OMGosh - I'm SOOOO Mad

[nvts]

I have hit the bottom. Aside from all of the bs that ah has been dishing out, I just came back from the pediatrician with Evie. I swear on all that is good in this world that physical violence is absolutely abhorent to me, but I've gotta tell you, I was ready to beat this woman to a pulp.

The Weeble (aka Evie) has oral defensiveness, a forward facing gag reflex, chokes on anything that feels "funny" in her mouth, etc., etc., etc..

This idiot starts going off on me that she's too heavy! What are you feeding her? Mind you, she's not HUGE she's 2 lbs. off the curve. Workable, right? I've moved her down to 1 bottle a day, she'll only eats chicken nuggets (cut thin), and hot dogs. If I give her pediatric vitamins, she projectile vomits. Any veggies? Corn on the cob. Fruits? Bananas. Fill that in with smooth yogurt and cheerios oh and veggie straws.

She wouldn't let me talk. Harp, harp, harp. without letting me explain everything that the PT and Occupational Therapist (OT) were telling me. Harp, harp, harp. I finally lost my cool, started to fill up with tears and said "If you'd shut the hell up and let me finish, you'd understand what I'm saying, so GET OFF IT!"

Then she shoves the curve under my nose and says "you won't look at this because you don't want to see it" I said "am I blind? I'm not looking at it because I don't want to get close enough to you to pop you right in the nose. Talk to me the right way and with respect or we're going to have a serious problem here."

She backed off.

My husband and I are seperated, I may loose the house, difficult child 1 is in a residential program, Weeble may be in a leg brace for the next 6-8 mos. for tibial torsion, difficult child 3 is being a witch AGAIN at school, everybody in the world knows the best way for me to 1. run my house 2. raise my kids 3. handle my marriage and they all impart their wisdom in the most critical ways (which is one of the reasons that AH. and I split up).

I don't know how much more I can put up with, I really don't.

Sorry for the whine - I needed to get this off my chest.

Beth

 

[gcvmom]

You need some earplugs and a glass of wine, I think. I'm so sorry you've got so much gunk on your plate right now. (((Hugs)))

 

[HaoZi]

*HUGS* honey. That's an awful lot for one person to carry!

 

[AnnieO]

Oh, Beth. Sweetheart, I feel for you. First things first!

{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}

OK. Now, in my opinion, there is only one best way for you to do anything. And that is - the best you know how.

The heck with the pediatrician. Sounds to me like Weeble is fine with her eating. TWO POUNDS? Is she MAD? Big deal. Jett is overweight and undertall for his age. Big freakin deal. Otherwise healthy is the key here.

About the tibial torsion - BM tried to claim Jett had it in both legs, and he would have to be on medication (narcotics), they'd have to break and reset both legs and he'd be in casts for 6 months. So... One leg? Both? I missed something somewhere apparently. I'm curious about it - I've never heard of it in a child so young before, so I am wondering.

And on that note - she'll be fine. Bonus - she may, due to having to wear a brace, be that much more understanding of handicaps, and for that matter, any differences - such as GFGness.

More hugs, hon. And I know how you feel.

 

[DammitJanet]

Oh sweetie...Im so sorry. I bet you were a wreck!

Its no wonder Evie is a bit heavier than she should be...she isnt walking as much I would bet because of her legs/feet. Add in the oral stuff and you have a mess. Yeah get her off the bottle but still, you are gonna put the same thing in a cup right? Duh. I found those really soft nubby sippy cups were the best to start off with. In fact, Keyana went to them at 8 months which is why I think we never had a problem breaking her to a cup...we did it so early. She never knew we broke her...lol.

As far as the braces...well both Tony and I had the tibial torsion braces as kids and Cory had tibial torsion with metatarsal rotation on his left side. Slight metatarsal rotation on the right. The didnt brace his leg but did put him in special shoes. I think they should have braced him because he has such ortho problems. Right now he looks like a walking question mark.

