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our day putting difficult child into hospital
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<blockquote data-quote="Andy" data-source="post: 381875" data-attributes="member: 5096"><p>I couldn't have any communication with difficult child at all during the day - I am sure I would have been on the phone with him all day if we could - so I needed something to focus on to keep me from going bonkers. My work was my distraction and it helped that I had a private office at the time and could close the door and cry. I also had super co-workers who let me cry on their shoulder - it was my support system. The month and one half before that, I had called my supervisor to say that I didn't know what was going on with difficult child and I didn't know when/if I would be able to show up for work each day. I found out in that call that the person I thought was my supervisor no longer was and he transferred me to someone new who I had never met. I was blessed that like all my other supervisors, this new one was very understanding (what a way to start a new boss).</p><p> </p><p>You are definately not a looser. It is super hard having her call you all day long. It is very draining to have your child cry (even though you know it will happen) and beg for you to help her. You are still tied into her emotions and struggling to see what is best - should you keep her here knowing how she hates it and is fighting to get out or do you follow her emotions and call it quits? I know how super hard it would be but I am thinking that maybe limiting her ability to call you whenever she wants would help? You would then only hear the distress at certain times. Her constant calls are not helping you to see the true picture - you are only seeing and feeling her anguish - something she will have to work through to get better but she is trying to get you to do the work for her and get her out of the facility that may just be what she needs to get better.</p><p> </p><p>I hope the insurance company does not dictate the outcome. Stay strong over the weekend and talk to Monday's staff. I don't know how much programming is done on the weekends or how involved the staff get with it. Monday can bring even more reassurances. It seems like evening and weekend staff don't understand the importance of continuing treatment - like the kid is suppose to turn off the problems and wait for the day time week day experts to deal with the issues.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Andy, post: 381875, member: 5096"] I couldn't have any communication with difficult child at all during the day - I am sure I would have been on the phone with him all day if we could - so I needed something to focus on to keep me from going bonkers. My work was my distraction and it helped that I had a private office at the time and could close the door and cry. I also had super co-workers who let me cry on their shoulder - it was my support system. The month and one half before that, I had called my supervisor to say that I didn't know what was going on with difficult child and I didn't know when/if I would be able to show up for work each day. I found out in that call that the person I thought was my supervisor no longer was and he transferred me to someone new who I had never met. I was blessed that like all my other supervisors, this new one was very understanding (what a way to start a new boss). You are definately not a looser. It is super hard having her call you all day long. It is very draining to have your child cry (even though you know it will happen) and beg for you to help her. You are still tied into her emotions and struggling to see what is best - should you keep her here knowing how she hates it and is fighting to get out or do you follow her emotions and call it quits? I know how super hard it would be but I am thinking that maybe limiting her ability to call you whenever she wants would help? You would then only hear the distress at certain times. Her constant calls are not helping you to see the true picture - you are only seeing and feeling her anguish - something she will have to work through to get better but she is trying to get you to do the work for her and get her out of the facility that may just be what she needs to get better. I hope the insurance company does not dictate the outcome. Stay strong over the weekend and talk to Monday's staff. I don't know how much programming is done on the weekends or how involved the staff get with it. Monday can bring even more reassurances. It seems like evening and weekend staff don't understand the importance of continuing treatment - like the kid is suppose to turn off the problems and wait for the day time week day experts to deal with the issues. [/QUOTE]
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