Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Overwhelmed with dysfunction...just venting
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 618768" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>BITS, I know you said no need to reply, however, I want you to know I read your post and that I am sorry this has gone down this way today. It's difficult enough to deal with our difficult child's, but to deal with 'old' parent difficult child's as well, geez, my heart goes out to you.</p><p></p><p>Well, my first thought to your pondering 'will I ever get out of this trap of trying to convince him one more time that it is him and not me'.................is that today, you may have reached that point and gotten out of that trap. Whatever you said, it was likely the truth and any difficult child worth his salt is going to deny truth and put up a stink about it..........so the three of them acted out against you...........wow. It sounded to me as if you made it clear that you are done paying, financially and with your well being, for your son. The end of our 'paying' can be brutally dramatic, as it sounds like it was..................but an end is an end and tomorrow in the light of day, there may be more feelings, more stuff to deal with, but you've made some pretty big strides in the detachment process and unfortunately, there is often intensity as we let go............</p><p></p><p>I am sorry BITS, it had to have been a bad day. Your parents and your difficult child are not right, they are wrong, they are operating out of the difficult child handbook which states emphatically, "never take responsibility for your actions when you can blame it all on someone else." Don't buy it, step out of the FOG, see it clearly, you stopped enabling your son and your son is angry that his ride is over and your parents seem to want to take on difficult child without the actual cost of that. Too bad. You're now out. Let them stew in their difficult child soup and let it go. They seem to deserve each other in their dysfunction..............you do not deserve that, you deserve peace. I think you may be a lot closer to detachment then you think you are................stay the course, you are on the right track and sometimes when on the right track, you can still experience some bumps as you get back on the main road. </p><p></p><p>Sending you warm thoughts and big hugs.............</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 618768, member: 13542"] BITS, I know you said no need to reply, however, I want you to know I read your post and that I am sorry this has gone down this way today. It's difficult enough to deal with our difficult child's, but to deal with 'old' parent difficult child's as well, geez, my heart goes out to you. Well, my first thought to your pondering 'will I ever get out of this trap of trying to convince him one more time that it is him and not me'.................is that today, you may have reached that point and gotten out of that trap. Whatever you said, it was likely the truth and any difficult child worth his salt is going to deny truth and put up a stink about it..........so the three of them acted out against you...........wow. It sounded to me as if you made it clear that you are done paying, financially and with your well being, for your son. The end of our 'paying' can be brutally dramatic, as it sounds like it was..................but an end is an end and tomorrow in the light of day, there may be more feelings, more stuff to deal with, but you've made some pretty big strides in the detachment process and unfortunately, there is often intensity as we let go............ I am sorry BITS, it had to have been a bad day. Your parents and your difficult child are not right, they are wrong, they are operating out of the difficult child handbook which states emphatically, "never take responsibility for your actions when you can blame it all on someone else." Don't buy it, step out of the FOG, see it clearly, you stopped enabling your son and your son is angry that his ride is over and your parents seem to want to take on difficult child without the actual cost of that. Too bad. You're now out. Let them stew in their difficult child soup and let it go. They seem to deserve each other in their dysfunction..............you do not deserve that, you deserve peace. I think you may be a lot closer to detachment then you think you are................stay the course, you are on the right track and sometimes when on the right track, you can still experience some bumps as you get back on the main road. Sending you warm thoughts and big hugs............. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Overwhelmed with dysfunction...just venting
Top