Oppositional Defiant Disorder

[lv2scuba]

Hello I am new, and boy am I glad I found you guys. My Son is 5 and has been diagnosed with with ODD, My Husband and I have been going nuts. Not only does my son have ODD, but has been dealing with his father being gone to IRAQ for the last year and a half, so now that he is home we have had all that plus the ODD. When my husband first came home things weren't as bad, but seems like things have gone from bad to worse, no method of discipline works, school & Home issues out the Ying yang. We had the behavioral Pyshcologist do the tests etc, and the psyc prescribed him Vynase, does anyone know anything about this drug? I've never heard of it and wasn't sure what to look for with it.

Thanks
discipline advise needed also!

 

[hopeful]

As a newbie, I have been reading through the various forums, looking for validation about my own experiences. My daughter is 15 now but what I am reading here takes me right back to the day. I struggled with finding support or proper medical advice mostly because I was overwhelmed and exhausted trying to make things okay and there wasn't alot of info at the time. But things are better these days. Insist, be an advocate for your kid. Don't let the GP blow you off, insist on getting second opinions. I wish I had of done that.

And.. structure and schedule makes things better. Ten minute warnings help with the big trouble times - transitions. Transitions can be, changing activities, having dinner, going to bed, going to school, someone coming home, the kid going out, even TV programs ending... Transitions are hard for all kids but seem to really impact our guys and gals. So, start warning in advance, "Dad will be home in 10 minutes... did you want to do anything for him when he comes home? Surprise him, show him a picture, make him a tea?" Warn and distract. Try to reinforce that transitions can be fun. If he says no... let it go. Warn at five minutes, at three minutes and then right at the moment. They seem not to notice but you will see a difference.

And school. Imagine having to leave behind all your safety, all the things and people that make you feel all is right in the world and then you go to a strange place, where people don't understand you, expect you to be something your not, somewhere where your old buddies from daycare don't like you, avoid you and some strange teacher is telling you what to do and she may not seem to like you either. Its a hard thing for the kids. If you can see if you can spend some time with him before and during the beginning of the class. Get info for the teacher and try to educate her/him. Let them know its not personal, he has a mental condition and (I used turettes as an example)that when he feels frustrated, stimulated, he gets mad - has a fit, like turettes. Let them know that they should not react to him, that once he is calm that problem solving can include the group. ie: the teacher says, "wow that was kind of hard for me. When Johnny gets mad like that I have really practise patience and wait until he can talk to me" Does anyone else ever get so mad they can't talk it out or sort it out?" "That must be kind of hard for Johnny" "what are some ideas about how we can help him?" If your son feels supported he will work with them, peer pressure is amazing. But if he feels like the outsider, the bad one, he will protect himself and that isn't often positive.

Go to your Parents Advisory Council and ask if there is any funds for speakers, educators who deal with these issues. Talk to the principal about starting a support group, I guarantee you there are other parents feeling alone out there.

And... I hope I didn't overwhelm you. Your probably exhausted already.. this website really helped me check it out. http://www.klis.com/chandler/pamphlet/oddcd/oddcdpamphlet.htm

 

[timi]

My son is 5 almost 6; he started kindergarten in Sept. We had "issues" before, but I was making headway-daycare and myself were both having way way more good days then bad. The school didnt bother to tell me there was an issue until mid November. Apparently my son hits, kicks even bites(he NEVER does this at home/daycare) Now that the school has told me there is a problem they've started "kicking" my son out of class and I have had to go pick him up several times. I have had resources come into the school to give them the tools that have been and are working yet the school does nothing. My son is not diagnosed though it is believed that he has ODD. My doctors appointment isnt until January, and in the meantime I have to figure out how to make the school understand that my child is not bad.... he has behaviour problems. I feel like I've run out of resources, and im suck between a rock and a rock any ideas

 

[Bunny]

My son was diagnosed with ODD and general anxiety disorder and started taking Riserdal a few weeks ago. I think that being told to "suck it up" is really poor advice. Find another psychiatrist and take your child to get a thorough evaluation now. The earlier you start to get help the better off you and your family will be. In our case, we belive that the ODD behavior is being fed by the crushing anxiety that he was dealing with and when things get to be too much for him to handle he doesn't know what to do so he would simply melt down and tantrum when things would not go the way he had it mapped out in his head. Disclipline for my difficult child has been difficult, mostly because I getg frustratged because he never seems to learn from his mistakes. We keep seeing the same defiant, disrespectul behavior and no amount of taking privlidges away seemed to get it though his head that his behavior was not going to be tolerated. Now that he started taking the Risperdal he does seem to be doing better. He's by no means perfect, but his control of his better is better and he seems to be melting less.

