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Substance Abuse
Ok Mikey, Time for an Update
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<blockquote data-quote="Mikey" data-source="post: 42897" data-attributes="member: 3579"><p>SunnyFla: I'm trying, and difficult child was interested at first (even if just "for the money"). He had an initial phone interview set up with the head research person for 7pm yesterday, but skipped out at 6:30 (while we were at a banquet for our daughter). Don't know if she called him on his cell phone or not since we had another "episode" last night.</p><p></p><p>We get home, difficult child isn't anywhere to be found. wife calls him on his phone and he says he's "at XXX's house" (his one pothead friend that he has left, who mooches car rides from him). wife asked him to stay sober. I can only guess how the conversation went because I only heard her speaking. It went from "please don't get stoned" to "I don't care if you're home on time, I don't want you getting stoned", to "the only reason you EVER go over to XXX's house is to get stoned"... This went on for about 5 minutes more.</p><p></p><p>wife finally said "It's Mother's Day weekend, and the only thing I want from you is for you to stay sober for two days. Will you do that for me?". Next, I hear her saying "So what you're telling me is that you won't do this one thing for me, even though you've been stoned 4 of the last seven days, and this is all I want from you?". Next thing I know, she hangs up the phone, throws it across the room, and starts crying.</p><p></p><p>I'm watching all this, and my heart is breaking for her. </p><p></p><p>I got in my car and went to all of his pothead hangouts looking for him (what a surprise, he wasn't where he said he was). Maybe it's a good thing I didn't find him because at that time, I don't know what would have happened if I'd found him. About an hour later, I get a call from wife saying she's had enough, and she's going to bed (other son was at a concert until late, and daugher was sleeping over). So I came home to a quiet, very sad house.</p><p></p><p>Of course, difficult child wasn't answering his phone, wouldn't respond to text messages, and had simply disappeared into the night. I was fully expecting him to be gone for a while (at least overnight), and didn't want to be by myself with the way I was feeling so I went over to talk with my neighbor. </p><p></p><p>He's been through hell and back; was a major druggie, dealt drugs, and finally came out of it clean after losing everything he had (including his family). His son was murdered last year as well. He's a nice man, has pretty much had everything crappy life has to offer thrown at him, and has somehow found his way through it all. We talked for about an hour, and when I'd finally vented enough to be back in control I walked back to my house (around 10:30). </p><p></p><p>To my surprise I found that difficult child was already home, in bed, asleep. Don't know if he was stoned or not, and haven't spoken to him all day (he left for work and the only time we crossed paths was when I gave him his morning medications).</p><p></p><p>I don't know what tonight holds, nor do I know what kind of Mother's Day my dear wife will have tomorrow because of the evil stranger my son has morphed into. The only thing I do know is that my son is incapable of showing any empathy for anyone, and will use just about anything we do as an excuse to rebel and act out.</p><p></p><p>I'm getting resigned the fact that tomorrow may be the first Mother's Day my wife has where she feels she only has one son. I could be wrong, but I don't think so.</p><p></p><p>Mikey</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Mikey, post: 42897, member: 3579"] SunnyFla: I'm trying, and difficult child was interested at first (even if just "for the money"). He had an initial phone interview set up with the head research person for 7pm yesterday, but skipped out at 6:30 (while we were at a banquet for our daughter). Don't know if she called him on his cell phone or not since we had another "episode" last night. We get home, difficult child isn't anywhere to be found. wife calls him on his phone and he says he's "at XXX's house" (his one pothead friend that he has left, who mooches car rides from him). wife asked him to stay sober. I can only guess how the conversation went because I only heard her speaking. It went from "please don't get stoned" to "I don't care if you're home on time, I don't want you getting stoned", to "the only reason you EVER go over to XXX's house is to get stoned"... This went on for about 5 minutes more. wife finally said "It's Mother's Day weekend, and the only thing I want from you is for you to stay sober for two days. Will you do that for me?". Next, I hear her saying "So what you're telling me is that you won't do this one thing for me, even though you've been stoned 4 of the last seven days, and this is all I want from you?". Next thing I know, she hangs up the phone, throws it across the room, and starts crying. I'm watching all this, and my heart is breaking for her. I got in my car and went to all of his pothead hangouts looking for him (what a surprise, he wasn't where he said he was). Maybe it's a good thing I didn't find him because at that time, I don't know what would have happened if I'd found him. About an hour later, I get a call from wife saying she's had enough, and she's going to bed (other son was at a concert until late, and daugher was sleeping over). So I came home to a quiet, very sad house. Of course, difficult child wasn't answering his phone, wouldn't respond to text messages, and had simply disappeared into the night. I was fully expecting him to be gone for a while (at least overnight), and didn't want to be by myself with the way I was feeling so I went over to talk with my neighbor. He's been through hell and back; was a major druggie, dealt drugs, and finally came out of it clean after losing everything he had (including his family). His son was murdered last year as well. He's a nice man, has pretty much had everything crappy life has to offer thrown at him, and has somehow found his way through it all. We talked for about an hour, and when I'd finally vented enough to be back in control I walked back to my house (around 10:30). To my surprise I found that difficult child was already home, in bed, asleep. Don't know if he was stoned or not, and haven't spoken to him all day (he left for work and the only time we crossed paths was when I gave him his morning medications). I don't know what tonight holds, nor do I know what kind of Mother's Day my dear wife will have tomorrow because of the evil stranger my son has morphed into. The only thing I do know is that my son is incapable of showing any empathy for anyone, and will use just about anything we do as an excuse to rebel and act out. I'm getting resigned the fact that tomorrow may be the first Mother's Day my wife has where she feels she only has one son. I could be wrong, but I don't think so. Mikey [/QUOTE]
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