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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 312577" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>Welcome!! There is an awful lot of info here that you have given us and have been given. Your son and husband are blessed to have you. I must say I sort of smiled when you spoke about your husband. I have a similar situation with my husband and with my own dad/bro. </p><p></p><p>I think the teachers, school staff/administration, doctors, therapists, etc that you have seen should be sued for malpractice and then taken out and horse-whipped. So many red flags for many problems are there and were there early on and these people failed you and your son. There is more wrong with those people than there is with your son! </p><p></p><p>There are many professionals in many fields that can help. While some here prefer neuropsychs because they did a good job with their kids, others here have had horrible experiences. I had a developmental pediatrician evaluate my son and it was about 6 hours of testing. He was not just tested by the dev pediatrician. They have a team of different experts in a variety of fields and they each tested my son. Then they spoke together about the results and problems and best treatment options. This is called a multi-disciplinary evaluation and is usually found in university and children's hospitals. I lucked into it by accident. It is another route you can try if seeing a neuropsychologist is difficult. Or if you want another opinion.</p><p></p><p>My Aspie has seen a psychiatrist since he was 6 years old. Not all kids on the autistic spectrum are helped by medications, but the medications that are helpful should only be dispensed by someone with certification in child and adolescent psychiatry or developmental pediatrics. Our dev pediatrician was also certified as a psychiatrist but I don't know if other dev peds are. medications won't "fix" autistic spectrum disorders but they CAN help some of the symptoms and can make life a lot better for some children and families.</p><p></p><p>Like your son, Wiz (my difficult child) would ask for his medications. He never avoided taking them. If he did start to balk on a medication we talked and it was because of a side effect. Then I called the doctor and changed it. Now, at 17, he is still on medications and it is still because he can tell a positive difference in how he feels and how others treat him. </p><p></p><p>I would urge you to find a GOOD Occupational Therapist (Occupational Therapist (OT)) and to have him evaluated for Sensory Integration disorder. He is long past the usual time for this, but it may provide ways for you and he to handle some of the quirks. For more info on this I suggest The Out Of Sync Child by Kranowitz and The Out Of Sync Child Has Fun (same author). The first explains the problem and some ways to treat it. The second has a lot of ideas for fun activities that fit your child's sensory needs. We found that by using brushing therapy and providing the right sensory diet our youngest avoided the Aspie diagnosis and it greatly calmed our difficult child. thank you would have been just barely into Aspie-dom, but now most of the problems are gone. he is quirky but it doesn't provide many problems for us. </p><p></p><p>It is also one of the only things that is treated without medicines and can make a HUGE difference in a child's life. My thank you couldn't sit through a church service unless we were in the very back. the organ bothered him even then and we would have to take him out halfway through. After a year of brushing and work on the sensory stuff he could not only sit through a service but ENJOY it also. </p><p></p><p>I also strongly encourage you to write a parent report. It is a format for organizing all the info about your son. years ago some parents worked it out so that all the info from all the "experts" would be in one place. It helps communication a whole lot - esp when you can give copies of the report or parts of it to a new "expert" and save yourself a lot of time. <a href="http://www.conductdisorders.com/forum/showthread.php?t=10" target="_blank">http://www.conductdisorders.com/forum/showthread.php?t=10</a> is the link to it.</p><p></p><p>One last word of advice and I will end this tome. The ONE thing that I wish I knew from the beginning and didn't is that my "Mommy Gut" or "Mommy Instincts" are NEVER wrong. No matter what the docs or pros or experts say, if your gut says "NO NO NO NO NO" or even the quieter "NO" that is the ONLY answer that should rule the day. The times I made horrible, wrong, hurtful decisions were when I ignored my instincts. </p><p></p><p>The experts spend 5-15 minutes with your child. Maybe an hour if they are doing testing or a therapy session. They are experts in their fields (or not and are pretending to have a clue because they got through medication school). How long do YOU spend with your child? YOU are the true expert in your child. You may not know what medications do what, or the names of certain behaviors or symptoms or whatever. You may or may not have gone to college, or even finished high school. YOU are still the one who knows the MOST about your child. Period. The experts may try to intimidate you or confuse you or treat you like a child. YOU can still say NO. In fact they have to get you to say YES before they can do anything. Think about that. Even after all those years of schooling and practice and experience in a field they still have to get you to say YES to be able to do anything with/to your child.</p><p></p><p>That is because YOU are the true expert in the child. Makes you stop and think, doesn't it? When I finally realized it, WOW! There was no stopping me. I made a lot fewer really big mistakes after I accepted that.