Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Not a banner evening
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 406787" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>Hey WO - </p><p> </p><p>I've said this once - and I'll say it again - I'm SO glad I had BOYS. I'm a girl.....I get girls......I would NOT WANT. GIRLS. Much tougher to understand. Very (um.....ahh....moody) .....yes.....moody. hehe. Ahem. </p><p> </p><p>There was that little irritating thing written on our therapists wall that said or someone did it in needlepoint for him - Anger is depression turned inside out. Could be a smidge of truth in there. I figured when I was angry? I was just plain angry. When I was angry at her age? I just blew up. Not so in control - either. (sad to say) And at some point in my life I remember being in one of Dude's Residential Treatment Center (RTC)'s and seeing a sign that said "It's okay to be angry." next line - How you handle that anger means even more or says a lot about your character or something like that but the "It's okay to be angry." or Give yourself permission to BE angry." it was like - REALLY? Huh - </p><p> </p><p>I don't ever remember anyone telling me - "You know Star, it's OKAY if you want to be P.O'd to the max about that." To me growing up it was always like - "Don't be angry.....oh Don't get mad.......or Stop that gritting your teeth. I mean - You'd think somewhere in there - SOMEONE would have said 'GO AHEAD and be FREAKIN mad. So at that point I sat with Dude and did the same thing - and It was like a light went off in HIS head too. Not kidding one bit. I mean he even turned to me and said "WHAT?" I said "Well go ahead and be angry.....and when you're done being angry about it.....come talk to me, just don't tear anything up....or if you to - here....(hands a stack of computer paper) shred the mess out of this over and over.....and then come see me and when you are ready we'll talk. And with that - he would rip the paper - throw it all over the place - and then walk past me and say "I AM NOT DONE BEING ANGRY YET - I NEED TO GO FOR A WALK." I would ignore him and casually say "OH OKAY - I'll be here when you get back...." and off he'd go - then he'd come back - and when he'd come back? I wouldn't hover.....I'd wait - until HE came to me, then we'd sit down, talk - I'd have a casual attitude about it - and that was the beginning of helping him cope. </p><p> </p><p>He needed coping skills for his anger NOT "WHAT"S WRONG NOW?" he needed OUTLETS.......He needed to know it was OKAY - to scream or hit or kick and do yoga or walk or have anger exercises - they are awesome by the way - they take all your energy and I challenge anyone to try to even move after you do it. Hard, very hard. Strains you completely.....</p><p> </p><p>So maybe you can find an anger management therapist or ask your psychiatrist for some anger management exercises - Sounds lame - WORKS wonders. </p><p> </p><p>Especially the one where she gets so angry - then sits in the chair......hands under her legs and tenses up to the point of nearly passing out and tries to lift herself out of the chair as hard as she can......OMG - yeah that one.....you do that for about 1 minute - and I promise you - you can't hardly walk. And you almost forget you are that angry. </p><p> </p><p>hugs</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 406787, member: 4964"] Hey WO - I've said this once - and I'll say it again - I'm SO glad I had BOYS. I'm a girl.....I get girls......I would NOT WANT. GIRLS. Much tougher to understand. Very (um.....ahh....moody) .....yes.....moody. hehe. Ahem. There was that little irritating thing written on our therapists wall that said or someone did it in needlepoint for him - Anger is depression turned inside out. Could be a smidge of truth in there. I figured when I was angry? I was just plain angry. When I was angry at her age? I just blew up. Not so in control - either. (sad to say) And at some point in my life I remember being in one of Dude's Residential Treatment Center (RTC)'s and seeing a sign that said "It's okay to be angry." next line - How you handle that anger means even more or says a lot about your character or something like that but the "It's okay to be angry." or Give yourself permission to BE angry." it was like - REALLY? Huh - I don't ever remember anyone telling me - "You know Star, it's OKAY if you want to be P.O'd to the max about that." To me growing up it was always like - "Don't be angry.....oh Don't get mad.......or Stop that gritting your teeth. I mean - You'd think somewhere in there - SOMEONE would have said 'GO AHEAD and be FREAKIN mad. So at that point I sat with Dude and did the same thing - and It was like a light went off in HIS head too. Not kidding one bit. I mean he even turned to me and said "WHAT?" I said "Well go ahead and be angry.....and when you're done being angry about it.....come talk to me, just don't tear anything up....or if you to - here....(hands a stack of computer paper) shred the mess out of this over and over.....and then come see me and when you are ready we'll talk. And with that - he would rip the paper - throw it all over the place - and then walk past me and say "I AM NOT DONE BEING ANGRY YET - I NEED TO GO FOR A WALK." I would ignore him and casually say "OH OKAY - I'll be here when you get back...." and off he'd go - then he'd come back - and when he'd come back? I wouldn't hover.....I'd wait - until HE came to me, then we'd sit down, talk - I'd have a casual attitude about it - and that was the beginning of helping him cope. He needed coping skills for his anger NOT "WHAT"S WRONG NOW?" he needed OUTLETS.......He needed to know it was OKAY - to scream or hit or kick and do yoga or walk or have anger exercises - they are awesome by the way - they take all your energy and I challenge anyone to try to even move after you do it. Hard, very hard. Strains you completely..... So maybe you can find an anger management therapist or ask your psychiatrist for some anger management exercises - Sounds lame - WORKS wonders. Especially the one where she gets so angry - then sits in the chair......hands under her legs and tenses up to the point of nearly passing out and tries to lift herself out of the chair as hard as she can......OMG - yeah that one.....you do that for about 1 minute - and I promise you - you can't hardly walk. And you almost forget you are that angry. hugs [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Not a banner evening
Top