Our difficult child new kitten

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Californiablonde, Jun 25, 2012.

  1. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    A couple of months ago we adopted a twelve week old kitten after our beloved cat Tigger passed away unexpectedly. I have been a cat owner all my life. I am a total cat lover. Unfortunately I just cannot seem to bond with our new cat. We have had her since late April and she is totally 100% the opposite of almost every other cat I have had before her. She is not very affectionate or loving. Our previous cat had anxiety issues, which is why we had to ultimately give him up, but he was the sweetest most affectionate cat I have ever owned. I cannot help but compare our previous cat Tigger to the new one we have now, who is named Lily.

    Tigger loved to be petted. He would rub up against me and purr. He would sit in my lap and let me pet him while I was watching TV. He would sleep with me and purr the whole time he was with me. He loved affection. This cat does not. I try to pet her and she attacks my hand. She is just a five month old kitten so I know that part of it has to do with her wanting to play, but still, it seems like she never has a calm moment. Not ever. She is hyper. She is destructive. She jumps up on the kitchen counter and takes all of my sponges down from the sink. I find her playing with them in the middle of the living room. difficult child 1 has her artwork spread out over the table and counters in the living room. The cat attacks the paper and rips it to shreds. I have to keep the bathroom door shut at all times otherwise the cat rips apart the entire toilet paper roll.

    I have never had these problems with any of my previous kittens. Oh, and I totally wanted an indoor cat like my cat Tigger was. I think it's going to be next to impossible to keep this cat indoors. Every morning before work she sneaks out as soon as we open the door. The kids and I try to catch her but she runs fast and hides under cars. We have missed the summer school bus twice in the last two days because we were too busy hunting her down and dragging her back inside after she had escaped. I think she is too young to be outside, plus I really wanted to avoid getting flees at all cost. I really was hoping she would be content in doors but she has proven that she is not. I have had several cats get hit by cars in the past so I am very paranoid about that happening again. Lily is still so small and I'm afraid it might happen to her.

    I don't know what I should do. Should I just cave in and buy her a collar and name tag and hope for the best? Or try and force the cat to stay indoors at all times? I've never had this problem with any of my other cats so I don't know what to do. I really wish I could bond with this cat but I still feel like she's a stranger. Totally rare for me. And difficult child 1 says she does not like her because she is not affectionate enough. I tend to agree with her. She prefers to sleep by herself in the dirty clothes basket instead of sleeping in the bed with any of us. I totally miss my Tigger and all of his love and affection. This new cat just isn't the same...sigh.
  2. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    Sweetie... My AngelKitten was snuggly and purry and wonderful, though she too would attack random ankles...

    Possum sleeps a lot, but he's not really cuddly. And Squirrel - well, she's my ADD kitty.

    I wish one of them would snuggle with me. But, no, that's not them. They do love me though.

    I think maybe Lily needs more playtime - got a stick with a feather on a string???
  3. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    She will change as she gets older. I swear they have phases and change up their habits now and then. My Scrappy sleeps with me but does not like to be petted. Every now and then he will crawl right on me and get almost to close to my face and stay for an hour. My Bella almost never snuggles. The only way she will sit next to you is if you have a folded blanket next to you. Then u can pet her all u want. Be patient.
  4. FlowerGarden

    FlowerGarden Active Member

    My previous cat was so affectionate and so attached to my lap and being petted. A few months after she died, we adopted a kitten. She was constantly on the go and I thought it was because she finally had a house to explore and once she adjusted she would cuddle. She is over a year old now. The only cuddle time I get is when she first sees me in the morning and when I get home from work. Those are the only times I can pet her, too. It lasts about a minute. She loves my middle son. She is constantly in his room. She will lie on the bed with him. She lets him pet her just a little longer than me. Lately, when I sit in the recliner with my feet up, she will lie up against my leg. The other day, she did curl up on my lap for a good 10 minutes but the phone rang and scared her.
    She does love to play with me though. She enjoys bringing me a toy to throw and then brings it back to me. I am hoping as time goes on, she will calm down a bit more and start to enjoy more cuddling.
    As for letting her out, please don't. Growing up, we had outdoor cats and we had 2 really horrible experiences.
  5. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    When the panther boys showed up in the yard, Miss KT wanted to keep all three, but the idea of three kittens loose in the house, especially around a Jack Russell, was more than I wanted to deal with...so I bought a ferret cage. The kittens were put in the ferret cage when we left the house, and out whenever we're home.After three years of having their own personal habitat, they know to tuck themselves in at night, they have food, water, and a poop box on different levels. It kept them safe from the dog and from dashing out the front door when we were trying to leave.

    Just thought I'd share...
  6. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    Well I decided to make her stay in the bedroom when we're gone all day. This morning I put her litter box, food, and water in the bedroom, put her in there, and shut the door. No chances for her to escape out the front door. She cried as soon as I shut the door. The cat really does like to explore the whole house so I know she's not happy locked in one room but I see no other choice for now. I am going to try my hardest to make her be an indoor kitty. I'm hoping it's a kitten phase and as she gets older she will calm down a bit. Only time will tell.