A week or so ago I was going somewhere with my mom and we were talking about my dad's aspie intensity. When he retired it drove her nuts and still sometimes does. I made what to me was more of an offhand comment than anything profound and I was totally shocked when it really surprised her. My dad has that intensity in a MAJOR way. I commented that even though it was annoying when it was about some random hobby, it was really neat to me, esp as a kid/teen because he applied that same intensity to loving my mom. It had NEVER occurred to me that she couldn't see that. I remember being about 5 and realizing it, that my parents were a lot different than my friends because of this intensity. For those of you in relationship with Aspies, it may not always be easily visible, but this might apply to your relationship also.