The only thing on me that isnt completely falling apart is my ankles...lol. And if I do say so myself, for such a heavy person, I do have good looking legs! So Evie will be just fine. She is in good company.

For some reason, I messed up all my kids feet in utero. Even Billy and Jamie had to have straight last shoes because their feet turned in slightly at birth. Maybe they just all carried weird in me or something and there wasnt room for their feet!

 

[CrazyinVA]

Hugs. I say ditch that pediatrician if you can. Not that you need a pediatrician search on your plate right now .. sigh.

 

[busywend]

Oh Beth - you so did not need this right now.

Take a deep breath.
Another.

OK. Here is my opinion. You are going to break if you do not get help soon. Period. No person could stay stable with all you have going on. Put yourself first because without you they will all be nailed, only not a nail - the kind you install with a screwdriver. Seriously, Beth is #1. Make sure you have what you need to get through the days. See if there is a teen that can come in after school some days to help you out.

Do something different. You have to.

 

[donna723]

Just the fact that she wouldn't shut up and refused to listen to you ... that alone would send me looking for a new pediatrician!

 

[DaisyFace]

Just the fact that she wouldn't shut up and refused to listen to you ... that alone would send me looking for a new pediatrician!

O yea - I second this!

Why didn't the pediatrician know all this stuff? You shouldn't have HAD to tell her...

And if she won't listen during a check up? What's gonna happen if you really need something during a sick visit?

New doctor - pronto (Not that you need any more projects right now....but something to have on the back burner.)

((((Hugs)))

 

[susiestar]

New doctor should be your first move after you have a good cry and that big glass of wine/margarita/hmj . I am SOOOOOO SORRY!! This pediatrician is a fool and her patient load will reflect it because you are NOT the only parent she is treating like this. Whether you have private insurance or medicaid, she still gets paid to treat your kids. So take those dollars away from her nad find a new doctor.

It is time to start ignoring the fools who want to critique you. WHen you are relatively calm, take a look at THEIR actions in the past. Your mom someonw who criticizes all the time? How great did she do with you and your sibs? What all has she done with your kids that upsets you?

Critiques go BOTH WAYS and if you look at these non-supportive fools in that light i am SURE you will see that they don't have a leg to stand on with their ****!. They srue are not perfect enough to throw stones at YOU!!

As for Evie, she will learn what she needs to when she needs to. At least it isn't failure to thrive, that one gets you visits from CPS if you don't go to both the doctor and the dept of health and the WIC offices weekly. yes, weekly visits to ALL 3. Had it with Wiz and the only reason we were on WIC was because the failure to thrive. We didn't meet the income guideline by about $50 per month but they watned to make "sure" that we were taking care of him right because we were "such young parents" (BS - I was 22 not 15 and husband was 34!). I actually DID get a phone call from CPS when I had to cancel visits one week because he was sick and the doctor told us he had to stay home except for going to her office. Talk about annoying!!

So Evie is NOT as "bad off" as this idiot doctor wants to think she is. You are an AWESOME mom with kids with HUGE complicated problems and all these critical jerks need to shut their pieholes and try being supportive - why can't they bring you dinner or babysit and give you movie tickets and a gift certificate for dinner somewhere instead of just piling the **** on you!!!

You are anAWESOME woman and mom and these kids are BLESSED to have you and we are blessed to have you for a friend!!!

Vent all you need to - this isn't "whining"!!

 

[TerryJ2]

Yup, lose the pediatrician. Drop her off at the Mall of America. Blindfolded.

Its no wonder Evie is a bit heavier than she should be...she isnt walking as much I would bet because of her legs/feet.

Good point, Janet!

Wow, I'm glad you gave it right back to the pediatrician, Beth. I wonder how many parents she does that to and they're too intimidated to argue back? There are some parents out there who owe you a big "thanks" today!

