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Substance Abuse
petrified for 23yo son..
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<blockquote data-quote="rebelson" data-source="post: 677135" data-attributes="member: 19966"><p>I also had a HORRENDOUS childhood. My mother divorced father when I was 4-5, being the youngest I had 4 older sibs- 3 of which are brothers and they were already out of house, in college. Lucky them. My sister was still a minor, so for ~4yrs, post-divorce....I had her around. Then, she took off for college. It was just me and dysfunctional, histrionic mother (RIP) for the next 9. I still miss her HORRIBLY, it's been since Aug. 2011. I was dragged around FL, one town to the next, one apt to the next, very briefly to New Orleans (where she was from) and back to FL with her total of 4 more divorces in that next 13yrs. She married the same man twice, too. That is just a superficial description of what I endured. I had huge amount of forgiveness, I guess! And, I knew her childhood was horrible, her father ADORED her and her mother was cruel to her. They were also very wealthy so she was horrible with handling $, I suffered from that as often our lights would be turned off due to nonpayment, etc. Anyways, I came out of that horrible-ness and was a very successful, functional woman! She was so lucky that I was such a problem-free child, I EASILY could've turned to drugs and sex in hight school! Never ever did anything to give her one problem. I had compassion for her. Even when I was an adult, I NEVER, EVER once brought up any of that to her. Never had any resentment to her. Yes, I have moments where I think back on my childhood, and the feeling I feel, is sadness. I told my husband this past Halloween, that in the midst of all the costumes, trick-or-treating with our littles, I had a lightbulb, flashback moment. Or, rather could not find one. Meaning, I sat one day and tried my hardest to 'find' a memory of ME going trick-or-treating. I could not! I am not sure if I even ever went! I certainly can not ever imagine my mother taking me! She had so many fears...I would think she would've been too scared to go out after dark and also, she was not the type to do any type of exercise. So, I would imagine she wouldn't have been down with the walking part. Perhaps, my sister took me? But, can't imagine mom letting HER be out in the dark with me, either.</p><p></p><p>With all that said. One can have a truly horrible childhood and come out unscathed, like mois. OR, one can have a very stable childhood, like son did, and turn out like this. I realize he had a missing father, but nonetheless, his childhood was stable as in we lived in the same home, he stayed in the same school, same friends...had routine, we ate dinner together most nights, no excessive or crazy fighting with my hub/me, etc.</p><p></p><p>I guess it's a crapshoot.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="rebelson, post: 677135, member: 19966"] I also had a HORRENDOUS childhood. My mother divorced father when I was 4-5, being the youngest I had 4 older sibs- 3 of which are brothers and they were already out of house, in college. Lucky them. My sister was still a minor, so for ~4yrs, post-divorce....I had her around. Then, she took off for college. It was just me and dysfunctional, histrionic mother (RIP) for the next 9. I still miss her HORRIBLY, it's been since Aug. 2011. I was dragged around FL, one town to the next, one apt to the next, very briefly to New Orleans (where she was from) and back to FL with her total of 4 more divorces in that next 13yrs. She married the same man twice, too. That is just a superficial description of what I endured. I had huge amount of forgiveness, I guess! And, I knew her childhood was horrible, her father ADORED her and her mother was cruel to her. They were also very wealthy so she was horrible with handling $, I suffered from that as often our lights would be turned off due to nonpayment, etc. Anyways, I came out of that horrible-ness and was a very successful, functional woman! She was so lucky that I was such a problem-free child, I EASILY could've turned to drugs and sex in hight school! Never ever did anything to give her one problem. I had compassion for her. Even when I was an adult, I NEVER, EVER once brought up any of that to her. Never had any resentment to her. Yes, I have moments where I think back on my childhood, and the feeling I feel, is sadness. I told my husband this past Halloween, that in the midst of all the costumes, trick-or-treating with our littles, I had a lightbulb, flashback moment. Or, rather could not find one. Meaning, I sat one day and tried my hardest to 'find' a memory of ME going trick-or-treating. I could not! I am not sure if I even ever went! I certainly can not ever imagine my mother taking me! She had so many fears...I would think she would've been too scared to go out after dark and also, she was not the type to do any type of exercise. So, I would imagine she wouldn't have been down with the walking part. Perhaps, my sister took me? But, can't imagine mom letting HER be out in the dark with me, either. With all that said. One can have a truly horrible childhood and come out unscathed, like mois. OR, one can have a very stable childhood, like son did, and turn out like this. I realize he had a missing father, but nonetheless, his childhood was stable as in we lived in the same home, he stayed in the same school, same friends...had routine, we ate dinner together most nights, no excessive or crazy fighting with my hub/me, etc. I guess it's a crapshoot. [/QUOTE]
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