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<blockquote data-quote="Nancy" data-source="post: 541370" data-attributes="member: 59"><p>I swear our difficult child's have a manual they read and follow on how to do this. My difficult child got another tatoo while she was int he sober house too. And we were paying her rent there and giving her a small amount of spending money. Her excuse was that it only cost $40. I don't care of it was a penny. The point was she violated the rules and instead of putting her efforts into recovery she was out getting another tatoo. I was livid. She too owed us a lot of money for court fines and school expenses and treatment center expenses andd this was what she did with the money we gave her.</p><p></p><p>We also got a call from the sober house when we were on our 13 hour drive for vacation asking us if we spent the day with difficult child the day before at the baseball game. Uh no we were not even in that state yesterday. So she got restricted and lost privileges and two weeks later she walked out of there.</p><p></p><p>That told me that she was not serious about recovery. She was not doing the work she needed to be doing to stay sober. The other women in there were working the steps and calling their sponsors and actively working recovery and difficult child was trying to figure out how she could get her next tatoo or have a day with some guy in the sun under the guise that she was with us. We found out two months later that she was pregnant. Must have been a really productive day. I should have known at the time that she was not ready to be sober and that she was just going through the motions.</p><p></p><p>I hope this was just a temporary misjudgement call on your difficult child's part. But I think you also have to be prepared for more of this because our difficult child's seem to have to push the envelope and back themselevs into a corner just to prove they are in charge. I also think that our difficult child's are addicted to more than just alcohol or drugs and so when they cant get that they go to whatever else is out there. I read that tatoos can be very addicting, they get the rush of drugs from the sensation of getting the tatoo. My difficult child will probably be covered in tatoos at some point.</p><p></p><p>Nancy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nancy, post: 541370, member: 59"] I swear our difficult child's have a manual they read and follow on how to do this. My difficult child got another tatoo while she was int he sober house too. And we were paying her rent there and giving her a small amount of spending money. Her excuse was that it only cost $40. I don't care of it was a penny. The point was she violated the rules and instead of putting her efforts into recovery she was out getting another tatoo. I was livid. She too owed us a lot of money for court fines and school expenses and treatment center expenses andd this was what she did with the money we gave her. We also got a call from the sober house when we were on our 13 hour drive for vacation asking us if we spent the day with difficult child the day before at the baseball game. Uh no we were not even in that state yesterday. So she got restricted and lost privileges and two weeks later she walked out of there. That told me that she was not serious about recovery. She was not doing the work she needed to be doing to stay sober. The other women in there were working the steps and calling their sponsors and actively working recovery and difficult child was trying to figure out how she could get her next tatoo or have a day with some guy in the sun under the guise that she was with us. We found out two months later that she was pregnant. Must have been a really productive day. I should have known at the time that she was not ready to be sober and that she was just going through the motions. I hope this was just a temporary misjudgement call on your difficult child's part. But I think you also have to be prepared for more of this because our difficult child's seem to have to push the envelope and back themselevs into a corner just to prove they are in charge. I also think that our difficult child's are addicted to more than just alcohol or drugs and so when they cant get that they go to whatever else is out there. I read that tatoos can be very addicting, they get the rush of drugs from the sensation of getting the tatoo. My difficult child will probably be covered in tatoos at some point. Nancy [/QUOTE]
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