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<blockquote data-quote="DazedandConfused" data-source="post: 181892" data-attributes="member: 831"><p><span style="color: #333333"><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Welcome Threelittles!</span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: #333333">Your plate is certainly piled high. However, you have probably found, <strong><em>in my opinion, </em></strong>the single best resource, on your journey of having to raise a difficult child. So, today is a good day!</span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: #333333">Even when dealing with the professionals, unless there is tangible medical evidence, it's all their opinion. At this point, and after reading your post, your bucket is overflowing with opinions from them. As I have told, and continue to tell, the professionals I have to consult with, "I'm the computer. You are the data. Once the information is input into my system, I make the decision". I have learned long ago, and the hard way, after my daughter was nearly died due to a MD dismissing my concerns about my 1 year old daughter, they have their own agendas, weaknesses, and frankly, incompetency (my daughter, a few weeks later, unbeknown to me, was near death with leukemia).However, you certainly have had to deal with a lot of professionals, so you don't come into this difficult child game unarmed. </span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: #333333">You have great responses so far. So here are a few of my opinions: </span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: #333333">Neuropsychologist-I would respectfully disagree that unless you heading in the direction of medication don't bother with a neuropsychologist evaluation. It is not their function to recommend, nor can they prescribe, medication. I found the one I had done on both of my difficult children very helpful. However, if you have one done while your difficult child is so young, it may not be the last time you may choose to have one. Think of it as another tool for you to, hopefully, understand your difficult child and to help him. Believe me, as in my Son's case when he had one done last year, it didn't answer all the questions, but I did gain more insight and had more clarification on how I was going to proceed with services for him. </span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: #333333">Daughter had one when she was three because I was concerned about the effect the lumbar punctures, AKA spinal taps, with methotrexate, on her brain development. She also had a speech delay and was very hyperactive and tantrum prone. In those days, I was trying to get as much, and as many, services as I could for her. At one point, I was driving her to speech therapy three times a week-two through the hospital, and one through the school district.</span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: #333333">Centralization of care: I so understand your desire for this! It may not be possible. Especially, as your difficult child gets older. Though I don't have as many appointments as I used to, many of the professionals I use, and have used in the past, are far flung all over the place. Be open, and flexible, to seeking the best treatment that may be outside where you prefer. <strong><em>You</em></strong>, most likely, will be the center.</span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: #333333">Medication: This area is the most difficult, in my opinion. I would have never imagined that I would be medicating my children. Though, daughter is not on any medications now mostly through her choice. The first time someone, a school speech therapist, off handedly during an evaluation, mentioned that my son might need medication because of his hyperactivity. I was outraged. In fact, I nearly knocked the table over that was between us, when I indignantly stood up and declared, "My child will never be put on medication! How dare you!"</span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: #333333">That reaction came from a Mother that had was terrified that, once again, she had to deal with a child, which had issues. After daughter, her chemo, and taking enough medication to last ten people ten lifetimes, I wasn't too exactly open to that idea. </span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: #333333">My bottom line is this-if you can help difficult child to have a productive and happy life without medication, I think that is wonderful. I know that many parents here I had success with more "natural" type treatments. I applaud them. Some haven't had success. </span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: #333333">For me, I finally did get to the point where I felt like it was my last resort. All the books, all the techniques I had learned, though helpful, my home was still an out of control war zone and getting worse with my daughter hitting 13. Honestly, the first medications that both of them were prescribed (at different times, mind you) were not helpful. However, I did find one psychiatrist, who really listened and worked with me. My daughter was put on a mood stabilizer and boy did it ever help. Eventually, it didn't work so well, but it opened the door to allow hope into my life, and hers, again. </span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: #333333">Son, who is the most anxiety angst kid ever, did not respond to anything at first. Though diagnosed with ADHD, and he is very hyperactive and impulsive, none of the traditional ADHD medications helped. In fact, they made his severe irritability completely unbearable! He was horrible to be around. Finally, the psychiatrist prescribed Risperdal. I have to tell you, it literally changed our family. We could finally go out and have a meal without having to leave because Son would have a meltdown, or constantly pick fights with his sister. Son (as I refer to him here) finally was able to have a few friends because before barely anyone was able to stand to be around him.</span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: #333333">Now, I am not, by any stretch of the imagination, recommending medication. It has very real risks and very real side effects. And, it isn't a panacea. It's another option to consider, if and when, you ever think it's necessary. </span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: #333333">Anyway, I've blathered on long enough.</span></span></p><p><span style="color: #333333"><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/peaceful.