Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Our Daughter
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 687036" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Yes. I did not forgive my mother until she was dying. I suffered untold agony in the months before she died and afterward. </p><p>I felt only too late what not forgiving my mother (and father) fully had cost me. Part of myself.</p><p></p><p>This is part of why you are doing what you are doing. To model to her what love is and should be.</p><p>Yes. This is very wise, Tanya, almost so wise I do not fully grasp it.</p><p></p><p>I think it may have to do with guilt--who bears the guilt. I wonder if people who blame others are really ridding themselves of the hot potato of guilt or shame. I will try to think about this.</p><p></p><p>This will help me find my compassion for my sister, I hope. I wonder if her sense of entitlement, because she was victimized by others, is a defense against shame she cannot bear. </p><p>And it justifies to the person who feels a victim to do anything they want either to redress their victimization by taking advantage or punishing anybody they choose. Vengeance. Like some kind of hate mob carrying flaming sticks.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 687036, member: 18958"] Yes. I did not forgive my mother until she was dying. I suffered untold agony in the months before she died and afterward. I felt only too late what not forgiving my mother (and father) fully had cost me. Part of myself. This is part of why you are doing what you are doing. To model to her what love is and should be. Yes. This is very wise, Tanya, almost so wise I do not fully grasp it. I think it may have to do with guilt--who bears the guilt. I wonder if people who blame others are really ridding themselves of the hot potato of guilt or shame. I will try to think about this. This will help me find my compassion for my sister, I hope. I wonder if her sense of entitlement, because she was victimized by others, is a defense against shame she cannot bear. And it justifies to the person who feels a victim to do anything they want either to redress their victimization by taking advantage or punishing anybody they choose. Vengeance. Like some kind of hate mob carrying flaming sticks. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Our Daughter
Top