Nine more days. Please let me make it!

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Californiablonde, Mar 24, 2016.

  1. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    Only nine more days till Spring Break and our trip to Hawaii. My anxiety and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) is acting up big time. I keep thinking something bad is going to happen before the trip and we will be unable to go. I can't stop this feeling of impending doom. Sometimes my fears come to light, and other times they mean nothing. I am hoping for the latter.

    Today is not a good day for me anxiety wise. I had a big panic attack hit me out of nowhere while I was at work about an hour ago. Suddenly my heart was racing, I was having heart palpitations, I was sweating, and I felt sick to my stomach. I had to run to the bathroom, and I got sick. I am now back at my desk with a cup of hot tea, feeling a little better but not totally.

    After my big attack, my supervisor yelled at me for making a mistake I have seen her make several times. She yelled in front of the whole office. That did not help my anxiety. I am counting down the minutes till I can go home. I can't handle many more days like these. I want to be in Hawaii NOW! I hope and pray we get there and nothing stands in my way. I needed this vacation months ago! Wish me luck.
     
  2. New Leaf

    New Leaf Well-Known Member

    You can do this CB. Everything will be alright. The weather has been beautiful here. Try to breathe slowly and relax, push away those negative vibes and replace them with good feelings. Soon you will be on the beach........
    leafy
     
  3. Nature

    Nature Active Member

    Taking time for yourself on your vacation will boost those endorphines and re-energize you. I sincerely hope you are able to relax and feel joy and pleasure which you probably have been missing for some time. Feel the sun, wiggle your toes in the sand and make sure you indulge in one pleasure for yourself...whether it's a new piece of clothing, a trinket or even some fatty desert. You deserved it!
     
  4. pigless in VA

    pigless in VA Active Member

    I am so proud of you for coping with an anxiety attack and then a yelling boss. You are a very strong woman. You can handle these last 8 days. :warrior:
     
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  5. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    Okay so I am seriously freaking out. I have been battling stomach problems (diahrrea, constipation) for months. As you all know, I have been trying to lose weight with Weight Watchers and Myfitnesspal. Well this whole week I completely cheated on my diet, and only did two fifteen minute walks. I have probably been eating over 1500 calories every day this week, instead of the 1200 I'm supposed to. I weighed myself this morning, and I suddenly lost 4 pounds in 6 days.

    I have never lost that much weight in one week, even with heavy dieting and exercising. I have all the classic symptoms of late stage stomach cancer. My ex boyfriend's sister just died from stomach cancer. She literally passed away just a couple short months after she was diagnosed. I am convinced it's cancer. I am not ready to go yet. I want to see my future grandchildren grow up. I am not going to get this horrible thought out of my head. I will see a doctor, and eventually a gastroenterologist when the referral comes through. Till then I'm terrified! I don't want to think about this while I'm in Hawaii. Help!
     
  6. New Leaf

    New Leaf Well-Known Member

    My dear CB, by your signature, I see you have IBS, so the foods you have eaten may have caused a flare up. This would cause stomach upset and the runs, so would qualify for the weight loss. Try not to go to catastrophic thoughts, you do not have stomach cancer. It is possible you picked up a stomach bug (you work at a school and kids are little biological germ and virus weapons). You have a highly stressed life, which effects your health.
    I know it is hard, but try to breathe and think positive thoughts.
    Eight more days and you will be on a beach somewhere relaxing.
    Here is a preview for you.



    You are going to be alright (As Kalahou would say)

    (((HUGS)))
    leafy
     
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  7. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    I only had diahrrea one time yesterday. All week I have been regular. I don't think one time of having the runs (it was literally only one time on the toilet) would cause me to have extreme weight loss. I am still worried!
     
  8. Lil

    Lil Well-Known Member

    Honey, you have anxiety and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) - and you are very prone to worrying about things. This is not the first time you've been sure you had stomach cancer. You didn't have it then.

    So facts:
    Stomach cancer is the 15th most common cancer. Which is to say not common at all. Compared to other cancers, it is relatively rare, making up only 1.5% of all cancer cases. It's most often diagnosed in people over 55, the median age being 69. Average age of people dying from it is 72. It is twice as often diagnosed in men than women. The number of people dying from it in a year is about 10,730 - when you consider that there are 319 MILLION people in the United States each year, that is less than .000003%...a tiny, tiny amount of people. In contrast, more than SIXTY times that many die from heart disease!

    It is HIGHLY unlikely you have anything serious.

    Weight fluctuates. It happens for very little reason. Don't panic.
     
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  9. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    I think I am overly worried because my ex boyfriend (the one I broke up with in August) has a sister that just died from stomach cancer. She was only in her early fifties. For whatever reason, they did not catch it until very late. She died two months after she was diagnosed. Now I am seriously freaking out. I forgot to mention that yesterday I felt incredibly, abnormally tired. It literally felt like I was going to pass out at any moment. I was seriously worried I would stop breathing in my sleep. Now today I am having stomach pain, and I feel quite nauseous. I guess I am letting my imagination get the best of me. I just wish these darned physical symptoms would go away.
     
