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Please, Higher Being, tell me...
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<blockquote data-quote="Mrs Smith" data-source="post: 66144" data-attributes="member: 3893"><p>This was the hard part for me. We were all out of control at one point because of our personalities. He shouted, we shouted back, he resisted authority, we pushed harder, he dug in further, we upped the ante, etc.... One day I was starting to fall asleep and was partly conscious when he started to meltdown over something. I just sat there half asleep and observed - too tired to react. It was really eye opening. I never realized how much my emotional reaction affected his meltdown.</p><p></p><p>It never going to be perfect but it's so much better now. My kid lost it last night because I wouldn't let him make a 4th call to his friend (the rule is 3) and he got in my face, shouting and ranting but it never got physical. I just sat there, calmly reminding him of the rule, acknowledging his disappointment and suggesting he go to his room to calm down. He did exactly what I asked, came back out when he was calm and we discussed the situation. He found something else to do and his friend did eventually call him back. This is progress in our house. In the past there would have been physical aggression, property damage, long rages and bad feelings lasting days. I never realized how much I was contributing to the problem. It's really hard to detach when you're being attacked but so worth it in the end.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Mrs Smith, post: 66144, member: 3893"] This was the hard part for me. We were all out of control at one point because of our personalities. He shouted, we shouted back, he resisted authority, we pushed harder, he dug in further, we upped the ante, etc.... One day I was starting to fall asleep and was partly conscious when he started to meltdown over something. I just sat there half asleep and observed - too tired to react. It was really eye opening. I never realized how much my emotional reaction affected his meltdown. It never going to be perfect but it's so much better now. My kid lost it last night because I wouldn't let him make a 4th call to his friend (the rule is 3) and he got in my face, shouting and ranting but it never got physical. I just sat there, calmly reminding him of the rule, acknowledging his disappointment and suggesting he go to his room to calm down. He did exactly what I asked, came back out when he was calm and we discussed the situation. He found something else to do and his friend did eventually call him back. This is progress in our house. In the past there would have been physical aggression, property damage, long rages and bad feelings lasting days. I never realized how much I was contributing to the problem. It's really hard to detach when you're being attacked but so worth it in the end. [/QUOTE]
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