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New to board-Daughter ADHD with-ODD???
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<blockquote data-quote="Nancy" data-source="post: 117776" data-attributes="member: 59"><p>ottb,</p><p></p><p>The book I suggested will not help you deal with your difficult child, but it will go far to explain things. I wrestled with the question for years about what we were doing wrong to not have a more positvie impact on her. I now understand that it was predestined to be that way. Another book referred to in the book Identical Strangers is Nature's Thumbprint. I don't think it can be found in libraries but I'm going to buy a used copy on amazon. It also deals with studies done on seperated at birth identical twins and what place heredity plays in their lives. Although the studies were unethical and highly immoral and would not be allowed today, it is the best glimpse we have into understanding nature vs. nurture. We can stop beating ourselves up over why they are behaving this way.</p><p></p><p>I'm glad you are finding yourself not alone. Over the years I have found so many adoptive parents dealing with the same issues. It's an immediate understanding of each other. Just two years ago I found myself on the doorstep of another adoptive Mom who's daughter and my daughter were getting involved in some things and trying to sneak out together. When she discovered we adopted our daughter she hugged me and said "we understand each other far better than we can ever explain to anyone."</p><p></p><p>Nancy</p><p></p><p>P.S. I got Identical Strangers on audio CD and listen to it in the car driving places. It's very calming and passes the time. But I find myslef say oooh and ahhhh and scrambling for paper to write down things I want to check out on the computer later for more background in the studies done.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nancy, post: 117776, member: 59"] ottb, The book I suggested will not help you deal with your difficult child, but it will go far to explain things. I wrestled with the question for years about what we were doing wrong to not have a more positvie impact on her. I now understand that it was predestined to be that way. Another book referred to in the book Identical Strangers is Nature's Thumbprint. I don't think it can be found in libraries but I'm going to buy a used copy on amazon. It also deals with studies done on seperated at birth identical twins and what place heredity plays in their lives. Although the studies were unethical and highly immoral and would not be allowed today, it is the best glimpse we have into understanding nature vs. nurture. We can stop beating ourselves up over why they are behaving this way. I'm glad you are finding yourself not alone. Over the years I have found so many adoptive parents dealing with the same issues. It's an immediate understanding of each other. Just two years ago I found myself on the doorstep of another adoptive Mom who's daughter and my daughter were getting involved in some things and trying to sneak out together. When she discovered we adopted our daughter she hugged me and said "we understand each other far better than we can ever explain to anyone." Nancy P.S. I got Identical Strangers on audio CD and listen to it in the car driving places. It's very calming and passes the time. But I find myslef say oooh and ahhhh and scrambling for paper to write down things I want to check out on the computer later for more background in the studies done. [/QUOTE]
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