Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
Not sure what to do....
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="New Leaf" data-source="post: 685501" data-attributes="member: 19522"><p>Hi Struggling welcome to the forum. I am sorry for your need to be here, from your description it has been a long hard road for you dealing with your son's choices. If you would like to, please add some general information to your signature, then others will have a better idea of your situation, age of your son,etc.</p><p> Ouch. This is very rough. I am so sorry.</p><p>The difficult part in all of this is the fact that we cannot decide for another person what they need to do. If the choice is to use drugs, be homeless, it is their choice. We struggle and grieve over their choices, worry for their future, but all of this does not one thing for our beloveds. We end up taking on all of the concerns, being consumed with worry over their lifestyle. As long as we do this, they do not have to. The only way we all learn as humans is to feel the consequences of our choices.</p><p>It is hard Struggling, I feel for you and know the pain of this. But you sacrificing yourself will not save your son. I have come to the conclusion that the best way to help our d cs, is to show by example, how to live well. It is what our kids have looked to us for, from the beginning.</p><p>The best advice I received here is to slow.....way.....down. Observing our d cs going into tailspin after tailspin, creates a panic within and we feel that we have to do something, anything, right this minute.</p><p>Take some time to breathe and to rebuild yourself.</p><p>We cannot do much of anything if we are beaten down ourselves.</p><p>There is a good article on detachment in the PE forum, linked below</p><p><a href="http://www.conductdisorders.com/community/threads/article-on-detachment.53639/" target="_blank">http://www.conductdisorders.com/community/threads/article-on-detachment.53639/</a></p><p></p><p>Many here have found help dealing with this by going to alanon, naranon, or seeing a counselor. I went to therapy to try to get my head on straight. I had been through so much with my two, I could hardly think. I was swallowed up.</p><p></p><p>This is a battle, and you are a warrior, even soldiers need R&R. If you can, try to step back a bit. When in the trenches of this, everything is so right up in our face. It is good to step back. </p><p></p><p>When we are so involved, trying desperately to help, we lose all sight of ourselves.</p><p></p><p>Be very kind and gentle with yourself. You have value, you matter.</p><p></p><p>Take care and know you are not alone.</p><p>Please keep posting and let us know how you are doing.</p><p>(((HUGS)))</p><p>leafy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="New Leaf, post: 685501, member: 19522"] Hi Struggling welcome to the forum. I am sorry for your need to be here, from your description it has been a long hard road for you dealing with your son's choices. If you would like to, please add some general information to your signature, then others will have a better idea of your situation, age of your son,etc. Ouch. This is very rough. I am so sorry. The difficult part in all of this is the fact that we cannot decide for another person what they need to do. If the choice is to use drugs, be homeless, it is their choice. We struggle and grieve over their choices, worry for their future, but all of this does not one thing for our beloveds. We end up taking on all of the concerns, being consumed with worry over their lifestyle. As long as we do this, they do not have to. The only way we all learn as humans is to feel the consequences of our choices. It is hard Struggling, I feel for you and know the pain of this. But you sacrificing yourself will not save your son. I have come to the conclusion that the best way to help our d cs, is to show by example, how to live well. It is what our kids have looked to us for, from the beginning. The best advice I received here is to slow.....way.....down. Observing our d cs going into tailspin after tailspin, creates a panic within and we feel that we have to do something, anything, right this minute. Take some time to breathe and to rebuild yourself. We cannot do much of anything if we are beaten down ourselves. There is a good article on detachment in the PE forum, linked below [URL]http://www.conductdisorders.com/community/threads/article-on-detachment.53639/[/URL] Many here have found help dealing with this by going to alanon, naranon, or seeing a counselor. I went to therapy to try to get my head on straight. I had been through so much with my two, I could hardly think. I was swallowed up. This is a battle, and you are a warrior, even soldiers need R&R. If you can, try to step back a bit. When in the trenches of this, everything is so right up in our face. It is good to step back. When we are so involved, trying desperately to help, we lose all sight of ourselves. Be very kind and gentle with yourself. You have value, you matter. Take care and know you are not alone. Please keep posting and let us know how you are doing. (((HUGS))) leafy [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
Not sure what to do....
Top