  10. Lil

    Lil Well-Known Member

    I understand, but she is not YOUR relative. So there is NO hereditary thing to worry about. Given how rare stomach cancer is - what do you really think the probability is that you would have the same cancer your ex-boyfriend's sister had? I can't even do the math, but it's got to be infinitesimally small.

    I know you have seen doctors for this before. They didn't diagnose it then.
     
  11. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    I saw a doctor for colon cancer. So far I have not been screened for stomach cancer.
     
  12. Lil

    Lil Well-Known Member

    I'm not a doctor...but I'm pretty darn sure they don't just assume if you're free of one you're free of all. If that doctor, who would be the same type of doctor as would look for stomach cancer, had ANY reason to think you had a different type of cancer, he would have looked. There would have been abnormalities in blood work, if nothing else. Use logic, dear. You are worrying needlessly. ((BIGHUGS))
     
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  13. New Leaf

    New Leaf Well-Known Member

    My dearest CB, I am probably preaching to the choir, so please forgive me. If you already have extreme anxiety and heaped upon that are real stressors in your life, your job, your difficulties with your daughter and an upcoming trip, this is anxiety times infinity. You must know already that anxiety causes stomach problems. I do not have an anxiety disorder, but do have stress. I get stressed when preparing for trips too, worrying about packing, forgetting something, being at the airport on time. OMG, driving in a different city (my kids have told me after our fall trip that they will not let me drive.....) I digress. When I am anxious, my stomach hurts and I even get palpitations at times.
    Is it possible, with all of this piling up, your anxiety and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) acting up, that your stomach is on overdrive?
    About the weight loss, when I am on a diet, the weight loss comes in spurts and sometimes with anxiousness and a bit of dehydration there are jumps. Four pounds in six days is not super drastic for me. That happens sometimes, even if I have overdone it a couple of days, then the next week, the overdoing shows up as weight gain.......That being said, I am hoping with all my heart that you do not have stomach cancer.
    I do understand going to drastic conclusions when not feeling well. It happens to me too, I am convinced I have some terrible disease. But, I have to push it to the back of my mind.
    That may be difficult for you to do because of your Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and anxiety, so it is a vicious circle. The mind is a very powerful thing.
    Are there any coping skills that you can use to help ease all of the worries? It would be a shame if you worried yourself sick so that you couldn't enjoy this trip that you are so looking forward to.
    I hope you can find time to relax this weekend and ease your mind. The week will go by quickly enough and then you will be off to paradise. YAY!
    Please take care.

    (((HUGS)))
    leafy
     
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  14. Nature

    Nature Active Member

    Stress too plays havoc on our bodies and I know you've been under a lot of stress lately. I do hope you'll recoup and regain more peace of mind on your vacation. Hugs from me as well.
     
  15. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    I have done weight watchers before, and sometimes I would be really excited about being down, but by the time I weighed in at class, I would be looking to have lost anything!

    Try not to obsess...enjoy your vacation... KSM
     
  16. FlowerGarden

    FlowerGarden Active Member

    As others have stated, anxiety and stress play havoc on your digestive system. Try your hardest to picture yourself relaxing on the beach in Hawaii every time your anxiety pops up. The more you get yourself to relax, the better you will feel. Have a fantastic trip!
     
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  17. New Leaf

    New Leaf Well-Known Member

    CB, I hope you are feeling better today.
    (((Hugs)))
    leafy
     
  18. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    I am so, so SO frustrated. I had a terrible day mentally and physically on Monday, and I tried to type about it here, and I am being blocked from posting it. Then I tried to copy and paste in a whole new thread, and I am still being blocked. I went over the post multiple times and tried to change it to see if it would let me post, and it still won't let me post. In short, Monday was awful. I survived it. End of story. I hope this posts!
     
  19. New Leaf

    New Leaf Well-Known Member

    Yay it posted and now it's Wednesday!!!!Almost there, dear. Sorry about your frustrating day Monday, but here we are a new day, new start and best of all you are closer to your much needed vacation! Yay!
    (((Hugs)))
    leafy
     
  20. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    Thanks Leafy Monday was scary. I didn't sleep the night before. I was awake all night sweating and shaking, in terror. At work the next day my heart was beating very hard in my chest, stomach, and throat. All day long my heart kept skipping beats and I couldn't breathe. I honestly thought I was going to suddenly stop breathing and I was going to die at work. Then later that night I was convinced my heart would stop beating while I was sleeping and I would never wake up. Tuesday I felt much better, although still had some mild anxiety. Monday was awful, and I hope and pray I never experience something like that again.
     
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