Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
On the verge of a nervous breakdown
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="seriously" data-source="post: 458058" data-attributes="member: 11920"><p>You have not failed him and he won't hate you. You are his mom and he will love you no matter what - and no matter what he says.</p><p> </p><p>But your relationship has changed - he is no longer a child whom you can protect and shelter from bad choices.</p><p></p><p>He is making his own choices and as many other CD moms will tell you - they are HIS choices and do not reflect on your or his upbringing. You did your best and it's on him now to decide how he is going to use the skills, knowledge and courage you taught him through your actions and your choices. You cannot control his choices or the outcome.</p><p></p><p>You can be there when he reaches bottom to offer the empathy and concern of an adult parent to an adult child who has made mistakes. If you rescue him from the consequences of his choices you are only delaying the day of reckoning and making that day more painful and potentially more devastating - in our experience anyway.</p><p></p><p>I don't have any words of comfort. There are no guarantees. But there are some things that can be predicted if you choose to try to rescue him and they aren't what you would want for yourself, your family or your son.</p><p></p><p>It is not going to get any easier any time soon. Hang on to your faith in him and prepare to wait it out. Don't let him down by giving in. It's OK to cry but don't condemn yourself for helping him grow up - that's what you are doing, as painful as it seems right now.</p><p></p><p>Gentle hugs.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="seriously, post: 458058, member: 11920"] You have not failed him and he won't hate you. You are his mom and he will love you no matter what - and no matter what he says. But your relationship has changed - he is no longer a child whom you can protect and shelter from bad choices. He is making his own choices and as many other CD moms will tell you - they are HIS choices and do not reflect on your or his upbringing. You did your best and it's on him now to decide how he is going to use the skills, knowledge and courage you taught him through your actions and your choices. You cannot control his choices or the outcome. You can be there when he reaches bottom to offer the empathy and concern of an adult parent to an adult child who has made mistakes. If you rescue him from the consequences of his choices you are only delaying the day of reckoning and making that day more painful and potentially more devastating - in our experience anyway. I don't have any words of comfort. There are no guarantees. But there are some things that can be predicted if you choose to try to rescue him and they aren't what you would want for yourself, your family or your son. It is not going to get any easier any time soon. Hang on to your faith in him and prepare to wait it out. Don't let him down by giving in. It's OK to cry but don't condemn yourself for helping him grow up - that's what you are doing, as painful as it seems right now. Gentle hugs. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
On the verge of a nervous breakdown
Top