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Parent Emeritus
On the verge of a nervous breakdown
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<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 456791" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>Welcome to the board Ally </p><p></p><p>Your son is a 20 year old adult child. It's high time he act like an adult. Telling him he has to live by house rules or there is the door isn't turning your back on him, it's demanding respect from him. As an adult child living with you isn't a right, it's a privilege, one he's currently abusing. </p><p></p><p>Currently he's suffering from grownup-itis. In other words, I can do as I please because I'm an adult while living at home and being a kid. In short, he's taking advantage of your generosity and treating you like crud in the process.</p><p></p><p>You can't control your son. But you can control what goes on in your home and how you allow him to treat you. </p><p></p><p>I know it can be hard to draw that line in the sand and follow through with the consequences, but if you don't, it will only get worse. Your family are a wise bunch. I know it hurts to hear it, but if he can't follow house rules and treat you with respect then it's time for him to leave and make his own way (or not) in the world. He doesn't get it, because he doesn't have to get it. </p><p></p><p>Would you put up with the same treatment from a stranger? No, of course not. </p><p></p><p>If he were my son he'd be told the house rules are a b and c. Follow them or there is the door. You have every right to peace and respect in your own home. </p><p></p><p>(((hugs)))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 456791, member: 84"] Welcome to the board Ally Your son is a 20 year old adult child. It's high time he act like an adult. Telling him he has to live by house rules or there is the door isn't turning your back on him, it's demanding respect from him. As an adult child living with you isn't a right, it's a privilege, one he's currently abusing. Currently he's suffering from grownup-itis. In other words, I can do as I please because I'm an adult while living at home and being a kid. In short, he's taking advantage of your generosity and treating you like crud in the process. You can't control your son. But you can control what goes on in your home and how you allow him to treat you. I know it can be hard to draw that line in the sand and follow through with the consequences, but if you don't, it will only get worse. Your family are a wise bunch. I know it hurts to hear it, but if he can't follow house rules and treat you with respect then it's time for him to leave and make his own way (or not) in the world. He doesn't get it, because he doesn't have to get it. Would you put up with the same treatment from a stranger? No, of course not. If he were my son he'd be told the house rules are a b and c. Follow them or there is the door. You have every right to peace and respect in your own home. (((hugs))) [/QUOTE]
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