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OMG! Article on Parent Abuse by teen/adult children
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<blockquote data-quote="scent of cedar" data-source="post: 610144" data-attributes="member: 1721"><p>You've given me so much to think about, MWM. I never did see anything either of my kids did as abusive. But when you look at this in a different light, all of it was abusive. And I've been feeding right into it.</p><p></p><p>Susiestar, I agree with you, about the shame, about the guilt, about the judgment from neighbors and friends and most especially, from family. And here is the thing: I am judging myself and husband just as harshly. Which is exactly what happens in every abusive relationship. The abused person feels responsible for the abuser's behaviors and emotional reality. </p><p></p><p>Wow. </p><p></p><p>Paradigm shift.</p><p></p><p>I need to think about this. Especially given that drug use is involved in almost every case ~ and was the defining factor, with difficult child son. WHAT IF IT WAS ALWAYS THE DRUG USE? We always looked at that as a peripheral issue, or as something we were responsible for, too...but what if drug use is what happened? In retrospect, I think difficult child daughter may always have struggled ~ with tics, with Tourette's, with night terrors. But difficult child son? Drugs, all the way.</p><p></p><p>Cedar</p><p></p><p>I am always posting about difficult child son changing overnight.</p><p></p><p>Well, holy cow.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="scent of cedar, post: 610144, member: 1721"] You've given me so much to think about, MWM. I never did see anything either of my kids did as abusive. But when you look at this in a different light, all of it was abusive. And I've been feeding right into it. Susiestar, I agree with you, about the shame, about the guilt, about the judgment from neighbors and friends and most especially, from family. And here is the thing: I am judging myself and husband just as harshly. Which is exactly what happens in every abusive relationship. The abused person feels responsible for the abuser's behaviors and emotional reality. Wow. Paradigm shift. I need to think about this. Especially given that drug use is involved in almost every case ~ and was the defining factor, with difficult child son. WHAT IF IT WAS ALWAYS THE DRUG USE? We always looked at that as a peripheral issue, or as something we were responsible for, too...but what if drug use is what happened? In retrospect, I think difficult child daughter may always have struggled ~ with tics, with Tourette's, with night terrors. But difficult child son? Drugs, all the way. Cedar I am always posting about difficult child son changing overnight. Well, holy cow. [/QUOTE]
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OMG! Article on Parent Abuse by teen/adult children
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