On a scale of 1 to 10, how inappropriate is it to...

[keista]

I now send my son "junking" to find stuff to take apart. (we have bulky rubbish pick up so there are always piles of stuff on the sides of the road)

I am considering myself lucky that son is either on "really mild" end of Asperger's or has great impulse control - or both. While he always did seem to have an "itch" to take things apart, he always asked permission and/or found 'appropriate' outlets via building toys.

 

[susiestar]

Why not go and get some broken appliances or computers for difficult child to take apart. Give him some things that he can take apart and let him know that those are okay to destruct and the things the family uses are not. Or get him a manual on how to fix a lawnmower engine and turn him loose with a broken one. I would go for the appliance personally because I don't like the grease all over and my boys wouldn't wash it off well, lol.

Let him know that he is allowed to do what he wants as long as he doesn't hurt anyone. Cut the cords off, or the end that goes into the socket at least so he doesn't shock himself. If he starts fixing them then he can learn to either repair the cord or work on ones with the cords intact, but only after he demonstrates that he can and will follow the safety rules.

By giving him some things that are okay to take apart you can help him learn to channel this curiosity and need into things that are not problems for other people. It will help him discover his strengths and interests as well. Heck, maybe you can get a junk video game system from someone or from a pawn shop and he can learn to fix those after taking a few apart. He could make good money doing that! He may just have a career in something mechanical when is older that you can foster now.