Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by hearts and roses, Aug 22, 2011.
so I don't kill my H tonight.
Congratulations! Following your vacation I bet you had the strength to do it! Hang in there. DDD
...if anger were the only strength I needed...☺ Thanks
Will pretzel and send you some of my calm.
I could commiserate, but not send peaceful vibes. Sorry.
I'm on the brink of committing homicide myself. However, it did manage to get husband and Travis up and moving in the yard. Whether or not they accomplish anything may determine if they live.........I'd LOL except it's gone beyond the point of funny. I am sooooooooooooooooooooo sick of the males thinking I'm not just supposed to run the household, but repair it, clean it, organize it AND do all the yard work. If I'm doing all that wth are they here for?? omg
Thank you...he's not home yet so I've had some time to simmer. However, if he gives me attitude, that simmer may turn into a full bubbling boil. Thankfully easy child is out of the house...I warned difficult child, who stopped by, that she can stay for dinner, but then she may want to flee as well. For the first time in a long time, my mom was clear and present today. I ended up talking things out with her and she gave me some very valuable words of advice so I'm keeping those words in my mind-just to keep my head about me. It was nice to have mom back, even if it only lasted till bingo started.
Got them all folded up and crammed down the broadband cable -- they should reach you in a few nanoseconds. Hope they're the right size!
Sending peaceful calming vibes your way H&R ... Good Luck Dear !!
Hoping for an evening free from police and/or a need to hide a body.
Sending peaceful vibes your way. (((hugs)))
Well, I didn't kill him. Just thought you'd want to be sure, lol.
We did have a pretty big fight (loud argument, in polite terms). I fought the urge to run around closing windows...because it was pretty loud. And because it's not really hot here, I'm assuming that some neighbors could have overheard...and of course, there are all those ding dang walkers that pass our house because we're right on the corner of a busy back road.
But at least I got it all out. Without going into all the details - this all had to do with his mother. You may recall that our HOME was in father in law's name - father in law died - the house will go to probate so it can be put into mother in law's name, then she would quit claim it to us, then we'd assume the mortgage, etc., the house would then be in our name. This has been an ongoing argument between H and me (I've been hounding him for years to get this done BEFORE something happened to his dad). Anyway, mother in law called me at work yesterday - we are all assuming that she's still not found her footing since her H's death and is overwhelmed by all the paperwork that needs to be completed and filed. Anyway, she called me because she wanted to speak with the lawyer we retained for the probate of the house to make sure they were on it. Okay, it IS her business, but she's easily confused and confusing, but I gave her the number. Before hanging up with me, she seemed to go out of her way to make a point: She said, "Well, once the probate is complete, the house will be in mine and H's name and I was thinking that I could give him money to finish the addition upstairs. I don't know how you've lived like that..." Of course, I tuned out at that point because all I could think was, "WTF?!" I called H afterwards and he just started yelling over the phone when I asked him about it. To me, that's a sign that he likely had a conversation about it with his mother already - without me, which is NOT okay.
That is why I was so upset.So we had it out last night.
The general jist was that my bottom line is: We do the three basic steps laid out by the lawyer: 1) probate the house into mother in law's name; 2) mother in law quit claims the house to BOTH H and ME; 3) we obtain a mortgage of our own and satusfy the existing mortgage or assume the existing mortgage...end result: IT'S OURS AND NO ONE ELSE'S. I told H there was no room for compromise. mother in law is NOT to be on anything when all is said and done. I dipped into some things about how she refuses to acknowledge our marriage and disrespects my role/place in his life, etc. Of course, he denied that and again said his mom has mental issues, diabetes, and that's why she's the way she is. Sorry, not buying it. I mean, I do buy it to a degree. But she acknowledges his sister's marriage - why not ours? They helped sister's kids to go to college, and father in law said he would help with easy child's education (which would have been great!) but mother in law put the kabash on that. It was no secret over the years that there was a line drawn between me and my girls and the rest of the family and it hurt. At times, H would acknowledge this, but most often he denies it and says that either I am overreacting or imagining it or that his mother is like that with everyone (she is not).
Anyway, it got ugly but then we got quiet, H came over and hugged me (I asked him, "What?" but he remained silent)...H likes things to be cleaned up before bed time or before he leaves for work...but in the back of my head, I have developed a plan should the need arise. I think all women should have one and I'm angry at myself for this lapse on my behalf.
Thanks for the calm and peace.
Glad everything at least came out in the open Jo.
I sent you a few positive vibes and would have sent you a lot more, but had to keep a portion of it for me at the same time in fear I would be sent to jail when I hauled off and decked SO LOL
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