="post: 554426" data-attributes="member: 11791"><p>Hi, and welcome.</p><p></p><p>First, my personal bias: I do not buy into ODD as a useful diagnosis, other than as a placeholder for when professionals can't find the "real" problem yet. It is a diagnosis with no interventions, accommodations or medications that help... and at least in my experience, and observation of others, usually there is "something else" going on.</p><p></p><p>And no, it is NOT your parenting! (you'll have heard that, I'm sure...!)</p><p></p><p>Do you keep a journal? Everything from bed-time/wake-time/quality of sleep, what is eaten and when, what kind of activities are going on that day (and when), and the behaviours that are happening. When you write it all down for a few weeks, patterns often emerge that you don't see on a day-to-day basis.</p><p></p><p>Example: My difficult child was... worse in the afternoon than in the morning, and much worse on Friday than on Monday. Something was causing accumulated issues to build up. It took us a lot of years to get to the bottom of it, but... it ended up being several different things, which taken together were a serious deficit. And then, compound that with many years of being treated the wrong way by school and medical systems (it's attitude, he's lazy, let him fail and that will teach him... )... and we have major issues to deal with.</p><p></p><p>The definitions of Asperger's and Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) are just "lines in the sand" on a whole range of challenges. Some kids have many Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD)-ish challenges (things that tend to go with Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) but not always), and are not on the spectrum... other kids are definitely on the spectrum but don't have so many of the other challenges. These include: sensory, motor skills, social challenges, LDs, and APDs (there are probably others).</p><p></p><p>You're dealing with sensory and motor skills.</p><p>Social stuff with peers can be the result of the sensory and motor skills issues plus developmental immaturity (was for our difficult child)... they get left out of the playground activities etc. because they can't keep up... and it can be very subtle.</p><p>The biggest single issue we finally found? Auditory figure ground deficits (a form of Auditory Processing Disorders (APD)). But... even the professionals who know how to find these, often can't test for them until age 7 or so, due to the complexity of the tests.</p><p></p><p>All of these can result in "burn-out" and "melt-downs". The current 'trigger' may just be the 'last straw' rather than the "real" trigger. </p><p></p><p>You're doing well. You've gotten him some good evaluations and some good help. But... it really can be a long day when we're in the middle of it all!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="InsaneCdn, post: 554426, member: 11791"] Hi, and welcome. First, my personal bias: I do not buy into ODD as a useful diagnosis, other than as a placeholder for when professionals can't find the "real" problem yet. It is a diagnosis with no interventions, accommodations or medications that help... and at least in my experience, and observation of others, usually there is "something else" going on. And no, it is NOT your parenting! (you'll have heard that, I'm sure...!) Do you keep a journal? Everything from bed-time/wake-time/quality of sleep, what is eaten and when, what kind of activities are going on that day (and when), and the behaviours that are happening. When you write it all down for a few weeks, patterns often emerge that you don't see on a day-to-day basis. Example: My difficult child was... worse in the afternoon than in the morning, and much worse on Friday than on Monday. Something was causing accumulated issues to build up. It took us a lot of years to get to the bottom of it, but... it ended up being several different things, which taken together were a serious deficit. And then, compound that with many years of being treated the wrong way by school and medical systems (it's attitude, he's lazy, let him fail and that will teach him... )... and we have major issues to deal with. The definitions of Asperger's and Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) are just "lines in the sand" on a whole range of challenges. Some kids have many Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD)-ish challenges (things that tend to go with Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) but not always), and are not on the spectrum... other kids are definitely on the spectrum but don't have so many of the other challenges. These include: sensory, motor skills, social challenges, LDs, and APDs (there are probably others). You're dealing with sensory and motor skills. Social stuff with peers can be the result of the sensory and motor skills issues plus developmental immaturity (was for our difficult child)... they get left out of the playground activities etc. because they can't keep up... and it can be very subtle. The biggest single issue we finally found? Auditory figure ground deficits (a form of Auditory Processing Disorders (APD)). But... even the professionals who know how to find these, often can't test for them until age 7 or so, due to the complexity of the tests. All of these can result in "burn-out" and "melt-downs". The current 'trigger' may just be the 'last straw' rather than the "real" trigger. You're doing well. You've gotten him some good evaluations and some good help. But... it really can be a long day when we're in the middle of it all! [/QUOTE]
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