Good luck. There is an aswer out there. Sometimes it just takes a while to find it.

Pam

 

[Magadudie]

My difficult child was diagnosis'd with ODD when he was four years old. I knew he was ADHD, ODD by the time he was two. No one would "officially" diagnosis him till he was four. He was classic in symptoms. Good luck....it's the most difficult thing we've ever had to deal with. I've only seen it get worse over the years.

* * *I have a daughter that is now 29.. She is O.D.D. and suffers from bipolar.. *. I have five children, but she was like having 5 all rolled into one.. She has a 3 yr. old son ( my grandson) that is 10 times worse than she was.. *I can understand why I could not get the help years ago, but nobody wants to help these kids or give a diagnosis to early.. She took him to a child pshcologist and 5 minutes into his observasion he told her to get a grip on this *angry kid, She just walked out,,, The thing is she has *a 10 yr. old , and a 18month old that are easy going.. *No O.daughter.)) *He hurts every one he comes into contact with,, He threw a truck through his window last week, * I know there are Docs. out there that care . Its just a matter *finding them..

 

[Morningglory]

I have to agree with Pam about the Risperdal, My son has been Diag. with ODD and Bipolar disorder for several years now. Before the medications I was afraid he would kill someone, now? He can play with his 18 month old brother and sister with out me feeling like he will literally break them. It is not perfect like Pam said but if you can find a good doctor that can listen to your requests and make YOU part of his treatment, It will make you feel better and researching what is best will help as well. I am proactive with my sons psychiatric-doctor, she will give me a List of medications she thinks will be effective and allows me to go home research side effects and results etc .. then we discuss what Fits with my son.

 

[TeDo]

Magadudie, welcome to the board. You really should start a thread of your own (if you haven't already and I just haven't gotten to it yet) to introduce yourself and your situation to the rest of us. Posts to such an old thread tends to get missed by many.

 

[mamadoptingneice]

Help - we have been fostering my five year old niece for more than a year and are in the process of adopting her. We are 55 and 56 years old with 2 wonderful children 25 and 28 who are well educated, productive, and trying to make their way in the world. Our niece was a mess when we got her but she is doing very well outside the house - happy with preschool and has friends. She goes into a "fit" when I say no - running at me punching, kicking, scratching telling me she will do "it" anyway, says she hates me and spews lots of ugly words at me. She has been evaluated and diagnosed with ODD and we have been in play therapy for 8 months. Today's fit lasted over an hour (after a wonderful play date at the nature center with a friend??)- I told her she couldn't go outside because we were having a thunderstorm. She attacked me -she kicked me in the face so hard it knocked my contact lens out - she threatened to hit me with a 4 foot board (pulled out of a sliding door frame to deter burglars) Somehow I managed to talk her out of it. What can I do to keep her from hitting me? I'm not allowed to close her door in her bedroom (and of course no spanking). I tell her that I will protect myself and block her - I try ignoring, distracting, locking myself up in another room. Time outs don't work because she refuses them. I really need help - her parents were very violent with each other daily and in front her.

 

[TeDo]

Why aren't you "allowed" to close her bedroom door?

 

[InsaneCdn]

She has been evaluated and diagnosed with ODD and we have been in play therapy for 8 months

Who did the diagnosis?

ODD is - at least around here - considered a "placeholder" diagnosis. Yes, something is wrong - but we don't quite know what it is, so we'll use this label (ODD). It describes a set of behavior issues, but provides no guidance on interventions that work, because the underlying issues can cover a wide range of territory.

Given the background you describe - and the behavior - I'm wondering if there isn't some form of attachment disorder going on - either formal Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD), or on some other level. If so, what she really needs is bonding. Much easier at 5 months - but not impossible.

 

[keista]

Welcome mamadoptingniece!

This is a really old thread. Please start one of your own with your introduction. many members here have been through or are going through similar situations. You've found a great place for support, guidance and insights. A thread of your own will make it easier for everyone to give their input on YOUR situation.

I'll start you off with some questions which you can add to your new thread.

Has she been formally evaluated for any psycho/emotional disorders? Is she in therapy? Is she in school/daycare yet? Any such behaviors there?

Welcome again.