Now I Have a Lawyer........

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Hound dog, Nov 1, 2011.

  1. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    I put off closing out husband's bank accts until well as switching the house over ect because......well........because for me that just made his death far too real. It still does, but I no longer have a choice.

    So I gathered the paperwork and contacted the bank he has the accts in (not our normal bank) after an eternity on terminal hold (literally I was hung up on twice and had to call back) I finally get to talk to the manager who said my brilliant husband did not list anyone as beneficiary to the bank accts. So folks a really informed FYI here, if you and your spouse don't share accts....get both names on them or at the very least make certain each other are listed as beneficiaries. Because now I have to pay at least 400.00 for a lawyer to get myself established as executor of husband's estate. The acct is now frozen.......and I can't pay any bills.

    Bank manager recommended a lawyer the banks work with often for this sort of thing. (small town) So......I call the lawyer. She told me the paperwork she needed ect. Oddly enough they don't need my marriage license to prove I'm his wife/widow but they needed all 4 kids names and addresses. This sent me into an anxiety attack solely due to katie. She doesn't know I have husband's retirement money. I don't want her to know as she has no claim to it. So soon as the lawyer told me she had to have all the kids names my heart dropped to the floor. I have no trouble seeing katie attempting to get her hands on some of that money. It's the whole reason she came to hope of getting an inheritance from mother in law.

    Soooo, went in a little nervous. I asked about why they needed the kids names because there was a large chance katie will ignore the letter from them. (or she'll try to snatch some of the money) Lawyer said it's a formality for the court, the kids will receive a form they're to sign making me the executor of husband's estate, which allows me to close those 2 accts, change the house into my name ect. Lawyer said if they don't hear from katie, they'll next send a certified letter. If they don't hear from that then it doesn't matter. They just have to make the attempt to contact her. There will be no issue from my bio kids.

    I explained I've been using the acct to pay bills ect but of course now it's frozen, so asked how long this would take. She said at the most probably a month. But she can get a waver from the judge so I can pay the funeral director........which is what I was trying to do yesterday when we couldn't get the card to work. And here is a funny about small towns......funeral director IS lawyers husband.......AND they were mother in law's next door neighbors for oh about 8 yrs. I used to talk to them all the time when over at mother in law's house. It just didn't click until I heard the lawyers name! lol (which might be why funeral director bent over backward.....other than he's a super nice man to begin with) And lawyer will let me pay her when I can get access to the darn money again.

    Now while having to pay that 400.00 (may be more) also may be a good thing. Something prodded me to ask her about the house insurance we got when we signed the loan papers that the house should be paid in full if one of us died. She said she's used to working with our loan bank over such things and she'll contact them about it. If that policy exists....and she sees no reason why it wouldn't.......she'll make the responsible party pay up. That would be an ENORMOUS relief, and would cut my bills by 450.00 a month!

    So some heavy duty prayers there and board power would be greatly appreciated. It didn't seem to surprise her at all that both loan bank and insurance co are pointing at each other over that policy.

    It can take little as a week as long as katie gets her thing signed and mailed back. I hope it doesn't take a month, I've got a house payment to make and bills to pay. omg

    I'll tell you what, I will so have all this stuff sorted out for my kids down to the nth degree. Actually I've already started. And once this estate stuff is cleared up I'm doing my will with the lawyer. And the good thing about that? All the stuff that came from mother in law when she passed.........actually came to ME, not husband, was stated so in HER will so that katie couldn't lay claim to anything even in the future. It was willed to ME to give to MY 3 bio kids and perhaps katie's children if they grow into responsible adults. Smart lady mother in law. lol As this just hit me why she did it that way this morning. (I always wondered) Katie being my step child gave her that option she would not have normally had.

    I will not leave my kids such a mess to figure out and clean up. And when I switch the house and loan over to my name only, I'm going to see if I can get that insurance that pays it off if I should die........if somehow the other got dropped, which I don't think it did. Bills will be organized. All house, car, ect paperwork will be organized ect and all kept in my two desks where it can easily be found.

    I am soooooooo not looking forward to taxes this year. I'm going to have to ask the lawyer about that as well.:sigh:
  2. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    OMG *Now I Have a LAWYER* not a layer...................:rofl:
  3. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not

    LOL! Yes - I wondered what "layer" you had found while excavating the hoard. Maybe the "underpants layer" or the "old shoes layer"....???

    But a lawyer sounds good! Crossing fingers that katie doesn't mess it up...
  4. buddy

    buddy New Member

    I thought it was a good joke!

    Ok so a good and absolutely praying that the policy exists so the house will be paid up! Yipee for that, please please! Good for you taking such huge steps. I know it probably was a kick in the gut to not have the card work. That sinking feeling that something is really wrong but in the end this may be a good thing. Especially if it only takes a month.

    Sounds like mother in law was a wise woman.

