Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Principal calls. difficult child sleeping. Wants me to come get him, he's "wasting their time".
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 263889" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>Risperdal affected difficult child 1 like this, even on tiny doses. It got so we could only dose him in the evening, because he would take quarter of a tablet and ten fall asleep for most of the day. Not good. difficult child 3, a third his age at the time, took three times the risperdal without the sedation factor. So you can never be sure how it will affect someone.</p><p></p><p>The para does sound like a possible suspect for the "he's a waste of space" accusations. </p><p></p><p>Thinking back to your previous post on the topic, maybe it's not been the principal so much after all? Or is this para cultivated by principal, and being a snitch and nessage-taker? I can understand the school nurse saying that concerns have been expressed from Special Education department and you interpreting that as coming from SpEd teacher, when in fact it could have been this particular aide?</p><p></p><p>I'd be quietly asking the nurse if perhaps the message came from this aide after all - and in which case, I'd be asking to have her removed as difficult child's aide. She's already blotted her copybook a few times, she doesn't sound like she's motivted to support him. And from my experience - aides we have had, have been almost asmother-tigress towards my boys, as I am. </p><p></p><p>Yesterday I bumped into difficult child 1's former aide (also his English teacher at the time). It reminded me that while she was suitable professional and detached, she went way beyond the call of duty in trying to get her lazy colleagues to dshift themselves and provide the support and information she needed, to do her job. The whole process in difficult child 1's case was being undermined at acting-principal level, by the deputy (because the then principal was off on sick leave a lot of the time, having chemo for breast cancer which she unfortunately did not survive - a lovely lady who would have helped us, if she hadn't been "sheltered" from what was really going on with the megalomaniac deputy).</p><p></p><p>Shari, there's ongoing skulduggery here. WHile I feel the air of concerned response that you take in your letters is appropriate, I tihnk it's time to stop giving them so much rope - keep future letters shorter, much shorter. This will give the clear impression of "I want this silly game to stop" while still being polite and friendly. In the letter you sent, you first raised a real concern about a strange asttitude on the part of the shcool which is also congtradicting the IEP - and you then go on to say that you are also concerned about difficult child being sleepy! By doing this, you distracted the reader of your letter from the main issue - the school not following through on previous agreements and some woodworm in your son's support structure.</p><p></p><p>Stick to the important issue - if you need to mention you are also concerned by your son's over-sleeping, then say so briefly. "We are also concerned by his sleeping but this is a medical issue which we are working on independently, it has already been established at his IEP meeting that if he falls asleep in class he is to be left to sleep, because it is too disruptive to wake him. Taking him home is not an option and would also not achieve any learning outcomes. If this is not satisfactory then we need to schedule another IEP meeting to discuss this and it would be beneficial to have present, officials from higher up the Special Education system in the district, to advise the school on the right way to handle these matters without breaching anti-discrimination legislation."</p><p></p><p>Check this last phrase - it is what I wqould say in our situaiton here, I'm not sure what sort of legislation you have. For us, a child with a disability is entitled to asmuch support as you can get/as he needs, in order to get an equal shot at a decent education. For exampe, if a school fails to provide alternatives to a blindchild and instead only provides work written on the blackboard, or a school has a child in a wheelchair but fails to put in ramps or similar to allow the child to get access to all the areas the child needs to get to - that school is in breach of anti-discrimination laws. In the same way, a teacher who punishes an autisticchild for stimming or for tics, is in breach of antidiscrimination laws here. But I dont beleive in pouncing too hard - I make it clear that the school is in breach by informnig them in writing along with asking thme what they intend to do to rectify te situation, often I also include some (polite!) suggestions on better alternative management strategies. And only after they fail to comply and have had reasonable time to begin to make changes, THEN I take the matter higher up. </p><p></p><p>Sometimes that 'reasonable amount of time' has of necessity to be shortened; once I had to act within hours, because we were about to lose a classroom and a teacher which would have seriously disadvantaged difficult child 3. In that case it was the District I was gunning for and not the school.</p><p></p><p>So the next piece of advice - know your target. In your case, you need to determine who is the fly in the ointment here (or as I described it before, the woodworm in the support structure). Is it this particular aide? Or the principal? Or both, tag-teaming?