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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 73945" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>Hi, welcome. I saw your thread from afar, saw that other people had replied and waited, I've been limited in time.</p><p></p><p>But I'm here. Reaping the benefit of others who got in ahead of me. </p><p></p><p>The ODD - don't expect a label like this to be a door-opener in terms of leading to a fix. my own view is that ODD is what happens when our parenting method, no matter how much it fits with recommendations, simply fails to fit a child's individual variations. You might use the same, good parenting technique on a series of kids who all turn out fine, then you get one kid where this parenting technique not only doesn't work, it makes them worse. That book - it can show you why and turn it around. Be prepared to change your parenting style even though you feel you've been doing it right - it's just not right FOR HER. because she's not an average child.</p><p></p><p>The Sensory Integration Disorder (SID) issues - yup, sounds very familiar. Both my girls took their undies off in public. easy child did it, it turns out, because she was being molested by an older boy in school. Took us two years to find out, damage was done, the boy was beyond reach. I've since heard of other cases, different schools - I think it happens far more than we know.</p><p>easy child 2/difficult child 2 did it for reasons which I think are the same as your daughter - she liked being naked, she liked the feeling of freedom and she is very fussy about textures and sensation.</p><p>Interestingly, she & I were talking yesterday about an incident where she took her skirt and undies off at after-care at school and was happily running around, lower half naked. A 'teacher' (male, not really relevant I guess) came out and told her to get her clothes back on. By this stage another kid had run off with easy child 2/difficult child 2's knickers and thrown them into a tree. The teacher held out hr skirt but she wouldn't put it on because in her mind, knickers go on first. But he had spoken, he would be obeyed, so after tantrums she put on her skirt so he would then fetch her knickers. Once he handed them to her, she took off her skirt, put on her knickers and then put on her skirt. Partly to make a point, and partly because in her mind, there is a natural order to things.</p><p></p><p>She is old enough to be told, "It is not polite to go without clothing in public. it is not polite to go without undies in public. People will think you are not being looked after properly."</p><p>She likes dresses and skirts (boy, does she sound like easy child 2/difficult child 2!) so I would say to her, "If you want to wear a pretty dress or skirt, you MUST wear your underwear. No underwear, you wear trousers or shorts.</p><p></p><p>The Sensory Integration Disorder (SID) thing is a serious problem. You may need to learn to sew. Sewing stretch-knit underwear looks tricky but actually is cheap and easy, once you've got the instructions. No special sewing machine needed - just ordinary straight stitch. That way you can get her to help choose the fabrics and the trim that she can cope with the feel of.</p><p>T-shirts can be made into t-shirt dresses or you can make your own. If she's really sensitive to seams, do French seams or sew with the seams on the outside. Kids with epidermolysis bullosa have to have their clothes specially made and wear them with seams outside, because in their case the friction will actually run skin off entirely. These Sensory Integration Disorder (SID) kids only feel like that is happening.</p><p></p><p>Shop with her, get her to feel the texture of the fabrics next to her skin. You're already doing the right thing in removing tags. But some fabrics are still a disaster - a lot of the shiny polyesters are actually prickly on the seam and are uncomfortable. Don't push her into buying something, or you could be wasting your money. And for her, colour is also going to be equally important. She could be at an age where she wants to wear pink - if that stops, go with it and stop buying pink things.</p><p>Fabrics that should work for her - stretch knit, soft jersey cotton, polar fleece, stretch velvet. For lighter fabrics - voile, muslin, broderie anglaise (maybe). Avoid lace unless it's very soft. Lacy elastic could be a problem although there are some lovely wide forms which you can use to make underwear out of, without anything else. You may find, though, that all elastic needs to be without trim and inside a casing.</p><p></p><p>I remember making easy child a summer dress out of sheeting. It was pure cotton, bought as a fragment at a warehouse. Cheap, but very pretty. It had a pattern which was banded - bands of blue flowers, a band of printed lace, another band of flowers - so I used the pattern to make a four-part gored skirt attached to a bodice where I used the printed-on lace panel as a centre feature. Two pattern pieces for the bodice; four identical pieces for the skirt. The sleeves were made from the offcuts from the skirt. I didn't round the skirt, just left the four points hanging and used the selvedge edge, so there was no hem. I stitched some lace as a trim to the outside of the bodice but nowhere did the lace touch her skin so it was OK. I sewed in a sash so she could have a bow at the back which would adjust as she grew. It sounds complicated but it was very simple. I didn't even have a pattern for anything other than the bodice. The sleeves were just flaps of fabric stitched to the armhole. She could wear that dress climbing trees or rolling down a hill.</p><p></p><p>easy child 2/difficult child 2 is the worst about textures. We learned to let her have her way. Now she buys her own clothes and also does some of her own sewing.