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<blockquote data-quote="pepperidge" data-source="post: 486307" data-attributes="member: 2322"><p>Malika,</p><p></p><p>it seems like you want a definitive diagnosis. But for many of us, there is no definitive diagnosis as this whole medical/behavioral thing is a major can of worms. Your son sounds like he has impulse control and issues of self regulation. You will never probably know why--whether it is fetal alcohol, his wiring or whatever. If he can maintain reasonably well, then you probably don't need medications right now, but one day as his peers progress and his developmentally slower or school demands increase he may. You can deal with that when the time comes. Right now what he seems to need is a reasonably caring environment that doesn't punish him every time he can't behave the way other kids might be able to. Yes, teach him to control impulses and regulate himself, but not in a punitive way. </p><p></p><p>It sounds like you are searching for a magic bullet or a magic diagnosis that will unlock everything. Mostly what many parents on this website have learned is that it is just one foot in front of the other, deal with the issues as they arise, and try to get help for the issues at hand. As he gets older you may see things more clearly. But right now he needs a loving environment that helps to socialize him appropriately and you seem to have that where you are, albeit with some issues. </p><p></p><p>Sorry, this might sound harsh, I don't mean it that way. Part of what we learn is to tolerate ambiguity, lack of clarity, trial and error approaches to our kids problems. It would be nice to find the magic approach or medication or whatever, but I suspect that many of us are still looking and probably will be for time to come...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="pepperidge, post: 486307, member: 2322"] Malika, it seems like you want a definitive diagnosis. But for many of us, there is no definitive diagnosis as this whole medical/behavioral thing is a major can of worms. Your son sounds like he has impulse control and issues of self regulation. You will never probably know why--whether it is fetal alcohol, his wiring or whatever. If he can maintain reasonably well, then you probably don't need medications right now, but one day as his peers progress and his developmentally slower or school demands increase he may. You can deal with that when the time comes. Right now what he seems to need is a reasonably caring environment that doesn't punish him every time he can't behave the way other kids might be able to. Yes, teach him to control impulses and regulate himself, but not in a punitive way. It sounds like you are searching for a magic bullet or a magic diagnosis that will unlock everything. Mostly what many parents on this website have learned is that it is just one foot in front of the other, deal with the issues as they arise, and try to get help for the issues at hand. As he gets older you may see things more clearly. But right now he needs a loving environment that helps to socialize him appropriately and you seem to have that where you are, albeit with some issues. Sorry, this might sound harsh, I don't mean it that way. Part of what we learn is to tolerate ambiguity, lack of clarity, trial and error approaches to our kids problems. It would be nice to find the magic approach or medication or whatever, but I suspect that many of us are still looking and probably will be for time to come... [/QUOTE]
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