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Newbie asking advice on how to deal with gambler son
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<blockquote data-quote="SuZir" data-source="post: 529601" data-attributes="member: 14557"><p>You may be right in this. In this specific situation it may be more because of principle than any real danger but it is still something we may want to drive through to difficult child. Just now he is much more valuable to his team and coaches than his pay, so they really don't want to screw him over. But in future that situation will not always be a case. </p><p></p><p>He is in very risky part of his career for his team right now. Even without his issues coming to the way, he may have a lot of consistency issues. It's common for athletes in his sport/position in his current development stage. If everything goes great, peak of his career would be expected to be at ten to fifteen or to even twenty years from now. His current pay is low and if the team would need to hire someone else to do the same job, they would need to pay double or more if it would be someone in same development stage and same level. If they hired someone older and less risky (with less upside but more reliable current performance) they would have to pay four or five times more. Also for his coaches his development and performance is important. Especially so for the coach my son works a lot one on one with. Great development in my son could be a very big deal for his own career also. And if things go perfectly and the difficult child ends up leaving the team and going to the higher level after his time there, the team will be compensated very nicely. So right now they do have my son's career very much in their interest.</p><p></p><p>His agent is someone he hires to handle contract and some financial stuff. Good and long career for my son and keeping him a happy customer is in agent's best interest. And if he would screw my son over, it would end his own career (license taken away etc.) So for now also the agent would be a totally safe choice. He wants his provisions in future, not the peanuts my son is currently paying him. But there has been enough of cases there the agent has screwed their top athletes over, it may be wise to teach the son not to trust too much. And of course the agent may not be willing to spend so much time to one of his smallest customers right now.</p><p></p><p>So yes, me handling his finances for now is many ways the least risky choice. But sometimes it just sucks emotionally. It keeps me in-the-know, but it also means those conflicts. I would probably always wait for other shoe to drop anyway so having access to the information that proves, he is not currently (at least badly) relapsing is kind of comforting. But it also keeps me involved and in risk for all his drama. And he has always been the drama queen extraordinaire.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SuZir, post: 529601, member: 14557"] You may be right in this. In this specific situation it may be more because of principle than any real danger but it is still something we may want to drive through to difficult child. Just now he is much more valuable to his team and coaches than his pay, so they really don't want to screw him over. But in future that situation will not always be a case. He is in very risky part of his career for his team right now. Even without his issues coming to the way, he may have a lot of consistency issues. It's common for athletes in his sport/position in his current development stage. If everything goes great, peak of his career would be expected to be at ten to fifteen or to even twenty years from now. His current pay is low and if the team would need to hire someone else to do the same job, they would need to pay double or more if it would be someone in same development stage and same level. If they hired someone older and less risky (with less upside but more reliable current performance) they would have to pay four or five times more. Also for his coaches his development and performance is important. Especially so for the coach my son works a lot one on one with. Great development in my son could be a very big deal for his own career also. And if things go perfectly and the difficult child ends up leaving the team and going to the higher level after his time there, the team will be compensated very nicely. So right now they do have my son's career very much in their interest. His agent is someone he hires to handle contract and some financial stuff. Good and long career for my son and keeping him a happy customer is in agent's best interest. And if he would screw my son over, it would end his own career (license taken away etc.) So for now also the agent would be a totally safe choice. He wants his provisions in future, not the peanuts my son is currently paying him. But there has been enough of cases there the agent has screwed their top athletes over, it may be wise to teach the son not to trust too much. And of course the agent may not be willing to spend so much time to one of his smallest customers right now. So yes, me handling his finances for now is many ways the least risky choice. But sometimes it just sucks emotionally. It keeps me in-the-know, but it also means those conflicts. I would probably always wait for other shoe to drop anyway so having access to the information that proves, he is not currently (at least badly) relapsing is kind of comforting. But it also keeps me involved and in risk for all his drama. And he has always been the drama queen extraordinaire. [/QUOTE]
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