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":peaceful:" title="peaceful :peaceful:" data-shortname=":peaceful:" /></span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DazedandConfused, post: 181892, member: 831"] [COLOR=#333333][FONT=Verdana]Welcome Threelittles![/FONT][/COLOR] [FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#333333]Your plate is certainly piled high. However, you have probably found, [B][I]in my opinion, [/I][/B]the single best resource, on your journey of having to raise a difficult child. So, today is a good day![/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#333333]Even when dealing with the professionals, unless there is tangible medical evidence, it's all their opinion. At this point, and after reading your post, your bucket is overflowing with opinions from them. As I have told, and continue to tell, the professionals I have to consult with, "I'm the computer. You are the data. Once the information is input into my system, I make the decision". I have learned long ago, and the hard way, after my daughter was nearly died due to a MD dismissing my concerns about my 1 year old daughter, they have their own agendas, weaknesses, and frankly, incompetency (my daughter, a few weeks later, unbeknown to me, was near death with leukemia).However, you certainly have had to deal with a lot of professionals, so you don't come into this difficult child game unarmed. [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#333333]You have great responses so far. So here are a few of my opinions: [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#333333]Neuropsychologist-I would respectfully disagree that unless you heading in the direction of medication don't bother with a neuropsychologist evaluation. It is not their function to recommend, nor can they prescribe, medication. I found the one I had done on both of my difficult children very helpful. However, if you have one done while your difficult child is so young, it may not be the last time you may choose to have one. Think of it as another tool for you to, hopefully, understand your difficult child and to help him. Believe me, as in my Son's case when he had one done last year, it didn't answer all the questions, but I did gain more insight and had more clarification on how I was going to proceed with services for him. [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#333333]Daughter had one when she was three because I was concerned about the effect the lumbar punctures, AKA spinal taps, with methotrexate, on her brain development. She also had a speech delay and was very hyperactive and tantrum prone. In those days, I was trying to get as much, and as many, services as I could for her. At one point, I was driving her to speech therapy three times a week-two through the hospital, and one through the school district.[/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#333333]Centralization of care: I so understand your desire for this! It may not be possible. Especially, as your difficult child gets older. Though I don't have as many appointments as I used to, many of the professionals I use, and have used in the past, are far flung all over the place. Be open, and flexible, to seeking the best treatment that may be outside where you prefer. [B][I]You[/I][/B], most likely, will be the center.[/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#333333]Medication: This area is the most difficult, in my opinion. I would have never imagined that I would be medicating my children. Though, daughter is not on any medications now mostly through her choice. The first time someone, a school speech therapist, off handedly during an evaluation, mentioned that my son might need medication because of his hyperactivity. I was outraged. In fact, I nearly knocked the table over that was between us, when I indignantly stood up and declared, "My child will never be put on medication! How dare you!"[/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#333333]That reaction came from a Mother that had was terrified that, once again, she had to deal with a child, which had issues. After daughter, her chemo, and taking enough medication to last ten people ten lifetimes, I wasn't too exactly open to that idea. [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#333333]My bottom line is this-if you can help difficult child to have a productive and happy life without medication, I think that is wonderful. I know that many parents here I had success with more "natural" type treatments. I applaud them. Some haven't had success. [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#333333]For me, I finally did get to the point where I felt like it was my last resort. All the books, all the techniques I had learned, though helpful, my home was still an out of control war zone and getting worse with my daughter hitting 13. Honestly, the first medications that both of them were prescribed (at different times, mind you) were not helpful. However, I did find one psychiatrist, who really listened and worked with me. My daughter was put on a mood stabilizer and boy did it ever help. Eventually, it didn't work so well, but it opened the door to allow hope into my life, and hers, again. [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#333333]Son, who is the most anxiety angst kid ever, did not respond to anything at first. Though diagnosed with ADHD, and he is very hyperactive and impulsive, none of the traditional ADHD medications helped. In fact, they made his severe irritability completely unbearable! He was horrible to be around. Finally, the psychiatrist prescribed Risperdal. I have to tell you, it literally changed our family. We could finally go out and have a meal without having to leave because Son would have a meltdown, or constantly pick fights with his sister. Son (as I refer to him here) finally was able to have a few friends because before barely anyone was able to stand to be around him.[/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#333333]Now, I am not, by any stretch of the imagination, recommending medication. It has very real risks and very real side effects. And, it isn't a panacea. It's another option to consider, if and when, you ever think it's necessary. [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#333333]Anyway, I've blathered on long enough.[/COLOR][/FONT] [COLOR=#333333][FONT=Verdana]:peaceful:[/FONT][/COLOR] [/QUOTE]
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