As you can tell from the thread I deleted earlier...I found some things that made me really, really frantic...
I have been aware that difficult child has been "sniffing around" some much older guys the last few weeks- but I didn't have much more than my tingling Mommy-senses to go on. You may remember, we have a "Web Watcher" program on our computer...well, I checked it today and discovered a whole IM conversation between difficult child and a twenty-something in which they discuss her age, the legal implications of their dating and/or having sex AND in which difficult child assures him that she can arrange a plan for the two of them to sneak around without being caught by parents.
His response to her planning was 'Me Likey".
(Did you feel your stomache lurch? Yea, me too...)
My initial reaction was one of helplessness - I don't have the slightest idea of who this guy is or where they might have met. All I had was the Facebook name.
Then it dawned on me that the printed messages might be enough to be considered "Soliciting a Minor". I looked up the penal code for this area... Sure enough - a Felony.
Did I really want to go this route? Pretty serious accusation...
I decided to at least go talk with police and see what they said. husband and I were not interested in getting anyone branded a sex-offender..but maybe police could give this guy a good stern warning?
I talked to an officer who didn't have much advice - other than keep difficult child of the computer. He passed my papers on to an investigator...who is supposed to get back to me tomorrow.
Meanwhile, husband was absolutely FUMING!!! And he wanted to confront difficult child - which you KNOW was just going to be an ugly scene, no matter what. I can't handle these violent outburts any more...they just scare the koi out of me!
So when husband got home from work - I took DS and ran some errands. I had to get out of there...
husband tells me it wasn't too bad. He kept his voice very calm and he told her right up front that she needed to consider her reaction, because if she got even the slightest bit out of control he was calling the cops.
So her contronted her. Told her she was grounded. Banned her from the compuer. Cancelled her FB account and changed all of the passwords.
She tried to argue that she needs the computer for schoolwork.
He told her "Tough".
So difficult child is furious...and not the slightest bit sorry...she is only sorry she got caught.
She claims that she met this guy through another friend and suspected that he might be a pedophile...so she was messaging him in order to lure him into a trap so that he would get arrested and go to jail.
And now that we've notified police - she hopes he is SOOO angry that he comes over here and kills us all.
So that was the worst of it so far...
I don't know what the ramifications of the police investigation will be. I don't know this 20-something at all...
Yes, he should have known better,
but...
I don't know if I over-reacted...
I'm still upset...
And I forwarded all the info to our caseworker...
I think I am going to BEG them for Residential Treatment Center (RTC) placement at the TSP meeting in a few weeks.
If I don't have a stroke before then...
I have been aware that difficult child has been "sniffing around" some much older guys the last few weeks- but I didn't have much more than my tingling Mommy-senses to go on. You may remember, we have a "Web Watcher" program on our computer...well, I checked it today and discovered a whole IM conversation between difficult child and a twenty-something in which they discuss her age, the legal implications of their dating and/or having sex AND in which difficult child assures him that she can arrange a plan for the two of them to sneak around without being caught by parents.
His response to her planning was 'Me Likey".
(Did you feel your stomache lurch? Yea, me too...)
My initial reaction was one of helplessness - I don't have the slightest idea of who this guy is or where they might have met. All I had was the Facebook name.
Then it dawned on me that the printed messages might be enough to be considered "Soliciting a Minor". I looked up the penal code for this area... Sure enough - a Felony.
Did I really want to go this route? Pretty serious accusation...
I decided to at least go talk with police and see what they said. husband and I were not interested in getting anyone branded a sex-offender..but maybe police could give this guy a good stern warning?
I talked to an officer who didn't have much advice - other than keep difficult child of the computer. He passed my papers on to an investigator...who is supposed to get back to me tomorrow.
Meanwhile, husband was absolutely FUMING!!! And he wanted to confront difficult child - which you KNOW was just going to be an ugly scene, no matter what. I can't handle these violent outburts any more...they just scare the koi out of me!
So when husband got home from work - I took DS and ran some errands. I had to get out of there...
husband tells me it wasn't too bad. He kept his voice very calm and he told her right up front that she needed to consider her reaction, because if she got even the slightest bit out of control he was calling the cops.
So her contronted her. Told her she was grounded. Banned her from the compuer. Cancelled her FB account and changed all of the passwords.
She tried to argue that she needs the computer for schoolwork.
He told her "Tough".
So difficult child is furious...and not the slightest bit sorry...she is only sorry she got caught.
She claims that she met this guy through another friend and suspected that he might be a pedophile...so she was messaging him in order to lure him into a trap so that he would get arrested and go to jail.
And now that we've notified police - she hopes he is SOOO angry that he comes over here and kills us all.
So that was the worst of it so far...
I don't know what the ramifications of the police investigation will be. I don't know this 20-something at all...
Yes, he should have known better,
but...
I don't know if I over-reacted...
I'm still upset...
And I forwarded all the info to our caseworker...
I think I am going to BEG them for Residential Treatment Center (RTC) placement at the TSP meeting in a few weeks.
If I don't have a stroke before then...