Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
not so fun night...
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="SuZir" data-source="post: 585080" data-attributes="member: 14557"><p>That rule we had too. Though we only took things temporarily. After all, we could come up with nicer things to do with our time than go to work and earn money so we could buy ourselves closets full of toys to keep confiscated. So flying toys were confiscated only for certain time. First for an hour, then a day, then a week and in the end for a month. Then he braked that habit in his earlish teens, which was very nice considering that track and field was his first sport and while his forte were jumps he was also decent with javelin. Much too much power behind his throws at that point.</p><p></p><p>But I digress. My point was, that as difficult as it is, and it gets more difficult the older they get, I have found it better to avoid too big consequences, taking everything off and situations or rules there it is possible or even easy to up the looming consequence quickly and even to the ridiculous degree. With mine it also felt that all those circular and stake upping arguments only made difficult child to dug his heels deeper and be more stubborn and inflexible. My better parenting moments were the ones when I was able to cut the argument (maybe making it silly, or diverting his attention to something else or simply by not getting myself get involved) short and give him time to work out the situation. Those were the times when he seemed to slowly learn to take in other point of views and be more flexible and reasonable with things. Still, if there is something I know is difficult for him, I try to do my best to avoid arguing and just introduce my point and give him time to think it through.</p><p></p><p>How often I'm able to do that is of course another story. But when I can, it almost always goes better in the end.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SuZir, post: 585080, member: 14557"] That rule we had too. Though we only took things temporarily. After all, we could come up with nicer things to do with our time than go to work and earn money so we could buy ourselves closets full of toys to keep confiscated. So flying toys were confiscated only for certain time. First for an hour, then a day, then a week and in the end for a month. Then he braked that habit in his earlish teens, which was very nice considering that track and field was his first sport and while his forte were jumps he was also decent with javelin. Much too much power behind his throws at that point. But I digress. My point was, that as difficult as it is, and it gets more difficult the older they get, I have found it better to avoid too big consequences, taking everything off and situations or rules there it is possible or even easy to up the looming consequence quickly and even to the ridiculous degree. With mine it also felt that all those circular and stake upping arguments only made difficult child to dug his heels deeper and be more stubborn and inflexible. My better parenting moments were the ones when I was able to cut the argument (maybe making it silly, or diverting his attention to something else or simply by not getting myself get involved) short and give him time to work out the situation. Those were the times when he seemed to slowly learn to take in other point of views and be more flexible and reasonable with things. Still, if there is something I know is difficult for him, I try to do my best to avoid arguing and just introduce my point and give him time to think it through. How often I'm able to do that is of course another story. But when I can, it almost always goes better in the end. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
not so fun night...
Top