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Please help, I desperately need some advice! V V Long!!!!
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<blockquote data-quote="busywend" data-source="post: 425157" data-attributes="member: 391"><p>Welcome liz-milne - if that is your real name we request that you change your screen name as we desire privacy for all the children discussed here. </p><p> </p><p>She certainly sounds ODD. To me there might be some sensory things going on as well. Look into Sensory Integration Disorder. Also, she may be ADD without the H it is more like their brain is ADHD and can not focus or settle - even if their body is not hyper. </p><p> </p><p>A few things I can suggest. Stop trying to parent her as a typical child. She is not typical. I found non-traditional parenting most helpful. It was hard because it made me very uncomfortable to not parent in the way I was meant to parent. It took me out of my comfort zone. What does this mean? </p><p> </p><p>First of all, while many 7 year olds may be able to handle going to the park alone in Scotland (I do not think we have enough safety in the US to be able to do it here) - I do not think your difficult child is able. I suspect it will cause her more harm than good. She may be picked on (you said she can not keep friends so I am assuming she can be offputting to kids) and it can cause all kinds of reactions from her. From lying to violence. I really see trouble brewing there. Especially with her getting THAT upset at not being able to go. So, while you are trying to give independence (like you would for a typical child) I would change that thought process for now. </p><p> </p><p>Some other things to let go of....the socks. Forget it. It is not worth yet another battle. She may even have some sensory issues with socks and may require them to be a certain way so they feel 'right' to her. The bathing & teeth are one you likley have to keep up on. But, there are many little things you can change to help reduce the number of arguments. </p><p> </p><p>That became my goal so that our home was not such a battleground.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="busywend, post: 425157, member: 391"] Welcome liz-milne - if that is your real name we request that you change your screen name as we desire privacy for all the children discussed here. She certainly sounds ODD. To me there might be some sensory things going on as well. Look into Sensory Integration Disorder. Also, she may be ADD without the H it is more like their brain is ADHD and can not focus or settle - even if their body is not hyper. A few things I can suggest. Stop trying to parent her as a typical child. She is not typical. I found non-traditional parenting most helpful. It was hard because it made me very uncomfortable to not parent in the way I was meant to parent. It took me out of my comfort zone. What does this mean? First of all, while many 7 year olds may be able to handle going to the park alone in Scotland (I do not think we have enough safety in the US to be able to do it here) - I do not think your difficult child is able. I suspect it will cause her more harm than good. She may be picked on (you said she can not keep friends so I am assuming she can be offputting to kids) and it can cause all kinds of reactions from her. From lying to violence. I really see trouble brewing there. Especially with her getting THAT upset at not being able to go. So, while you are trying to give independence (like you would for a typical child) I would change that thought process for now. Some other things to let go of....the socks. Forget it. It is not worth yet another battle. She may even have some sensory issues with socks and may require them to be a certain way so they feel 'right' to her. The bathing & teeth are one you likley have to keep up on. But, there are many little things you can change to help reduce the number of arguments. That became my goal so that our home was not such a battleground. [/QUOTE]
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Please help, I desperately need some advice! V V Long!!!!
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