    Hoping and praying for you! hugs, Dee
  5. DazedandConfused

    DazedandConfused Active Member

    Fingers crossed that the insurance to pay off the house is still valid.
  6. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    You know I'm praying too.

    And - FWIW - since you've already been in contact with the bank about the mtg insurance - call and ask if you can defer a house payment due to accounts being frozen. I'd bet, if the payments have all been made to this point, they'll work with you. I was able to do this once with my car.
  7. buddy

    buddy New Member

    dazed and confused..LOVE SNL! Do you ever watch his stuff on look for the one with Pearl the landlord...where's the rent. It is So funny (if you like toddlers playing adults and if you have a sick sense of humor)

    sorry to but in and be off topic, just noticed the avatar and laughed out loud remembering...

    step that is a great idea.... that's why I really have learned to love this place
  8. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Taxes... probably need an accountant rather than a lawyer... but the lawyer may know of someone who does final returns (at least, that's what they are called here... the tax return where all the tax stuff gets wrapped up)
  9. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    I was wondering if you got chickens...

    I hope Katie isn't a butt about this all. Praying praying praying!
  10. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    If I could get chickens I would. I don't think they'd allow them inside city limits.

    Now here is a coincidence that is a bit strange...........

    Not only is my new lawyer married to the funeral director and were both my mother in law's neighbors for years.........

    Turns out she was the lawyer for the house signing as well.

    Travis just went out and found, actually walked right to it and got it out, all the house paperwork.....such as the original papers from the signing, loan, insurance ect, plus car titles and titles to the house. His memory sometimes works like mine. He'd remembered seeing it, just couldn't recall where. It hit him out of the blue today and sure enough there they were in an old rusty file cabinet in the family room.

    So I can take those to the lawyer tomorrow. :)

    But all these coincidences are starting to make me wonder........ Especially since I don't believe in coincidences. hmmm
  11. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    Don't look a gift horse in the mouth and all that, right? Someone's gotta look after you sometimes. ;)
  12. mstang67chic

    mstang67chic Going Green

    Here's hopting that everything goes quickly, well and wayyy under Katie's radar.

    As for the "layer"....Um...yeah, leaving that one alone. :bigsmile:

    And chickens? Can't hurt to try. They would have your backyard cleaned out in no time flat. Seriously.
  13. donna723

    donna723 Well-Known Member

    Any chance you could just take the paperwork over to Katie's apartment, hand her a pen, and tell her to sign it?
  14. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    Did he leave a will at all? I thought in most states not leaving one automatically left everything to the surviving spouse, or if there wasn't one, to the children equally.
  15. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I think the lawyer will be worth the $$ you pay her. Glad Travis found the paperwork - the lawyer will charge a lot less with it in hand than she would have to if she had to track it down.

    I hope that Katie isn't a jerk about this and if she is that things in her life get REALLY complicated and she doesn't have time to make trouble.

    I am VERY glad things seem to be different in OH now. Back when my gpa died, late 60's, if you died with-o a will your estate was divided half to your spouse and half between your kids. My Gma had to go to court 2x/yr to prove she had not squandered my aunt's part of the estate. Gma also had to petition for custody of my aunt even though she was the biological mother - and every year had to prove she was a "fit" guardian of her own biological child. It was crazy and very traumatic and expensive. So I am glad that seems to have changed.

    Many hugs, I hope this all is over with smoothly.
  16. buddy

    buddy New Member

    hmmm is right....someone up there helping out??? very sweet thought.
  17. Liahona

    Liahona Guest

    Glad the paperwork was found. That must be a huge relief.
  18. keista

    keista New Member

    Glad that paperwork was found!

    No I only have to pray, pretzel and rattle beads to keep Katie compliant. Worst case scenario, she can try to become executor herself, but with you and the three others against that idea, it just won't be happening.

    IF she starts making a stink, I'd have no problem letting her believe that if she signs, that something will be coming her way. *wink*
  19. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    Actually, do look a gift horse in the mouth these days...cause the price of the horse isn't what's expensive. LOL


    Sounds to me like you have a little help. :)
  20. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    It is a huge relief that it was found. And yeah, sort of wondering if we had some help from the other side as I've never seen so many things click and fit together like I did today. If so, I'm grateful, I'm sure as heck not complaining about it.

    Lawyer made it sound as if katie is not being told of any funds in the acct, actually legally she's not privy to such info, and as far as she knows I'm flat broke and living off my stockpile. Plus, that money is husband's retirement, which I AM beneficiary to, and I can soooo prove that in a court easily enough.

    And yeah, if she did try anything........well, we'll just say we're not a family to go to war with. We band together like glue and come out swinging, and thanks to my Mom I know every dirty trick in the book and then some. Only in her case it wouldn't really be dirty as she and M did it to themselves.

    But I'd rather skip that war and have everything fall into place for once so I can just move forward. That alone is painful enough. In all honesty, I'm hoping that a lawyer here in town sending her a letter scares the crud outta her so she ignores it or whatever. ugh