</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 263889, member: 1991"] Risperdal affected difficult child 1 like this, even on tiny doses. It got so we could only dose him in the evening, because he would take quarter of a tablet and ten fall asleep for most of the day. Not good. difficult child 3, a third his age at the time, took three times the risperdal without the sedation factor. So you can never be sure how it will affect someone. The para does sound like a possible suspect for the "he's a waste of space" accusations. Thinking back to your previous post on the topic, maybe it's not been the principal so much after all? Or is this para cultivated by principal, and being a snitch and nessage-taker? I can understand the school nurse saying that concerns have been expressed from Special Education department and you interpreting that as coming from SpEd teacher, when in fact it could have been this particular aide? I'd be quietly asking the nurse if perhaps the message came from this aide after all - and in which case, I'd be asking to have her removed as difficult child's aide. She's already blotted her copybook a few times, she doesn't sound like she's motivted to support him. And from my experience - aides we have had, have been almost asmother-tigress towards my boys, as I am. Yesterday I bumped into difficult child 1's former aide (also his English teacher at the time). It reminded me that while she was suitable professional and detached, she went way beyond the call of duty in trying to get her lazy colleagues to dshift themselves and provide the support and information she needed, to do her job. The whole process in difficult child 1's case was being undermined at acting-principal level, by the deputy (because the then principal was off on sick leave a lot of the time, having chemo for breast cancer which she unfortunately did not survive - a lovely lady who would have helped us, if she hadn't been "sheltered" from what was really going on with the megalomaniac deputy). Shari, there's ongoing skulduggery here. WHile I feel the air of concerned response that you take in your letters is appropriate, I tihnk it's time to stop giving them so much rope - keep future letters shorter, much shorter. This will give the clear impression of "I want this silly game to stop" while still being polite and friendly. In the letter you sent, you first raised a real concern about a strange asttitude on the part of the shcool which is also congtradicting the IEP - and you then go on to say that you are also concerned about difficult child being sleepy! By doing this, you distracted the reader of your letter from the main issue - the school not following through on previous agreements and some woodworm in your son's support structure. Stick to the important issue - if you need to mention you are also concerned by your son's over-sleeping, then say so briefly. "We are also concerned by his sleeping but this is a medical issue which we are working on independently, it has already been established at his IEP meeting that if he falls asleep in class he is to be left to sleep, because it is too disruptive to wake him. Taking him home is not an option and would also not achieve any learning outcomes. If this is not satisfactory then we need to schedule another IEP meeting to discuss this and it would be beneficial to have present, officials from higher up the Special Education system in the district, to advise the school on the right way to handle these matters without breaching anti-discrimination legislation." Check this last phrase - it is what I wqould say in our situaiton here, I'm not sure what sort of legislation you have. For us, a child with a disability is entitled to asmuch support as you can get/as he needs, in order to get an equal shot at a decent education. For exampe, if a school fails to provide alternatives to a blindchild and instead only provides work written on the blackboard, or a school has a child in a wheelchair but fails to put in ramps or similar to allow the child to get access to all the areas the child needs to get to - that school is in breach of anti-discrimination laws. In the same way, a teacher who punishes an autisticchild for stimming or for tics, is in breach of antidiscrimination laws here. But I dont beleive in pouncing too hard - I make it clear that the school is in breach by informnig them in writing along with asking thme what they intend to do to rectify te situation, often I also include some (polite!) suggestions on better alternative management strategies. And only after they fail to comply and have had reasonable time to begin to make changes, THEN I take the matter higher up. Sometimes that 'reasonable amount of time' has of necessity to be shortened; once I had to act within hours, because we were about to lose a classroom and a teacher which would have seriously disadvantaged difficult child 3. In that case it was the District I was gunning for and not the school. So the next piece of advice - know your target. In your case, you need to determine who is the fly in the ointment here (or as I described it before, the woodworm in the support structure). Is it this particular aide? Or the principal? Or both, tag-teaming? Marg [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Principal calls. difficult child sleeping. Wants me to come get him, he's "wasting their time".
Top