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Now that I kicked my 18 year old daughter out, where do I go from here?
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 709127" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>I think I might speak with somebody at the Domestic Violence program to find out how to handle this. It could be that leaving it open ended, with the possibility that you might accept him (a cold day in hell) would be in her best interests. I would not promise, because that would clearly be a falsehood. I might also speak with the police. They will have an officer who deals with domestic violence. Speaking in general you could ask the officer how to proceed.</p><p> This is concerning. He sounds like a troubled person. I would want her away from him as soon as it could be managed.</p><p></p><p>I might even consider going to the restaurant if you believe really it would expedite her coming home. You would not be giving consent or approval. You would basically be opening the door for her return. Nothing more. If it was me I would speak to the police who works with domestic violence and ask what to do.</p><p>This concerns me, too. I am glad you have opened communication with her. There is the possibility that she wants to confide about the ways she has been compromised or hurt, or could she be pregnant?</p><p></p><p>This is a worrisome situation, I agree. You are doing everything right. It is a question of accelerating her return, and minimizing the potential to her of harm. I might do whatever it took, to get her back, that is sanctioned by the domestic violence people and the police. She might not even be safe from him, if she leaves his home. He might stalk her. That is a possibility. He may be gaining control over her, by telling her that he could hurt others she loves. You do not know. They have safe houses for women involved with men of this type. That is something to talk about with the DV program. Do we know if this guy has a record of this type of behavior with other women? Is this something that you would want to check out? Would it help you to know how to proceed?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 709127, member: 18958"] I think I might speak with somebody at the Domestic Violence program to find out how to handle this. It could be that leaving it open ended, with the possibility that you might accept him (a cold day in hell) would be in her best interests. I would not promise, because that would clearly be a falsehood. I might also speak with the police. They will have an officer who deals with domestic violence. Speaking in general you could ask the officer how to proceed. This is concerning. He sounds like a troubled person. I would want her away from him as soon as it could be managed. I might even consider going to the restaurant if you believe really it would expedite her coming home. You would not be giving consent or approval. You would basically be opening the door for her return. Nothing more. If it was me I would speak to the police who works with domestic violence and ask what to do. This concerns me, too. I am glad you have opened communication with her. There is the possibility that she wants to confide about the ways she has been compromised or hurt, or could she be pregnant? This is a worrisome situation, I agree. You are doing everything right. It is a question of accelerating her return, and minimizing the potential to her of harm. I might do whatever it took, to get her back, that is sanctioned by the domestic violence people and the police. She might not even be safe from him, if she leaves his home. He might stalk her. That is a possibility. He may be gaining control over her, by telling her that he could hurt others she loves. You do not know. They have safe houses for women involved with men of this type. That is something to talk about with the DV program. Do we know if this guy has a record of this type of behavior with other women? Is this something that you would want to check out? Would it help you to know how to proceed? [/QUOTE]
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Now that I kicked my 18 year old daughter out, where do I go from here?
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