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PLEASE someone be online...this is LONG
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<blockquote data-quote="DazedandConfused" data-source="post: 67149" data-attributes="member: 831"><p>OMG! I'm cracking up. I've certainly wanted to "gag" times raising my little gag..ir...gifts.</p><p></p><p>As someone who has not been well that ended up having surgery, I understand just wanting to crawl into a hole and pulling the hole down with you. It's hard enough with difficult child when we are on top of our game physically.</p><p></p><p>I think that Rosemond and Greene has their place. I have found both useful depending on the situation. Greene was useful more early on when I was trying to get my bearings after years of difficult child trauma. I was frustrated and exhausted. However, once I managed to get my mojo back I became more Rosemond-like.</p><p></p><p>First off, you need to try to get yourself into a "calm-assertive" state (I love the Dog Whisperer). Not easy, I know.</p><p>If SHOW that you are angry, frustrated, and ready to tie her to the car and drag her, if she is the manipulator as you say, she is going to keep up with the little comments and resistive behavior. It's not fun to throw verbal daggers at a unresponsive target. I also tell my difficult children, "You can think it, but don't you dare say it".</p><p></p><p>The poster (sorry, I don't remember who) that stated that her difficult child LIKED having his room cleared out is on to something. I say this as I am cleaning out my own bedroom preparing to move into my new mastersuite. My decor was romantic. Lots of lace and, frankly, CLUTTER. I don't want the clutter anymore. It's stressful to me now. I'm donating tons of stuff. Maybe Tink has too much stuff and other than punish, clearing her room may lower her stress level, along with yours.</p><p></p><p>One more thing, both my difficult children struggle with picking up after themselves. I got two new chairs that NOBODY was suppose to eat in, yet 18 months later, they are both covered with food stains. Of course, all done when I am not home. And both deny eating in them (yeah, right). So, it's always a work in progress.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DazedandConfused, post: 67149, member: 831"] OMG! I'm cracking up. I've certainly wanted to "gag" times raising my little gag..ir...gifts. As someone who has not been well that ended up having surgery, I understand just wanting to crawl into a hole and pulling the hole down with you. It's hard enough with difficult child when we are on top of our game physically. I think that Rosemond and Greene has their place. I have found both useful depending on the situation. Greene was useful more early on when I was trying to get my bearings after years of difficult child trauma. I was frustrated and exhausted. However, once I managed to get my mojo back I became more Rosemond-like. First off, you need to try to get yourself into a "calm-assertive" state (I love the Dog Whisperer). Not easy, I know. If SHOW that you are angry, frustrated, and ready to tie her to the car and drag her, if she is the manipulator as you say, she is going to keep up with the little comments and resistive behavior. It's not fun to throw verbal daggers at a unresponsive target. I also tell my difficult children, "You can think it, but don't you dare say it". The poster (sorry, I don't remember who) that stated that her difficult child LIKED having his room cleared out is on to something. I say this as I am cleaning out my own bedroom preparing to move into my new mastersuite. My decor was romantic. Lots of lace and, frankly, CLUTTER. I don't want the clutter anymore. It's stressful to me now. I'm donating tons of stuff. Maybe Tink has too much stuff and other than punish, clearing her room may lower her stress level, along with yours. One more thing, both my difficult children struggle with picking up after themselves. I got two new chairs that NOBODY was suppose to eat in, yet 18 months later, they are both covered with food stains. Of course, all done when I am not home. And both deny eating in them (yeah, right). So, it's always a work in progress. [/QUOTE]
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