Ok, wise friends. If I know somebody's teen is suicidal, what do I do?

[DammitJanet]

How does one know he doesnt have a plan. He has said he has thought about suicide. He has said he is depressed. He has said he has no one to live for except Jumper.

Im sorry but if someone said that on this board, we would be giving them the advice to contact the local suicide prevention center, 911, mental health, their psychiatrist, therapist or someone else who could help them. We would not attempt to help them ourselves or sit back and wait and see if college fixes it.

 

[InsaneCdn]

This is one of the links we used when trying to assess how serious the situation was and whether/when to call for help:

Suicide Prevention: Spotting the Signs and Helping a Suicidal Person

 

[klmno]

What if Jumper went to J and told him that she is really concerned about him and cares a lot so she wants him to find someone appropriate to talk to about this and if he doesn't, she feels she has no option but to tell a guidance counselor or someone who can help him more than she can? That way, she isn't betraying him, she's letting him know she cares, she is encouraging him to get help, but letting him know that if he doesn't, she can't carry the responsibility of keeping a secret like this and cares too much about him tto take that risk on his behalf.

It isn't just that it could/would be stressful for Jumper to be J's emotional lifeline, in my humble opinion, it would be encouraging codependency to allow it. What DDD said before about this made a lot of sense to me. Jumper doesn't need her first girlfriend/boyfriend relationship to be emotional dependency because it could leave her with that tendency or doG forbid, thinking that is the norm.

 

[Andy]

What a large issue for a 15 year old to be working on. I was going to suggest that she offer to accompany J to the school counselor's office but since she is so young, I would suggest that she ask him to meet with you and then you can offer to accompany him if he wishes. If he is not open to going on his own or with you, maybe he is open to giving you permission to go for him.

I think the concern coming from you would be taken more serious by the counselor then by coming from a 15 year old girlfriend.

Is he in college now or planning for next Fall?

 

[BusynMember]

Those are all good ideas. I hope to try to gain his trust...and feel I'm making progress.