 

[lmf64]

(((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))\
I am so greatful that with everything I've gone through with my son that I had an understanding gp. My son has only seen a pediatrician one time and that idiot told me that my son couldn't have asthma because he was too young. One week later the pediatric respiratory specialist from the Mayo was at our local clinic consulting and within 1 minute was questioning why my son wasn't being treated for his asthma, vindication! Don't listen to that idiotic pediatrician, she obviously doesn't know her head from a hole in the ground. 2 pounds is nothing. If it was I'd have had cps at my door, as my son weighed what the average 2 year old weighs at 9 months.

 

[TerryJ2]

Just to add to Imf64's experience,
I went through 3 pediatricians EACH with-both of my kids.
The first fight was just after I gave birth, and we refused e-mycin drops in my daughter's eyes for a nonexistent STD. (They assume everyone has one. Never mind that I am allergic to most antibiotics and chances were, that my daughter was, too. husband spent his first 2 wks in the hospital with-an allergics reaction and his eyes glued shut from silver nitrate.)
Anyway, despite the general wealth of knowledge that most MDs have, this is still a capitalist society with-supply and demand. Pick up your kid and go somewhere else. And that somewhere may be just across the hall if it's a multi-physician group.

 

[DammitJanet]

I did want to say about the weight. Tonys oldest niece was hugely heavy when she was a baby. I mean fat. Tony's sister was a young mom...I think 16 or 17 when she had the child and Tony's mom was a very obese woman who was so thrilled to have this little girl granddaughter...think like me but 100 x worse...lol. They fed that child constantly. By a year she weighed about 30 something pounds and she had rolls and rolls of fat on her legs. She was so heavy she could barely stand up and support herself.

doctor got on them bad and told them...you have got to cut out the food and get her walking. Finally common sense kicked in and they did cut her back...and she started walking...and walking...and then running...and then...that child shot up and became a complete beanpole! LOL.

When Cory was a baby though I did have to keep that child from giving him bottle after bottle of kool-aid...sigh.

 

[KTMom91]

Hugs, Beth.

I agree it's time for a new pediatrician. I fired the first one Miss KT had. Miss KT had awful colic, that lasted all day, and the pediatrician decided I was an over-anxious new mom. After switching formulas several times, and getting nothing but attitude from the pediatrician, my ob/gyn told me to switch Miss KT to low-iron formula. Finally...relief for my poor baby. And me. New pediatrician was found immediately thereafter.

Is there anyone nearby who can give you a bit of a break? You have so much on your plate that you definitely need some "Beth" time.

 

[nvts]

O yea - I second this!

Why didn't the pediatrician know all this stuff? You shouldn't have HAD to tell her...

And if she won't listen during a check up? What's gonna happen if you really need something during a sick visit?

New doctor - pronto (Not that you need any more projects right now....but something to have on the back burner.)

((((Hugs)))

Why didn't the pediatrician know this? She stood there, looked me in the face, was asking me questions about repetitive motions, stacking things, lining them up, etc. and I said, "well, naturally I keep an eye out for this stuff because I don't want to take a chance at having another kiddo on the spectrum and not be aware". She said, "some of your kids are on the spectrum?" I said "all of them are except for Evie, so far. You know 1, 2, and 3 have Aspergers and 2 is Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) as well." She said "well Aspergers isn't on the Autistic spectrum and neither is Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)". Yup! She singlehandedly re-wrote the DSM IV and V!

The only reason I haven't left is I'm trying to get a Mortgage Modification and I need a letter from them telling the bank about all of the kids disabilities. After that? I'm flying out of the place - already have another practice picked out!

 

[TerryJ2]

"well Aspergers isn't on the Autistic spectrum and neither is Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)". Yup! She singlehandedly re-wrote the DSM IV and V!

Oh, she's a piece of work.

 

[HaoZi]

Oy. I think this is the part where I beat my head against the wall. Exactly what does she have a doctorate in and from which century?

 

[nvts]

Oy. I think this is the part where I beat my head against the wall. Exactly what does she have a doctorate in and from which century?

Wait...are you saying leeches aren't the standard level of care? Hmmmm...

 

[HaoZi]

Well, they're back in fashion, along with maggots. But these days they're grown in a lab, not direct from the river. And the "humours" thing is so centuries ago.