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Opinions needed from those who know difficult child's hx!!!
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<blockquote data-quote="DDD" data-source="post: 430432" data-attributes="member: 35"><p>Sadly home is not an option. There is absolutely no reason to believe that there would be any benefit for him...and absolutely every reason to believe that there would be nothing more than a momentary benefit for you. He wasn't ready before and he absolutely isn't ready now. I'm sorry for that loss.</p><p> </p><p>Once that is off the table what specific choices are available. The term Residential Treatment Center (RTC) sounds really therapeutic <strong>but </strong>as any of us who have dealt with the system knows there are</p><p>huge variations in locations, programs, goals, lengths of stay, supervision etc. In our system (at least a few years ago) the placement was solely determined by an "open bed"...first come first serve. There was literally only one program that had the potential to help easy child/difficult child and even though I was "tight as ticks" with his PO she had no way of assuring him the next open bed. It was almost 100% good luck.</p><p> </p><p>Because of that experience I would arrange another longer meeting with the new PO and bring along a legal pad. Ask him "can you provide me with the names, locations</p><p>and missions of the facilities that might be available for my son?" He, or someone, should be able to provide the list (check the State Department of Juvenile Justice site etc. in case there is good info available before your meeting). That will give you some valuable input. Also on the State site you can sometimes pull up annual inspection reports, population $'s,</p><p>staff ratio #'s, average length of stay etc....plus at least one facility picture.</p><p> </p><p>I would then explore details on all other options. Boys Town? Job Corps? Halfway</p><p>houses or transitional foster homes. Once you explore those...hit the net again and see what you can find. Some of those programs work directly with Probation or Parole teams so there would be an oversight plan in place.</p><p> </p><p>Gather all the data you can and I think it will become apparent what option seems best. This is a perfect example of "hope for the best but stay prepared for the worst". He wanted to be in the drivers seat and got his wish. The next year or two will likely tell alot about his future. Meanwhile, you have regained your present and your future...don't let a slide kick in, you've worked too hard to scramble back up.</p><p>DDD</p><p> </p><p>PS: Just thought of something else. For some facilities there are parent forums that really give a true picture or close to it of how things operate.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DDD, post: 430432, member: 35"] Sadly home is not an option. There is absolutely no reason to believe that there would be any benefit for him...and absolutely every reason to believe that there would be nothing more than a momentary benefit for you. He wasn't ready before and he absolutely isn't ready now. I'm sorry for that loss. Once that is off the table what specific choices are available. The term Residential Treatment Center (RTC) sounds really therapeutic [B]but [/B]as any of us who have dealt with the system knows there are huge variations in locations, programs, goals, lengths of stay, supervision etc. In our system (at least a few years ago) the placement was solely determined by an "open bed"...first come first serve. There was literally only one program that had the potential to help easy child/difficult child and even though I was "tight as ticks" with his PO she had no way of assuring him the next open bed. It was almost 100% good luck. Because of that experience I would arrange another longer meeting with the new PO and bring along a legal pad. Ask him "can you provide me with the names, locations and missions of the facilities that might be available for my son?" He, or someone, should be able to provide the list (check the State Department of Juvenile Justice site etc. in case there is good info available before your meeting). That will give you some valuable input. Also on the State site you can sometimes pull up annual inspection reports, population $'s, staff ratio #'s, average length of stay etc....plus at least one facility picture. I would then explore details on all other options. Boys Town? Job Corps? Halfway houses or transitional foster homes. Once you explore those...hit the net again and see what you can find. Some of those programs work directly with Probation or Parole teams so there would be an oversight plan in place. Gather all the data you can and I think it will become apparent what option seems best. This is a perfect example of "hope for the best but stay prepared for the worst". He wanted to be in the drivers seat and got his wish. The next year or two will likely tell alot about his future. Meanwhile, you have regained your present and your future...don't let a slide kick in, you've worked too hard to scramble back up. DDD PS: Just thought of something else. For some facilities there are parent forums that really give a true picture or close to it of how things operate. [/QUOTE]
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