</p><p></p><p>Good luck. And I would be considering Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) in some form here, it often looks like ADD at first.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 73945, member: 1991"] Hi, welcome. I saw your thread from afar, saw that other people had replied and waited, I've been limited in time. But I'm here. Reaping the benefit of others who got in ahead of me. The ODD - don't expect a label like this to be a door-opener in terms of leading to a fix. my own view is that ODD is what happens when our parenting method, no matter how much it fits with recommendations, simply fails to fit a child's individual variations. You might use the same, good parenting technique on a series of kids who all turn out fine, then you get one kid where this parenting technique not only doesn't work, it makes them worse. That book - it can show you why and turn it around. Be prepared to change your parenting style even though you feel you've been doing it right - it's just not right FOR HER. because she's not an average child. The Sensory Integration Disorder (SID) issues - yup, sounds very familiar. Both my girls took their undies off in public. easy child did it, it turns out, because she was being molested by an older boy in school. Took us two years to find out, damage was done, the boy was beyond reach. I've since heard of other cases, different schools - I think it happens far more than we know. easy child 2/difficult child 2 did it for reasons which I think are the same as your daughter - she liked being naked, she liked the feeling of freedom and she is very fussy about textures and sensation. Interestingly, she & I were talking yesterday about an incident where she took her skirt and undies off at after-care at school and was happily running around, lower half naked. A 'teacher' (male, not really relevant I guess) came out and told her to get her clothes back on. By this stage another kid had run off with easy child 2/difficult child 2's knickers and thrown them into a tree. The teacher held out hr skirt but she wouldn't put it on because in her mind, knickers go on first. But he had spoken, he would be obeyed, so after tantrums she put on her skirt so he would then fetch her knickers. Once he handed them to her, she took off her skirt, put on her knickers and then put on her skirt. Partly to make a point, and partly because in her mind, there is a natural order to things. She is old enough to be told, "It is not polite to go without clothing in public. it is not polite to go without undies in public. People will think you are not being looked after properly." She likes dresses and skirts (boy, does she sound like easy child 2/difficult child 2!) so I would say to her, "If you want to wear a pretty dress or skirt, you MUST wear your underwear. No underwear, you wear trousers or shorts. The Sensory Integration Disorder (SID) thing is a serious problem. You may need to learn to sew. Sewing stretch-knit underwear looks tricky but actually is cheap and easy, once you've got the instructions. No special sewing machine needed - just ordinary straight stitch. That way you can get her to help choose the fabrics and the trim that she can cope with the feel of. T-shirts can be made into t-shirt dresses or you can make your own. If she's really sensitive to seams, do French seams or sew with the seams on the outside. Kids with epidermolysis bullosa have to have their clothes specially made and wear them with seams outside, because in their case the friction will actually run skin off entirely. These Sensory Integration Disorder (SID) kids only feel like that is happening. Shop with her, get her to feel the texture of the fabrics next to her skin. You're already doing the right thing in removing tags. But some fabrics are still a disaster - a lot of the shiny polyesters are actually prickly on the seam and are uncomfortable. Don't push her into buying something, or you could be wasting your money. And for her, colour is also going to be equally important. She could be at an age where she wants to wear pink - if that stops, go with it and stop buying pink things. Fabrics that should work for her - stretch knit, soft jersey cotton, polar fleece, stretch velvet. For lighter fabrics - voile, muslin, broderie anglaise (maybe). Avoid lace unless it's very soft. Lacy elastic could be a problem although there are some lovely wide forms which you can use to make underwear out of, without anything else. You may find, though, that all elastic needs to be without trim and inside a casing. I remember making easy child a summer dress out of sheeting. It was pure cotton, bought as a fragment at a warehouse. Cheap, but very pretty. It had a pattern which was banded - bands of blue flowers, a band of printed lace, another band of flowers - so I used the pattern to make a four-part gored skirt attached to a bodice where I used the printed-on lace panel as a centre feature. Two pattern pieces for the bodice; four identical pieces for the skirt. The sleeves were made from the offcuts from the skirt. I didn't round the skirt, just left the four points hanging and used the selvedge edge, so there was no hem. I stitched some lace as a trim to the outside of the bodice but nowhere did the lace touch her skin so it was OK. I sewed in a sash so she could have a bow at the back which would adjust as she grew. It sounds complicated but it was very simple. I didn't even have a pattern for anything other than the bodice. The sleeves were just flaps of fabric stitched to the armhole. She could wear that dress climbing trees or rolling down a hill. easy child 2/difficult child 2 is the worst about textures. We learned to let her have her way. Now she buys her own clothes and also does some of her own sewing. Good luck. And I would be considering Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) in some form here, it often looks like ADD at first. Marg [/QUOTE]
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