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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 276487" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>A thought on the subject of husband getting to work - can you coordinate your times so you can drop him off on your way to school? Even if you have to leave earlier than usual (it gives you a chance to get some extra reading in the library).</p><p></p><p>We live in a very isolated spot and husband's car has been in pieces at the garage for the last six weeks. THis morning, having got the car back on Saturday, husband went to start it to go to work and - nothing. He was in a rush, dashed back in and said, "Is it OK to take your car? Do you need it today? Is there anything in the car you need to get out before I go?"</p><p></p><p>Tomorrow i WILL need the car and his still isn't back from the garage. So the plan of action for tomorrow would be, husband would catch the boat to "the mainland" and the trian from there. Because difficult child 3 & I will be out in the evening, we would meet up with husband out there, waiting for him at the station to bring him home. On Wendesday - similarstory. I have to drive into the city. difficult child 3 & I don't need to be there until 10 am, husband has to be there at 8 am. So difficult child 3 & I will probably have two hours extra time waiting. But that's OK, it's a comfortable car to sit in and difficult child 3 can get some schoolwork done while we wait.</p><p></p><p>Teamwork works. But it still takes compromise.</p><p></p><p>If husband weren't also prepared to compromise and also be accomodating about it, he could go hang. But I know we can work it out, we have spent 30 years working out many little practical things like this.</p><p></p><p>As for breaking a vow - you were a different person back then, making the vow under different circumstances. There were two sides to the vow and that makes it conditional. Sorry. </p><p></p><p>ANd the expense of divorcing needs to be weight up against the continued expense of NOT divorcing. How much would it cost you to split everthing 50:50, vs how much is it going to cost you to stay? How much money does he cost you in unnecessary repairs, bad maintenance, poor management? How much do you sink in to your family budget each week (as a percentage)? How many years would it take to reach break-even point? And would all this matter, if you could move interstate first?</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 276487, member: 1991"] A thought on the subject of husband getting to work - can you coordinate your times so you can drop him off on your way to school? Even if you have to leave earlier than usual (it gives you a chance to get some extra reading in the library). We live in a very isolated spot and husband's car has been in pieces at the garage for the last six weeks. THis morning, having got the car back on Saturday, husband went to start it to go to work and - nothing. He was in a rush, dashed back in and said, "Is it OK to take your car? Do you need it today? Is there anything in the car you need to get out before I go?" Tomorrow i WILL need the car and his still isn't back from the garage. So the plan of action for tomorrow would be, husband would catch the boat to "the mainland" and the trian from there. Because difficult child 3 & I will be out in the evening, we would meet up with husband out there, waiting for him at the station to bring him home. On Wendesday - similarstory. I have to drive into the city. difficult child 3 & I don't need to be there until 10 am, husband has to be there at 8 am. So difficult child 3 & I will probably have two hours extra time waiting. But that's OK, it's a comfortable car to sit in and difficult child 3 can get some schoolwork done while we wait. Teamwork works. But it still takes compromise. If husband weren't also prepared to compromise and also be accomodating about it, he could go hang. But I know we can work it out, we have spent 30 years working out many little practical things like this. As for breaking a vow - you were a different person back then, making the vow under different circumstances. There were two sides to the vow and that makes it conditional. Sorry. ANd the expense of divorcing needs to be weight up against the continued expense of NOT divorcing. How much would it cost you to split everthing 50:50, vs how much is it going to cost you to stay? How much money does he cost you in unnecessary repairs, bad maintenance, poor management? How much do you sink in to your family budget each week (as a percentage)? How many years would it take to reach break-even point? And would all this matter, if you could move interstate first? Marg [/QUOTE]
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