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Parent Emeritus
Possible Borderline (BPD)
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<blockquote data-quote="Snow White" data-source="post: 702159" data-attributes="member: 355"><p>Hi and welcome, carefree. So sorry you are experiencing difficulties.</p><p></p><p>My daughter acts the same way. When it happens on the phone, I tell her that I am not going to listen to any abusive talk and that if it happens I will hang up. Because my daughter doesn't transition well, if she starts going off the rails, I remind her that I am going to hang up. If she continues, I then say, "I'm hanging up now. Goodbye." She doesn't do that often anymore.</p><p></p><p>I'm learning to detach from my daughter and the behaviours that are unacceptable. </p><p></p><p>What is the worst possible thing that would happen if you hung up the phone when she was ranting at you? If she threatens self-harm or suicide, then that ALWAYS means a call to 911. Doing that with our daughter nipped that in the bud pretty quick. And if the 911 call was truly warranted, then all is good, as your daughter will be in safe hands.</p><p></p><p>The Walking on Eggshells book is good and I also found "When Your Adult Child Breaks Your Heart" to be a great resource.</p><p></p><p>Hang in there and keep posting. We're here to help.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Snow White, post: 702159, member: 355"] Hi and welcome, carefree. So sorry you are experiencing difficulties. My daughter acts the same way. When it happens on the phone, I tell her that I am not going to listen to any abusive talk and that if it happens I will hang up. Because my daughter doesn't transition well, if she starts going off the rails, I remind her that I am going to hang up. If she continues, I then say, "I'm hanging up now. Goodbye." She doesn't do that often anymore. I'm learning to detach from my daughter and the behaviours that are unacceptable. What is the worst possible thing that would happen if you hung up the phone when she was ranting at you? If she threatens self-harm or suicide, then that ALWAYS means a call to 911. Doing that with our daughter nipped that in the bud pretty quick. And if the 911 call was truly warranted, then all is good, as your daughter will be in safe hands. The Walking on Eggshells book is good and I also found "When Your Adult Child Breaks Your Heart" to be a great resource. Hang in there and keep posting. We're here to help. [/QUOTE]
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