Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
New to forum. 18 yo daughter leaves house. I am lost.
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Echolette" data-source="post: 629361" data-attributes="member: 17269"><p>These separations always remind me of National Geographic documentaries...you know, where the young adult lion attacks the big senior lion, or the young stag attacks the herd leader, and they go at it as though to the death. Usually the younger one is driven out, to go find a new herd or pack. Occasionally the older one is killed, and the younger one is the new leader. It is violent, dramatic, and seems to the death...and it is exactly what we do, with less blood. It seems very natural and right to me.</p><p></p><p>My daugher, who is now 20 and whom I adore, was from hell from 14-18. She couldn't stand me, spent as much time away from home as possible and the rest of it in her room, screamed at me, ran away, called me toxic...and then she left for college. And I dropped all attempts at advice or control simultaneously...because you know what? She lives 2000 miles away. I have no idea what she does with her days and nights, or at least the tiny tiny window I have does not reflect reality. So I stopped telling her what to do or even asking questions.</p><p></p><p>And we are so much better. We love each other, miss each other, text and message each other, skype if it has been too long...she visits me and I visit her. But if she stays too long, guess waht...I start controlling oh such a little bit, and she starts resisting....and best we move apart again!</p><p></p><p>Let her go. Give her space. Practice a "I have faith that you either can handle this or will learn with experience. Good for you for trying it on your own. I love you." standard. It will be good for you and for her.</p><p></p><p>I am sorry it is sad. Its hard to let our kids go. But it must be so, so do it with grace.</p><p></p><p>Echo</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Echolette, post: 629361, member: 17269"] These separations always remind me of National Geographic documentaries...you know, where the young adult lion attacks the big senior lion, or the young stag attacks the herd leader, and they go at it as though to the death. Usually the younger one is driven out, to go find a new herd or pack. Occasionally the older one is killed, and the younger one is the new leader. It is violent, dramatic, and seems to the death...and it is exactly what we do, with less blood. It seems very natural and right to me. My daugher, who is now 20 and whom I adore, was from hell from 14-18. She couldn't stand me, spent as much time away from home as possible and the rest of it in her room, screamed at me, ran away, called me toxic...and then she left for college. And I dropped all attempts at advice or control simultaneously...because you know what? She lives 2000 miles away. I have no idea what she does with her days and nights, or at least the tiny tiny window I have does not reflect reality. So I stopped telling her what to do or even asking questions. And we are so much better. We love each other, miss each other, text and message each other, skype if it has been too long...she visits me and I visit her. But if she stays too long, guess waht...I start controlling oh such a little bit, and she starts resisting....and best we move apart again! Let her go. Give her space. Practice a "I have faith that you either can handle this or will learn with experience. Good for you for trying it on your own. I love you." standard. It will be good for you and for her. I am sorry it is sad. Its hard to let our kids go. But it must be so, so do it with grace. Echo [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
New to forum. 18 yo daughter leaves house. I am lost.
Top