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New year, new scenarios...
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<blockquote data-quote="Littleboylost" data-source="post: 726034" data-attributes="member: 21895"><p>Well in the sprit of a recap for you all and for me to remind myself to detach. </p><p></p><p>This year son lost his entire grade 12 year obtained 3 credits out of 9. Drugged and didn’t attend school. Used his car to sell drugs. </p><p>We took his car away he stole it and ran off. We got him and the car back we removed the car to off site storage he still managed to steal a key and steal car again. He was caught with drugs In our home again he did another runner. Couch surfed for around 10 days. Begged to come home said he would change. </p><p></p><p>3 days home found with a big bag of weed (enough to be selling), called the police he was arrested he also had cocaine on him. We were guilted into bailing him out. </p><p></p><p>I had major surgery son stole my pain medication leaving me with nothing. Found him snorting OxyContin pulled his bail bond he went to juvenile holding for 4 days. Was bailed by a youth support group (John Howard). He begged to come home. I let him. He asked to go to prom of course I let him. I wanted him to see where the graduates where headed. It made no difference. </p><p></p><p>Son got a summer job a total joke maybe went to work 6 times. Found out he was stealing my car while I was asleep. </p><p>Fights, chaos, heel dragging in court, bail and out patient rehab appointments. Found with drugs again was told he could not live with us. Was couch surfing and lied to bail program and gave a fake address. </p><p></p><p>Was arrested for theft and was released! Bail program didn’t pull his bail. He got diversion for second charge of theft although he was not a candidate (system is so broken). </p><p>He was home with the agreement that he would go to rehab when a bed became a available. Bed intake called he refused to participate and he refused to ask the courts for MH diversion to rehab. We asked him to leave home again. </p><p></p><p>He left he set himself up with student social assistance. Was living a town over which was 2 bus rides to school. Fat chance that was going to work. At the end of Oct he turned 18. An adult now. He asked for a ride to court. I drove him but did not go in. He missed some bail meetings and rehab meetings. </p><p></p><p>He called and asked to meet we did he begged to come home said he would go to rehab. We though about this for a week and let him come back home after the rehab intake meeting was booked. All this while he had stolen husband oversees bank card and Visa card and had been stealing money from us. This whole time he was begging for a second chance. </p><p></p><p> Wasn’t home a week when we discovered this had him arreste. Left his ass in jail for 10 days. He detoxed and was in a better frame of mind. We managed with his public defender to have a stay of his charges with the condition that he attend long term rehab. He is free loading at his girlfriends and we are waiting for a bed which will be available very soon. He did compete the intake process. </p><p></p><p>His 3/4 report from school he is still failing. No big surprise. </p><p></p><p>What a year 2017 was!! I lost my mind and got taken down the swirly Whurley of dispare. Found this sight and Naranon. </p><p></p><p>I have surrounded myself with powerful resources and wise people and I have learned how to detach with love and let my son go on his own journey. </p><p></p><p>Indeed 2018 will be the year of detachment. </p><p></p><p>Looking back at 12 months of chaos in a 4 year run. I do wonder how we have survived and remained sane. </p><p></p><p>Son is young but we can not enable him. He will go to rehab and complete the program. If he doesn’t he will be back in jail and face his outstanding charges. If he completes the rehab program there is a good chance his charges will be dropped.</p><p></p><p> He can work on completing high school while he is in rehab and then part time when he comes out. To stay at home he needs to stay clean and get a job. He will pay room and board and contribute to the family and the household in a positive way. If not he is on his own. </p><p></p><p>This forum and my new supoiets and tools help me to stay strong and lead a good and happy life for myself. I have the strength to maintain my boundaries and expectations. </p><p></p><p>Happy Year of Detachment all!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Littleboylost, post: 726034, member: 21895"] Well in the sprit of a recap for you all and for me to remind myself to detach. This year son lost his entire grade 12 year obtained 3 credits out of 9. Drugged and didn’t attend school. Used his car to sell drugs. We took his car away he stole it and ran off. We got him and the car back we removed the car to off site storage he still managed to steal a key and steal car again. He was caught with drugs In our home again he did another runner. Couch surfed for around 10 days. Begged to come home said he would change. 3 days home found with a big bag of weed (enough to be selling), called the police he was arrested he also had cocaine on him. We were guilted into bailing him out. I had major surgery son stole my pain medication leaving me with nothing. Found him snorting OxyContin pulled his bail bond he went to juvenile holding for 4 days. Was bailed by a youth support group (John Howard). He begged to come home. I let him. He asked to go to prom of course I let him. I wanted him to see where the graduates where headed. It made no difference. Son got a summer job a total joke maybe went to work 6 times. Found out he was stealing my car while I was asleep. Fights, chaos, heel dragging in court, bail and out patient rehab appointments. Found with drugs again was told he could not live with us. Was couch surfing and lied to bail program and gave a fake address. Was arrested for theft and was released! Bail program didn’t pull his bail. He got diversion for second charge of theft although he was not a candidate (system is so broken). He was home with the agreement that he would go to rehab when a bed became a available. Bed intake called he refused to participate and he refused to ask the courts for MH diversion to rehab. We asked him to leave home again. He left he set himself up with student social assistance. Was living a town over which was 2 bus rides to school. Fat chance that was going to work. At the end of Oct he turned 18. An adult now. He asked for a ride to court. I drove him but did not go in. He missed some bail meetings and rehab meetings. He called and asked to meet we did he begged to come home said he would go to rehab. We though about this for a week and let him come back home after the rehab intake meeting was booked. All this while he had stolen husband oversees bank card and Visa card and had been stealing money from us. This whole time he was begging for a second chance. Wasn’t home a week when we discovered this had him arreste. Left his ass in jail for 10 days. He detoxed and was in a better frame of mind. We managed with his public defender to have a stay of his charges with the condition that he attend long term rehab. He is free loading at his girlfriends and we are waiting for a bed which will be available very soon. He did compete the intake process. His 3/4 report from school he is still failing. No big surprise. What a year 2017 was!! I lost my mind and got taken down the swirly Whurley of dispare. Found this sight and Naranon. I have surrounded myself with powerful resources and wise people and I have learned how to detach with love and let my son go on his own journey. Indeed 2018 will be the year of detachment. Looking back at 12 months of chaos in a 4 year run. I do wonder how we have survived and remained sane. Son is young but we can not enable him. He will go to rehab and complete the program. If he doesn’t he will be back in jail and face his outstanding charges. If he completes the rehab program there is a good chance his charges will be dropped. He can work on completing high school while he is in rehab and then part time when he comes out. To stay at home he needs to stay clean and get a job. He will pay room and board and contribute to the family and the household in a positive way. If not he is on his own. This forum and my new supoiets and tools help me to stay strong and lead a good and happy life for myself. I have the strength to maintain my boundaries and expectations. Happy Year of Detachment all! [/QUOTE]
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