Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Oh boy
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Malika" data-source="post: 468951" data-attributes="member: 11227"><p>Thank you for this support. In moments like this, it feels valuable indeed! </p><p>I feel like... there are two things going on here. J's "stuff" and my "stuff" - past traumatic experience of mine which is set off by J being unacceptably rude and disrespectful in his way of talking to me (not a constant occurence). This is the real trigger for me. I got angry and behaved in a way that was not acceptable to me. Or good for him. And I know that I scared him. It is an odd coincidence of fate that I should be given this particular child to raise because on the face of it it seems all wrong... but I did not "choose" this. I did not know. I am not beating myself up, being hard on myself when I say I feel I need deeper and greater support with this, some form of counselling that is actually to do with my stuff and not to do with J at all. </p><p>I don't think J is on the autism spectrum. And have been told by a woman who worked with autistic kids that he is definitely not. But I guess we have to remember that many of these behaviour overlap and reproduce each other... </p><p>At the moment J is four and very cute and sweet much of the time. With increasing age, he is going to be less cute and sweet and the disrespectful, insulting talk is going to be more and more problematic - for him and others. If I had a child psychiatrist who was half way decent, I could talk about this but really seeing someone who is always rushed and overloaded once every two months who just delivers platitudes that I already know (in a very pleasant way) is not really helping either of us. </p><p>Thanks for listening... <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Malika, post: 468951, member: 11227"] Thank you for this support. In moments like this, it feels valuable indeed! I feel like... there are two things going on here. J's "stuff" and my "stuff" - past traumatic experience of mine which is set off by J being unacceptably rude and disrespectful in his way of talking to me (not a constant occurence). This is the real trigger for me. I got angry and behaved in a way that was not acceptable to me. Or good for him. And I know that I scared him. It is an odd coincidence of fate that I should be given this particular child to raise because on the face of it it seems all wrong... but I did not "choose" this. I did not know. I am not beating myself up, being hard on myself when I say I feel I need deeper and greater support with this, some form of counselling that is actually to do with my stuff and not to do with J at all. I don't think J is on the autism spectrum. And have been told by a woman who worked with autistic kids that he is definitely not. But I guess we have to remember that many of these behaviour overlap and reproduce each other... At the moment J is four and very cute and sweet much of the time. With increasing age, he is going to be less cute and sweet and the disrespectful, insulting talk is going to be more and more problematic - for him and others. If I had a child psychiatrist who was half way decent, I could talk about this but really seeing someone who is always rushed and overloaded once every two months who just delivers platitudes that I already know (in a very pleasant way) is not really helping either of us. Thanks for listening... :) [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Oh boy
Top