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<blockquote data-quote="Mikey" data-source="post: 29327" data-attributes="member: 3579"><p><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: KFld</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Mike,</p><p>as far as your son not really being involved with the family, that is also an age thing...</div></div></p><p></p><p>Thanks, KFld. Good timing on this point; difficult child's therapist is also <strong>my</strong> therapist, and basically said the same thing just yesterday. He went on to remind me that not all "bad" behaviour is acting out against me/us. Some of it is just plain old testosterone poisoning that all teenage males suffer from. </p><p></p><p>With my difficult child, the normal crud that teen males do is mixed in with the things that happen when he morphs from easy child to difficult child, and it's hard to tell the difference. doctor cautioned that I be very careful in what I react to, and how I react, because while <strong>I</strong> may not know the difference between acting out and "normal" teen behaviour, difficult child <u>definitely</u> knows the difference; and if I react as if he's acting out when it's just normal teenage stupidity, it will only give difficult child more license to act out.</p><p></p><p>And most importantly, he said don't take <u>anything</u> he does personally. That's the one I have a hard time with, but then again, that's also why I see a therapist myself and have a couple of good Rx that help me stay clear-headed during a conflict.</p><p></p><p>Ugh! And how, exactly, did we ever live through this as a teen? :smile:</p><p></p><p>Take care,</p><p>Mikey</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Mikey, post: 29327, member: 3579"] <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: KFld</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Mike, as far as your son not really being involved with the family, that is also an age thing...</div></div> Thanks, KFld. Good timing on this point; difficult child's therapist is also [b]my[/b] therapist, and basically said the same thing just yesterday. He went on to remind me that not all "bad" behaviour is acting out against me/us. Some of it is just plain old testosterone poisoning that all teenage males suffer from. With my difficult child, the normal crud that teen males do is mixed in with the things that happen when he morphs from easy child to difficult child, and it's hard to tell the difference. doctor cautioned that I be very careful in what I react to, and how I react, because while [b]I[/b] may not know the difference between acting out and "normal" teen behaviour, difficult child <u>definitely</u> knows the difference; and if I react as if he's acting out when it's just normal teenage stupidity, it will only give difficult child more license to act out. And most importantly, he said don't take <u>anything</u> he does personally. That's the one I have a hard time with, but then again, that's also why I see a therapist myself and have a couple of good Rx that help me stay clear-headed during a conflict. Ugh! And how, exactly, did we ever live through this as a teen? [img]:smile:[/img] Take care, Mikey [/QUOTE]
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