I registered here back in September but have put off posting up until now. I am a mom of four teens- two bio boys, two adopted girls (unrelated, joined family at 2.5 and 3.5 years old). Three children have special needs. Son, age 13 has aspergers; daughter, age 14 has tourettes; and daughter, age 13 is Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD). For a long time, I blamed myself for their issues and for feeling so overwelmed. I know, it's not rational and there is no way that I caused tics... but it's hard not to think if I just did XYZ, I could solve the behavioral issues of the Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) child or lack of coping skills for the one on the spectrum. Does this make sense? How can one family have so many children with diagnoses?! It must be MY parenting. Son15 is great. Son13 and Daughter14 are currently doing well. GFG13 is the child in crisis. She equates sympathy with love and has left a trail of lies in her wake. She has no friends (except for a few other kids who are just a screwed up as her) because people feel used once they realise she has played their emotions. She has claimed her father's a drunk, he was incarcerated, he died in a wreck, her parents were in the midst of a bitter divorce, her mother (me) won't get out of bed in the morning to drive her to school, her mother beats her.... the list is long and horrible. I try to block it out and move on because thinking about it breaks my heart. I pulled her out of the local public school last year. She was not passing classes and was starting to skip out (pierced her bellybutton in the school bathroom rather than head to class one day). She is currently enrolled in a cyberschool through our state. I'm now finding this set up frustrating because it relies on her being honest about assignments... not a great fit for Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) child. We had her retested for learning disabilities and results were she is borderline retarded (which she's not). I know that I should not be suprised she scored low on purpose, I'm honestly not, but it's still horribly frustrating. This same kid once tested into a level two tumbling class with the gym owner and then pretended she could not do a cartwheel when she was with instructors. Her sister informed me yesterday, GFG13 has been messaging former friends saying I wake her at 4AM to start homeschooling. Good grief! I try to remove the opportunity to lie and she creates new ways for no reason. Why?!?! So today, I'm sad. I do not know how to save the girl from herself. She's hellbent on creating drama. I do not know why CPS has never knocked on my door. It won't be a shock when they do. And I resent her for that. It's hard not to. My other children would have to deal with case workers because GFG13 wants to portray her life as an afterschool special for sympathy. And then I'm ticked at myself for resenting her. She came to us severely underweight, spent her first 2.5 years ignored in an orphanage, I knew there could be damage. She is not currently seeing a psychiatrist. We did therapy for a while and she loooved going. It was fun and her attention seeking behaviors just escalated. I quit scheduling therapy the day she asked if we could do two appointments a week. Right now, her regular pediatritian prescribes concerta and has suggested adding intunive which we are researching. The concerta does calm her down some. I had hoped to send her back to public school for highschool but it's looking like her best course is homeschool. We can not trust her to change classes. She's not willing to work to her potential with strangers whom she can manipulate. I'm having a hard time processing the girl is never going to have the normal school experience I wished for her- prom, cheerleading or dance teams, friends!, favorite teachers. I feel horrible for isolating her from peers. Today, I'm feeling very sad. I was researching how to keep high school transcripts and ended up coming here. I guess I need to hear from others who might understand.