</p><p></p><p>I will say goodnight now. Many hugs, and welcome to our forum!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 312577, member: 1233"] Welcome!! There is an awful lot of info here that you have given us and have been given. Your son and husband are blessed to have you. I must say I sort of smiled when you spoke about your husband. I have a similar situation with my husband and with my own dad/bro. I think the teachers, school staff/administration, doctors, therapists, etc that you have seen should be sued for malpractice and then taken out and horse-whipped. So many red flags for many problems are there and were there early on and these people failed you and your son. There is more wrong with those people than there is with your son! There are many professionals in many fields that can help. While some here prefer neuropsychs because they did a good job with their kids, others here have had horrible experiences. I had a developmental pediatrician evaluate my son and it was about 6 hours of testing. He was not just tested by the dev pediatrician. They have a team of different experts in a variety of fields and they each tested my son. Then they spoke together about the results and problems and best treatment options. This is called a multi-disciplinary evaluation and is usually found in university and children's hospitals. I lucked into it by accident. It is another route you can try if seeing a neuropsychologist is difficult. Or if you want another opinion. My Aspie has seen a psychiatrist since he was 6 years old. Not all kids on the autistic spectrum are helped by medications, but the medications that are helpful should only be dispensed by someone with certification in child and adolescent psychiatry or developmental pediatrics. Our dev pediatrician was also certified as a psychiatrist but I don't know if other dev peds are. medications won't "fix" autistic spectrum disorders but they CAN help some of the symptoms and can make life a lot better for some children and families. Like your son, Wiz (my difficult child) would ask for his medications. He never avoided taking them. If he did start to balk on a medication we talked and it was because of a side effect. Then I called the doctor and changed it. Now, at 17, he is still on medications and it is still because he can tell a positive difference in how he feels and how others treat him. I would urge you to find a GOOD Occupational Therapist (Occupational Therapist (OT)) and to have him evaluated for Sensory Integration disorder. He is long past the usual time for this, but it may provide ways for you and he to handle some of the quirks. For more info on this I suggest The Out Of Sync Child by Kranowitz and The Out Of Sync Child Has Fun (same author). The first explains the problem and some ways to treat it. The second has a lot of ideas for fun activities that fit your child's sensory needs. We found that by using brushing therapy and providing the right sensory diet our youngest avoided the Aspie diagnosis and it greatly calmed our difficult child. thank you would have been just barely into Aspie-dom, but now most of the problems are gone. he is quirky but it doesn't provide many problems for us. It is also one of the only things that is treated without medicines and can make a HUGE difference in a child's life. My thank you couldn't sit through a church service unless we were in the very back. the organ bothered him even then and we would have to take him out halfway through. After a year of brushing and work on the sensory stuff he could not only sit through a service but ENJOY it also. I also strongly encourage you to write a parent report. It is a format for organizing all the info about your son. years ago some parents worked it out so that all the info from all the "experts" would be in one place. It helps communication a whole lot - esp when you can give copies of the report or parts of it to a new "expert" and save yourself a lot of time. [URL]http://www.conductdisorders.com/forum/showthread.php?t=10[/URL] is the link to it. One last word of advice and I will end this tome. The ONE thing that I wish I knew from the beginning and didn't is that my "Mommy Gut" or "Mommy Instincts" are NEVER wrong. No matter what the docs or pros or experts say, if your gut says "NO NO NO NO NO" or even the quieter "NO" that is the ONLY answer that should rule the day. The times I made horrible, wrong, hurtful decisions were when I ignored my instincts. The experts spend 5-15 minutes with your child. Maybe an hour if they are doing testing or a therapy session. They are experts in their fields (or not and are pretending to have a clue because they got through medication school). How long do YOU spend with your child? YOU are the true expert in your child. You may not know what medications do what, or the names of certain behaviors or symptoms or whatever. You may or may not have gone to college, or even finished high school. YOU are still the one who knows the MOST about your child. Period. The experts may try to intimidate you or confuse you or treat you like a child. YOU can still say NO. In fact they have to get you to say YES before they can do anything. Think about that. Even after all those years of schooling and practice and experience in a field they still have to get you to say YES to be able to do anything with/to your child. That is because YOU are the true expert in the child. Makes you stop and think, doesn't it? When I finally realized it, WOW! There was no stopping me. I made a lot fewer really big mistakes after I accepted that. I will say goodnight now. Many hugs, and welcome to our forum! [/QUOTE]
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