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The Watercooler
not looking forward to upcoming drama
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 570454" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>UAN, first of all, I am so sorry about the loss of your brother. Gentle hugs for you..........</p><p></p><p>Families are so complicated, aren't they? When I was reading your post I thought of a saying I heard in a codependency class, but it could be applied here in your scenario too...........the saying was, the different between codependency and loving kindness is that with codependency you feel bad (and often resentful) and with loving kindness you feel good............seems that the gifts to your brother in law and sister in law fall under the <em>feeling bad</em> category. For me that translates into giving where it feels good to give and leaving the rest out, regardless of the reasons, just doesn't feel good.</p><p></p><p>The fact that your brother in law and sister in law could not act in a compassionate and appropriate way about your brother along with the way they handled the gift giving speaks to their lack of a generosity of spirit which you possess in spades. <em>I'll have a glass of bubbly thanks.</em></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 570454, member: 13542"] UAN, first of all, I am so sorry about the loss of your brother. Gentle hugs for you.......... Families are so complicated, aren't they? When I was reading your post I thought of a saying I heard in a codependency class, but it could be applied here in your scenario too...........the saying was, the different between codependency and loving kindness is that with codependency you feel bad (and often resentful) and with loving kindness you feel good............seems that the gifts to your brother in law and sister in law fall under the [I]feeling bad[/I] category. For me that translates into giving where it feels good to give and leaving the rest out, regardless of the reasons, just doesn't feel good. The fact that your brother in law and sister in law could not act in a compassionate and appropriate way about your brother along with the way they handled the gift giving speaks to their lack of a generosity of spirit which you possess in spades. [I]I'll have a glass of bubbly thanks.[/I] [/QUOTE]
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