Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Positive thoughts about difficult child
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Allan-Matlem" data-source="post: 428656" data-attributes="member: 10"><p>Star - making excuses </p><p></p><p>I come home , the kitchen is upside down - there are 2 possible scenarios </p><p>raising voice and criticizing - the response , calm down what's your problem </p><p>making an excuse - I see the kitchen a bit upside , you must have pressurized with your studies </p><p>response - an apology and offer to help or clean up now </p><p></p><p>Kid gone away for the week end , did not phone to wish a good shabbos ( a good shabbat - day of rest )</p><p> me - hi , we did not speak on friday , you must have been pretty busy </p><p>response - an apology and asking how my shabbat went </p><p></p><p>When kids screw up and we are empathic , use understatement , it allows the kid to come forward and take responsibility </p><p></p><p>we hit the ceiling - the focus is now on your loss of control and trying to force the kid so in the kid's eyes you have now become the problem , not what initially set off the interaction.</p><p></p><p>I am not a big one for consequences but one will have more success with the kid actually internalizing the message if one is empathic - you may not go to a friend but you may play on the computer </p><p></p><p>Allan</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Allan-Matlem, post: 428656, member: 10"] Star - making excuses I come home , the kitchen is upside down - there are 2 possible scenarios raising voice and criticizing - the response , calm down what's your problem making an excuse - I see the kitchen a bit upside , you must have pressurized with your studies response - an apology and offer to help or clean up now Kid gone away for the week end , did not phone to wish a good shabbos ( a good shabbat - day of rest ) me - hi , we did not speak on friday , you must have been pretty busy response - an apology and asking how my shabbat went When kids screw up and we are empathic , use understatement , it allows the kid to come forward and take responsibility we hit the ceiling - the focus is now on your loss of control and trying to force the kid so in the kid's eyes you have now become the problem , not what initially set off the interaction. I am not a big one for consequences but one will have more success with the kid actually internalizing the message if one is empathic - you may not go to a friend but you may play on the computer Allan [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Positive thoughts about difficult child
Top