In the archives you will find sample letters to use to request comprehensive testing from the school. What the school world sees as comprehensive is VERY different than what the rest of the world sees as comprehensive because school looks only/mostly at how things impact his life at school, NOT his life overall. So you need to supplement by getting neuropsychologist testing done privately in addition to the school testing. You also need occupational therapy testing for sensory issues and other Occupational Therapist (OT) related problems as these can be severe but you might not even know it.
One thing that MANY if not most of our kids have is some degree of sensory integration disorder. This means their brains do not handle sensory input the way a normally wired brain handles it. They seek or avoid various types of sensory input which can include types of movement, sound, tastes, textures etc... I think my kids had an easier time learning to deal with their sensory issues because I have sensory issues that can be quite severe and I 'get' what they are feeling to a greater degree than the parents of many of their friends.
You can do a LOT to help the sensory issues by understanding them and learning the different types of therapies that help. One amazing and low tech/cheap therapy is known to actually rewire how the brain handles sensory input. It is called brushing and uses a soft brush over the body in a certain pattern followed by gentle joint compressions. It MUST be taught to you by a qualified Occupational Therapist (OT) because if you do it incorrectly you can create HUGE problems. I have found that working on and understanding the sensory issues can make a LOT of the problems better. It is easier to handle problems and unexpected things if your every nerve is not already on edge because you cannot cope with some sensory stimuli or need some sensory stimuli to cope and cannot have it. If those needs are met, it is far easier to handle the day to day stresses that every one of us experiences. I know firsthand because of my sensory issues. If I am wearing something itchy, I am grumpy and mean and NOTHING is good in my world. I cannot cope even one tiny bit. Never could and I have tried and tried over the years. By understanding this, it made me more able to understand my kids' issues. Lots of the research says that after age ten or twelve the brushing won't help much. I beg to differ as I personally felt substantial differences after using the brushing on myself - and I was close to forty, and also my older kids who were ten and fourteen showed significant improvement. Our Occupational Therapist (OT) had not ever tried it on anyone over age eight or nine and was very surprised to note the differences that we all felt. She has started to use it on older kids and is surprised at how it is helping them cope as the research didn't seem to address it, or so she said. You can learn more about sensory integration disorder by reading "The Out Of Sync Child" by Kranowitz.
Another thing that helps with saying no is to be incredibly uber consistent in how you handle it. If you EVER give in after saying no, it will take weeks or months or longer to undo that. Your child will keep pushing past the point where it seems insane because once you gave in after days/weeks/hours/whatever of asking and being told no. If you say no, then no MUST be your answer and you must stick to it if you want the challenges of your 'no' answer to stop.
I often would ask Wiz why he thought my answer would change if I had already said no? By not answering no again, and by not giving in but instead challenging his reasoning behind the pestering for another answer, it got into his mind that no meant no and that mom would not ever give in. I also had a set consequence for pestering me. the fifth time he asked, he got a chore to go do. I ignored the repeated challenges, even the outright fits if possible, and told him that he needed to take out the trash or pick up something or whatever. It was WW3 sometimes, but after making no stick and not giving in and giving chores to do for repeated requests after no was the answer, it did get through. It took months to get to that point, but it did happen. At least with me. My husband would give in if Wiz pestered him long enough, so Wiz never did stop it with husband. I had to let them sort that out because I could not always be there to make my husband be consistent.
One thing that drove me nuts was that Wiz would keep asking even if I said yes. In our home if you asked mom over and over after she says yes, that must mean that you didn't want a yes so the answer changed to no. It got the kids to not keep pestering me even if I said yes, because the third time you ask after I say yes, I say no. It was mind bending to Wiz at first, but he got the idea and it cut down on the incessant requests that drove me batty.
You may get some help by reading some of the Love and Logic parenting books. There are many different titles depending on the age of your child and other factors, but I have had excellent results. You can buy the books at many bookstores, but to learn more about them go to
www.loveandlogic.com. It is very helpful in parenting any child and in my opinion esp a difficult child. The main title is probably "Parenting Your Child with Love and Logic" by Faye and Cline.